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CSA Advice

How do you avoid paying the CSA?

2 March 2010 by flint

Starting new job. How do I not pay CSA? Or pay really low £5.

P.S. any fans of PWC jog on. I dont care what you have to say. Any people talking about morals or being a good dad… bla bla bla
Jog on. Did all that, got me no where just in debt.

So ill say again how do I avoid not paying CSA? Maybe when I go to work use a friend’s national insurance number? Ask a friend to open a bank in his name?.

Any comments relating to avoiding CSA please, nothing else.

351 thoughts on “How do you avoid paying the CSA?”

  1. The only way i think you can get away with not paying a penny is to scare the mother into not wanting any money from you.

    If say for example the mother doesnt want you to have any contact with the child. Harp up saying you dont feel comfortable paying moeny for a child which you are not permitted to see. Be careful about saying or demanding “your” rights. Phrase anything as “the child has a right to” and twist it to suit your need.

    The main care person can stop the CSA claiming money from you at any time. So get sneaky, and make it worth their while not to have your money.

    Fight the good fight. Fuck the CSA and the stupid amount of power the goverment has given to them. The most one sided crappy stupid retarded acency ever. Fathers should have a version to screw over the Mothers.

  2. just the sound of ‘CSA’ reminds me of the worst case of the shits I have ever experienced

    NRP

  3. Reading the stuff on this page reminds me of how pissed off I am with the CSA system and how it deals with NRP’s
    some of the comments here are quite harsh but I think it is important to show how angry NRP’s are. Thankyou moderator for keeping this stuff available for people to read

    I am waiting to celebrate the death of the CSA

  9. The CSA need more powers to deal with dads who will do everything to avoid providing for their own flesh and blood

  10. my ex has got csa on me now there taking 25% (120) of my wages a month might not seem alot but i only come out with around 700 amonth for full time 40 a week im only 23 and iv got rent to pay,car insurance and odd debt here and there.I cant belive the cheek of my ex she is 21 now has got two kids to differnt dads got a nice 2 bed house thanks to the tax payer claims every benifit she can even tho she works part time and to top it off the new boyfriend who is not down as living there works full time so the cheeky slag still thinks shes entiled to my money even tho i never go out drinking because i have to watch my money as im on nm wage and i dont like borrowing from people, the first payment is at the end of the month and after iv payed up im left with 376 to last me how is this fair someone should name and shame the people that work/want to work for the csa because i would love to knock on there door and say hello and thank them then leave for there brill work

  12. well im chilling my wife took everything off me when we devorced ,fuking bitch ,but guess what i thought fuk it let the fuking goverment look after me , so i claimed rent of 500 a month for my sis ,i got my teeth done free i drove a car got caught delibratley , so i was locked up , so they had to feed me had a tv pool etc , love it in prison , so what t i do now is just go around pissin about etc , try to rip off the tax man , me and my mates working on that rip the fuking barsteds off millions , youl hear about it 1 day on the news ,its only a matter of time .. fuk theis country uk and the bithes ..

  13. Right people, we need to do something to get the CSA closed. Any ideas??? They are crippling my family with the money they want off my husband.. For all the women on hear moaning they want money off there ex’s GET A GRIP!!! Give your kids to there dads, Im sure they would be happy to look after them and you pay them CSA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  14. I have been finished with the CSA for about 3yrs, my daughter is now 22, yesterday I had a letter from them saying that the case is closed……outstanding arrers £2800……Hey, I payed by standing order till she was 19….I phoned and a guy rang me back after 2hrs saying he still couldnt find out what its for, now this is someone who has my file in front of them, wtf, hes looking into but no doubt the letters will keep coming and coming and coming and coming and coming and coming and coming and no one will beable to tell me what its for….

  15. Just read through this, this is all so sad.

    My ex Won’t pay any money as he always says he has none but he does as he has a good job. If he didn’t want to know his daughter I would never have asked for a penny but he does buys a doll or something when he visits (once a month), we live 2 hours from him.

    It is only 15% and he went beserk saying he would have loads of visitation etc etc so I have left the CSA as I don’t want him dictating to me for the rest of my life. This man also ran away when I was pregnant and treated me like crap throughout the relationship, cheating etc. Anyway the point I am trying to get to is some men, not all HATE to pay their ex anything, they do not see it going to the child, they see it as going to you and sorry but they don’t love you anymore so they detest doing so. So if they occassionally come and see the kids and buy them a few and a bits and bobs and take them for lunch or something and you have a quieter life because of this and they can afford the CSA (because some genuinely cannot, not my ex but some) then let them keep their 15% because you have won, you have your child full time and that is worth more than any money they would give you anyway. When their children grow up and learn the truth they will have zero disrespect for him if he had the money to pay so like I said ask yourself what is more important their 15% worth it and an insane amount of stress, control and hassle till their 18 or a peaceful life of happiness with your little one/s. I personally would rather do 2 jobs than have his money. It’s just my opinion.

  16. ANYONE who chooses to be such a low life and not provide for a child they have made should be sterilized and their dirty, disgusting mug shot plastered all over the web so that girls that should have more sense will know what vile men there are out there that in my opinion should be disposed of permantly, especially that twat Flinn. evil piece of sht

  17. Is the man with a the advice about defrauding the government not concerned about the inand revenue looking you up? If yoiu think they can’t find you, then you are not only a dead beat dad but a stupid one at that. Let us all know when they get you.I for one, will be pointing them in the right direction. Sleep well

  18. just stumbled across this. very interested how a man who is seeking tips on how to prevent paying for his child tells a woman who ‘apparently’ can’t afford to feed her own kids to “keep her legs shut”. same advice for you then mister, if you can’t afford to keep your own then keep it in your trousers! i myself personally have no wish go to the c.s.a, and that’s not because i feel low life pathetic excuses for fathers such as yourself have a right to deny their offspring money. i prefer to think that when my child grows up and realises the stuggles i’ve gone through to put clothes on her back and food in her mouth (with or without government money) she appreciates what a mother i am and what remembers me for the things I’VE provided rather than the one off expensive present her ‘father’ manages once a year! all of the ‘men’ who are expressing like minded opinion of the asker of this question should be castrated!

  19. “Quote Karen: I dont weed any money out of the NRP, he doesnt support his children, goes and has more and continues not to support them properly when he earns a lot of money.”

    Well gee whiz, you sure picked a winner to get knocked up by 🙂

  20. I wonder if the goverment would rise to kick off’s like the little toe rags did last week. or the students did. seems to be the only way out. I wonder if they would answer to that, millions of men saying no more! or how long it will take for NRP to snap under pressure. you ask any MP to live like this.

    200 per month on fuel
    100 on Ensurance
    50 per week food
    360 CSA
    90 Council Tax
    500 rent
    MOT
    Car repairs
    Electric
    Gas
    Soap tooth brush shower gell.
    Entertainment for the kids “Comic” thats your lot if your lucky lets draw ont he walls. play hide and seek for the next 15 years. youll have to wear the shity clothes your mother provides for life ASDA speacials while she dresses in nice clothes actin a slag with your money.
    1200 already before you add the rest having heating or lights is a luxury. I get 1400/ out of that i pay CSA. you tell me what your supossed to get your kids on there birthday???? explain that to me these single women dont suffer. I seen them driving new cars. driving past the X thats walking to work and honkin there horn and they have a partner that works and earns more money. how do you expect some one not to snap. I’d expect somthing in the news soon enough. and why the goverment havent stoped this clear breach of human rites is because these women will cry to the system and they cant afford it. cant afford kids dont have them. or give them to the NRP. cheeky women ranting about abuse to get things fast tracked. one day youll all have to pay it back if not with money by the resentment of your kids for blocking access to the kids so you get max CSA. Hell will have women! MEN stay clear of women and be Gay or stick to beating the meat. Sick bitches! how is this fair on a man. you tell me. ripping him off for all his money. for what to have nothing. the kids cant even go out they get bored of going to daddys and hes a no body because he has nothing to give them. apart from love kids want days out DVDS sweets clothes holidays. dad will live in shit for years. and the mother gets the lot. new goverment policy if you have a child and you cant afford one they will go into care and you’ll be forced to pay the system. both parents. why is it all the farthers responcb

  21. Sick of the CSA. will some one say somthing find out a way to pay less CSA.

    I cant breeth. life is tuff.

  22. Natalie, totally agree with some men being castrated, then maybe they wouldn’t fall foul of some desperate women that decides to make a life changing decision for the poor bloke by saying she’s still taking contraception when she’s not just to trap him. Maybe some women should be sterilized!! There is two sides to every story and its not always the blokes fault. Just remember that.

    I’m ashamed at some women!!!!!!!!!!!

  23. Hey, who the hell would not want to provide for their kids.. bleeding ek just paid £600 for uniform £120 for fitted shoes, still need to get p.e kit and trainers so another £200 + to be spent for the basics with no spares …… so there is many months or so of CSA payment for 3 kiddies!!!!!
    never mind the £36 per week bus fares …. £60 per week dinners….. All this with £25 a week from the ex who earrns £25k per year and some how gets away with not much more, does not bother now seeing his 3 kids coz he cant be arsed!!!!
    Get a grip people kids cost money!!!!! How can you not want to help out with the cost of them! this place is really in ruins ;-(

  24. Hey I’m female and have to agree with the guys on this one- all the PWC think about is how to get one over on their ex’s. If they were thinking of their children’s welfare they would cut the CSA out and ask the NRP for clothes or other things their kids need- And why is this based on salary?! Surely if the CSA take in to account the salary of the NRP they should look at the PWC income too and it amazes me that some NRP can be paying £5 a week when others pay £75- how can one child cost 70 quid more than another?! They can’t exactly- so why is it not fairer on the NRP and why can’t the CSA tell the PWC that, if they are to process the PWC claim, that theNRP must see the child as often as THE NRP would like- they should have as much say as the PWC does on what the money goes on, the two of them did after all create this child/children together- even if it wasn’t a joint decision. Children need role models and by scrounging off another person because they are bitter the relationship ismover or for whatever the reason is no example to set a child. I’m not disputing kids cost money but really, when most PWC make that CSA claim the last thing they are thinking of is nappies or food, it’s usually childcare for when they go out and spend their ex’s money when, if they just let their ex look after his or her child form the night when they wanted to go out they could save a he’ll of a money on childcare and the child wouldn’t feel like their mum/dad who they never get to see, doesn’t want to see them. To all single parents out there who have agreed to accept money from their ex’ without the CSA being involved- I have so much respect for you- you are the people who have the decency to accept that the relationship is over and that there are ,ore important things than getting your own back on your ex- you’re the caring parents who have thought about your children and not used them as pawns in a fucked up game to suck as much money out of your ex as physically possible.

  25. i agree that not all fathers are the same..but my ex is the lowest of the low….no Christmas, birthday cards or presents for is children…just not interested..doing his best to continue to avoid paying CSA at moment by registering himself as a managing director of his own company..consisting of himself and 2 moth eaten allsations! When the CSA suggested that he make token payments of £5 until the case is sorted out he refused on the grounds of his assessment might say he has a nil payment decision! This has been going on in one form or another for 5 years now..he has amassed arrears already but I am rapidly giving up hope of ever getting a contribution from him…strangely enough him and his mother just can’t understand why his children hate him!!!!! There are some wonderful fathers in the world who would do anything for there children, my current partner is one of these, but there are some pathetic excuses for human beings who don’t deserve children. But when these men are old and lonely, with no grandchildren or children coming to visit them on their birthdays or at Christmas, maybe they will look back and reflect on that old saying…..what goes around comes around…..

  26. I was married 10 years had a daughterin the marriage found out ex wife was cheating i left divorced her she also told me i would have to take her to court to get access to my daughter which i could not afford, left her with car £140k home furniture struck a deal with her and solicitors she gets house with no maintenance or she pays me half the value and ill pay her maintence. Now i get taken 60% of my wages i cant afford to work as my fuel bill is high and not being left with enough money now after working since i was 15 now 39 it looks like i am going to have to pack in work as im unable to afford what the csa want and my living expenses with just rent council tax and fuel for car im skint no money for food gas electric clothes. Wonder if the government have breached my human rights. She just spounges off the government with her benefits and dla even though there is nothing wrong with her just lazy. Thanks CSA you have made me unemployed.

  27. Hey Taffy,
    CSA only take 15% for one child less your PRIVATE PENSION contribution, which is deductable AND you get it back later etc, so take half the house value and get your own place. She can’t have maintenance and CSA, one cancels out the other.
    Get smart fast and protect yourself.

    I would never suggest it but after a pension is sorted, and the starting up fees are covered , they do not track if you keep paying it………… but a pension is recommended .

  28. When I split with my ex, we knew that allowing the CSA to get involved would leave her worse off, because any money they took from me would be deducted from her benefits. (She had difficulty working due to RSI) and would leave me unable to contribute to our child.

    Since she is a type 1 diabetic, and stress is seriously bad for for her health, she got a doctor’s certificate saying this and the same rule that exempts women with abusive exes from having to go through the CSA applied.

    I was then able to buy food clothes toys etc to contribute, leaving them better off.

  29. Pleaae tell me how it is fair that my wife runs off with another man because I was working too long hours to support her and the kids and now she is living with him and I am supporting her lifestyle still, £400a month out of my wages is ridiculous, it costs nowhere near that to feed and clothe the kids a month, I still have a house to run, I still want to take kids out weekends but can’t afford it, she now works full time so shouldn’t she be responsible for half of their upbringing? not in this Fucked up world, she does the crime and I do the time! I dont begrudge paying for my kids, but a fair amount and how about leaving me some money to enjoy my time with them.

  30. Hi

    I am female and hate the CSA i have very strong views about it, as they dont take circumstances into account. Anyway long story cut short, my partner went to court for arrears they said he had to pay £60 a month, said he couldnt afford that but they wouldnt budge, every now and again i paid £5 £10 but never £60 as we dont have much left ourselves. He has been summoned to court again for failing to pay, advice is what happens if he doesnt go, he said they can go jump and hes not going, he should be going today, just want to know what might happen Thanks guys xxx

  31. Stacie, please can you and Flint and all others stop judging all PWC! And vice versa to anyone judging all NRP! Each of us have our own individual stories and problems. I myself, am unusual, in that having been a PWC for 10 years uptil 3 years ago, I am now NRP as well! 2 of my 4 children moved to live with their dad and his wife and daughter on the hope that he would stop working abroad and they could see him more. He broke his promise of doing this and now one of them has moved back home.

    I myself cannot abide CSA. They’ve let me and my children down for years and my ex husband on his 4 foreign holidays a year, new house, yearly refurbs on the house and extension, £32k spent on IVF to have their daughter (while spending this money I was asking for him to give me at least half of the new school term uniform, stationary, coats etc costs and he refused!), top of the range 4×4 and now private schooling for their youngest!

    I was also quite happy for him to atleast help me with cost of clothing and school trips if he was so adverse to sending me the money! But no, I got nothing! Not even help with my petrol when I would drive the children down to see him! (we live 3 hours apart)! I only went to CSA and Courts to try and get him to support me somehow!!!

    And before Flint starts to accuse me of being fat, lazy etc…I don’t leech from the state, I have 2 jobs and have done since the youngest could go to playgroup. They are now 19, 17, 16 and 14. I’ve managed to bring them up alone without financial support and they are balanced children. And not once did I stop them from seeing their dad because no matter what was happening between him and I, I didn’t want it to worry or affect them. And who was I to play god?

    And Flint, there were times when I would cry and cry and think suicidal thoughts particulary when falling behind on rent and council tax and being threatened with eviction! Having intimidating Bailiffs walk in my house, repossessing a car I saved up for, and pricing what little I had infront of my young children, while I threw up in the toilet and collapsed, followed by a nervous breakdown, was vile!!! So you see PWC, do suffer emotional distress too.

    I’m now both PWC and NRP and my ex still squirrels his £100k in an offshore account in Jersey and is assessed by CSA at paying me nothing! CSA have assessed him earning less that £5 a week!!! However, I now have to find £200 a month for my one son living with him while he and his wife do their trips to Thailand and Spain every year and pay £10k a term for their 6 year old daughter. And must also mention ontop of his wages he also has his own business running in the UK while he works abroad now and again!

    All I earn, goes on my children and will continue to do so BECAUSE, I chose to have my children, albeit while married, but still, they are mine and my life is on hold as it should be all of yours, to pay for their upkeep until they fly the nest. All NRP’s should be the same. And for the like’s of Flint and I HATE CSA! You should be ashamed of yourselves trying everything in your power to not contribute to YOUR childrens upkeep and education! YOU helped make them and bring them into this world and all children should be able to look upto their parents, love them and rely on them.

    There are good and bad NRP’s and good and bad PWC. Don’t judge everyone else on your own misgivings. Its not fair.

  32. Wilson…..I too have all these outgoings and like you can’t afford to take my children on holiday or drive a fancy car. My sofa is spliting at the seams and have had it since I first got married and the same carpets for 10 years. I don’t have a partner to lean on….again, my point (please read my previous post) not ALL PWC are the same!!!!

  33. CSA are cunt’s end of ! ….and that bitch i shaged after 10pints for my fucking money i earn wile she piss’s it all up the wall

  35. Well.. I’m so greatful my ex settled for £200 a month rather than the 40% I was threatened with.. now I cant afford food, cant afford to support my sick partner and cant afford fuel to pick my children up. I cant afford to get to work.. I’ve had to take out 2 high interest payday loans to survive this month.

    Well done.

  36. The women on here. Beyond words. You’re giving PWC the bad name.
    Jesus.

    And the girl who said she works for CSA and has recently signed a repossession order on someone’s home- does that make you feel good? Does that make you feel like a big girl?! You were the spotty cat at school who pulled the pretty girls pigtails weren’t you?

    My poor partner is a hard HARD working man, we have a lovely house, a lovely car and a great life- we face losing EVERYTHING because his ex wants money for a child he doesn’t know is his- and we have to pay for a DNA test (£250+) she didn’t tell him she was pregnant, he didn’t know he was going to be a father till she was in labour.

    They were in a relationship and he had no reason to assume she was no longer on contraception.

    OBVIOUSLY if he had of known, he would have made her have an abortion as any sensible man would. He didn’t want the child. Now he’s stuck being told he’s got to pay RIDICULOUS amounts of money because he earns a lot.

    They take MY wages into account, but not the mother nor the mothers parter. How is that fair?

    If you get a women pregnant (whatever your situation) and she refuses to have an abortion, make sure you get a signed document to say you will never pay a penny. This doesn’t have to be drawn up by lawyers, providing it’s witnessed by someone professional it is legally binding.

    I know it’s too late for all you poor men on here. I hope good comes of this and these terrible women are left in the gutters they belong- segregated from society, pinned with signs saying ‘pre-used, do not touch’.

    P.s, love the women who said it costs £600+ a month to raise a child. Try not buying them Next clothes (or more likely Addidas/Kappa) and try being realistic- silly, silly women.

  37. Amanda,

    From what I understand you’re partner could face jail time. Another of the many delights of CSA. Absolute jokes.

    Keep fighting the good fight, and good luck.

    xo

  38. Jenny, thank God there are decent self-thinking women around who don’t align themselves immediately with the man-hating-feminazis who seem to think that as soon as a child is born one of the parents (the dad) has zero rights and is more an inconvenience than a help and is only there to work themselves into the ground to fund the mothers excessive lifestyle of multiple holidays and designer clothes.
    Those women are scum and the sooner their self-serving crap gets recognised for what it is the better this country will be but with the utterly pointless & gutless politicians we have all of whom are pandering to the female vote regardless of them being guilty of treason to their own sex I very much doubt this will be anytime soon. Well done feminazis and weak minded liberal PC politicians….you’ve fucked all men for generations to come.

    The CSA are there as a tool to subjugate fathers…end of…..it serves the purposes of the misandrists in our society and they have the cheek to lie and say its for the good of the children. What a complete pile of crap.

    My X has used the children as weapons from day one of her having an affair and then making false accusations to get me out of the house, after a year of fighting to get access to my kids again she realised I was also a free baby sitting service so agreed to access. But that hasn’t stopped her hounding me with the help of the CSA wanting more and more money making up ludicrous statements and all the CSA do is whatever she wants so its me that has to worry how I’m going to pay the mortagage and keep the kids from being harmed by all of this.
    Unlike their slag of a mother with one “step-daddy” after another who palms the kids off onto anybody willing to have them while she continues to live the high life and laughing at the fact she’s been given a free-ride to act the utter cuntbag that she is. I pray daily she gets cancer, in the long run my kids would be better off without her evil influence in their lives.

    Anyone who works for the CSA should be ashamed of themselves…you are the lowest of the low…but I doubt any of you can feel shame can you…evil fuckers!

  39. c.s.a. is a joke, i left my greedy bitch of an ex 2 years ago, but when i left all i took was the clothes on my back, i left her the house, the contents of the house, and even the car, since then she has been back and forth to c.s.a telling them im not in contact with her or the kids, when i have them every weekend, she was skint one month and asked me to help her out so on top of c.s.a i gave her £160 to pay what i thought was her bills. i earn £1200 a month and c.s.a take £304 off me every month, i recieved a letter 2 months back stating that i owe them £1500, wtf, they are just coming up with sums out of no where, i am now forced to sing on to j.s.a tomorrow as i can not afford to support my fiance and our 2 kids.

  40. looking at all these stories, i feel so glad that im not the only one getting hell off c.s.a
    susan, stick your threats where the sun dont shine, c.s.a cant touch what we havent got,
    so i will be phoning c.s.a tomorrow and i will be telling them “sorry but i can no longer afford these payments coz my bitch of an ex has just taken out a court case on me and i need that money to pay solicitors fees,” what can they do? if they take your money out of your bank with out permission it is theft, and i will take them to the cleaners if they play me, coz i can play games better than the next freak in a suit. word to these pwc you get child benafit and child tax credit what do us nrps get to support our children at weekends? sweet f.a. thats what. and you still expect us nrps to supply the food,drinks, snacks, clothes, nightware, nappies and toys for 2 1/2 days a week. not only that but if we cant afford to give our children good xmas or birthday prezzies we are bad fathers for paying too much to c.s.a.
    what the hell is david cameron doing to this contry, i read that he has said us nrps are as bad as drink drivers and should be punished in the same way, what femminist drug has he been taking? what he needs to ask him self is, “if my missus left me would i pay her 25% of my wages? have the kids for 2 1/2 days a week and spent just as much in 2 days as what c.s.a. expect me to give them” i know what his answer would be “FUCK NO!!!” Having to hand out 50% of your wadges just coz you wanted to get out of a relationship that did not work and you knew your kids would be better in a home alone with there mother than in a home with both parents constantly down each others throats, you get punished for putting your kids first, most nrp walked away from there ex’s not there kids. time c.s.a and cameron realised that!!!!!!!!!!

  41. im in the army and the wife in the raf – i have a child from previous and my assessment is high due to my income

    i get that however i pay over 800 a month in childcare which allows me and my wife to work, with out this one of us would have to give up work. the csa dont take this into account, surely they realise i need someone to look after my young children to work to pay me assessment

    fair is paying, this aint fair

  42. i was raped, abused and cheated on by my partner i was considering not clamin for csa, because that would help me however it would not help my child. men need to take responsibility, if they arnt contributing emotionally, it needs to be done financially. you have a CHOICE! real men would agree that it should be both. If you can get a girl pregnant you should contribute. its not about you its about your own flesh and blood. its already painful enough for a child to grow up feeling neglect and reject. same goes to mothers as woman do it too.

    i susspect the negative comment that are here are from ppl who have been rejected at some point in the lives and are angry. just imagine what this will do to your children. do you want them as messed up as you???

    its also clear as certain woman are defending there men. i was in that position fooled! now iv his baby. but iv got my baby and woke up and walked away. i hope you dont get taken for a ride ladies, as your no better than the one before. i left with scars but a beautiful son. you maybe left with nothing but scars. open your eyes woman and men your worth so much more than ignorance and bitterness. btw not all men are bad.

  43. the best way to avoid the csa is too grow up be a dad and sit dwn with your childs mother and make a fair and mutual conribution, it will be cheaper and will avoid heartache to both parties, most importantly the CHILD. the only ppl on the site i symphize with on this issue is the men who are stopped from seeing there child and the woman who go to csa because there a substancial amount of money in it for them, there are some bitter vindictive greedy woman out there unfortunatly and they give woman like us a bad name. but theres also alot of men out there that are lying dellussional and irresponsible and give men a bad name. all off you men and woman bloody GROW UP for the innocent children who didnt ask to be brought into your mess.

  44. oh i hate csa! youve got issues. you need to see your doctor to get some chill pills, even the mildest assholes would agree with that.

  45. Okay my two cents, I have been spilt from my ex for 8 years or more, i never involved the csa when they tried to harreas claiming my benefits will be cut if i dont give them my childs dads details, anyway i never did give them nout because i really didnt want the aggro that would come with it as he can be aggressive, any foward 8 years or so and he has two more kids one concieved while cheating on the other there is a 6 month gap between the kids, any way the one he cheated with has reported him and now they are going to take a first payment direct from his employers, he is saying he wants me to fill out some child support form along with his other babies mother because otherwise the one who is complaining will get over a hundred a week?! I dont really care as i never wanted nothing from him, but he has given my name and address and says i will be receiveing a letter to fill out, i am not sure i want to get involved as it will ultimately have an effect on my financial situation and i dont want to change it for other people when it works for me and my son.. What can i do that reqiures minimal involvement, while keeping things civil.. as obviously having half of your wages taken is going to make the situation sticky to say the least.. I do think its unfair he has half his wage taken for one child with no recognition of the responsabilities he has running his own home and his other kid and my son.

  46. Oh i forgot to mention that aside from our differences, he does have his boy every other weekend and holidays, he also buys him school uniform and other clothing as well as gives him pocket money and xmas bday gifts ect. If te csa take half his wage judgeing from what everyone else has said i have realised my boy will be worse off as his dad will no longer be able to afford to by school uniform or the other things he will also proably struggle to keep the routinely visits which ultimatley will affect my son…although we don’t get on or rather i dont like him because his attitude towrds me sucks, i don’t like to see anyone unfairly treated especially some one who’s stability and incertainity will have effect on my son’s emotional well being.. he wants both his parents to be happy!

  47. meet my ex 18 years ago after 8 weeks she fell preg being a Gent i was with her even after my son was born (i gave up my job as a tour guide) she lived with her mum and dad the day came when my son was born,that’s when things went tits up
    the ex mother said its my daughter i go in as my son was ready to be born even when they left hospital they never even told me they never had the decency to put my name on the birth certificate,as Father my ex has a mental issue and the social workers told her that she could not look after the child but because am not named as the father i have no rights but yet she still lives a single life and claims child benefit even though she lives on her own and my son has never lived with her only with the grandparents and the mother and grandparents have refused to let me see my son for 18 years even 16 years ago my own mother had two weeks to live from cancer and my ex still refused to bring my son to see her ,,, even now 18 years later my father aged 72 and in poor health and my ex still refuses to bring him round well i know he is a teen now but i pay £80 per week from a wage of £212 i never had a life for 18 years i can not all this time afford to drink smoke or even meet someone new not till he is 21 that’s what the CSA have told me
    my ex never looked after my son but claims child benefit /working tax credit /housing benefit and gets a new car every year and the csa will not contact the social workers as proof that my ex was unable to look after my son i tried but they say am not named as father so they can not give me the info she even as profiles on dating sites 6-7 years ago and still up now saying she has a kid but don’t live with her

  48. My husband had an affair and left I have never stopped him having contact I have begged him to have contact w ith his kids he wont pay for the kids even when the csa got involved he said if he paid for the kids how can he pay to go to chile to see the person he had the affair with not all ex are out to get money I just want my kids to have contact with there dad but he would rather pay for
    The person he had the affair with by taking her on holidays and other things and not pay a thing for his kids or have any contact with thdm

  49. what exactly do the csa do,i phoned them up when my son who i have not seen for 15 years turned 16.when i phoned i said that i had heard he had left school therefore out of fulltime education so i thought jackpot my payments will stop,na no chance they said they would look into it but most times they are lied to about a childs status,hmmm sounds like fraud to me,then i phoned again and they said it wasnt there department i am going to phone again next week but im not holding my breath,oh aye i always gave a present to that boots father for my son bdays and xmas never got a thank u once missed a bday got a phonecall frm her sister saying it wasnt fair i wasnt helping her out away and throw shite at the moon

  50. i know im gonna get called this and that and im a horrible bla bla bla but heres my story.. I had a best mate she lives about 200 yards away from me known each other since i was two. we got stupid and had sex a few times she said she was on the pill. but im at work (when i was working) one day i get a text she says shes pregnant and didnt know it and its deinately mine? and it was to late to get an abortion. now im getting weekly texts cause i dont come an hang out and see her or the kid calling me effin this n that. Ive always not been partial to children i dont like being near them i hate it when they cry it just makes me uncomfortable to the point of shaking i cant handle them and she knows this she used to laugh how i freak out but its not funny now. i tried to hold him once and had to like leave.i appreciate how hard shes trying and shes a saint but she just keeps asking for money that ive not got i dont have a job and i have payed her 3 times what i could even bought like high end baby monitors, clothes etc but im in debt aready with credit cards and such I just cant afford it. Ive said to her for years ill never be a dad to any kid i never planned on having any and i never want any but she seems to have it in her head “ill come around and love him” i just dont feel anything for the kid its cute but thats all. So if she says shes going to the CSA what do i say to her even though she knows i have nothing to spare and have told her when i am in employment again i will give her money?

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