My ex tells the CSA he has no money to pay them

June 22, 2009

My case closed on my son’s 19th birthday(in full time education).Well it should have closed but my ex had refused to pay the outstanding maintenance.

The CSA closed my case for 4 years 1994 as my ex denied paternity.

They have then repeadildily allowed him to lie about his salary.

He seems to always be redunadant. In fact he was redundant for 2 years twice while buying his first home £250,000 and 2nd £550,000 with a £75,000 mortgage.

He says he earns so little that he get nil assessments.£19,000.

He told them he gave me my house and was allowed £12,500 off his payments, which is what he gave me towards my home.He has now taken me to court to regain that money with interest £53,000.

How can I have to pay him back twice.He was leagally represented in court and I could not afford it.So not only did I have to pay this money again but ended up paying his costs £10,000.

His arrears grew so large but the CSA said if he paid 6 months maintenance they would wipe out the arrears.Hold on, he is let off again, what am I supposed to use to bring my son up.

During this recent court case I asked him to provide his finicial statements which he did.The same salary as he told the CSA. He then paid the csa arrears from march 2006 in march 2008.

CSA case then closed.

Judge orders updates of finicial circumstances. This time a very different story. This is what I submitted to the CSA.

So although my case was officially closed I came into the 13month rule.My God did I have to fight to get that tribunal(contacted James Parnell and everyone in the CSA) and has my ex kicked of.

Now I have had the first tribunal and its been adjoured for the CSA, at the judges directions to find out about my ex’s tax code etc. Can’t understand why the CSA had not done this before.They even say his payslips were false.He refused and got away with being interviewed under caution.For the last 5 years they have not even known where he worked.Never investigated.

The court statements prove he really lied to the CSA but will the tribunal enforce an action.I fear as always the CSA are weak and will just give my ex a slap on the wrist.

If you know of anyone else who has been in this situation, could you let me know how their outcome was.

Briar Redgrave-Plumb
Exhausted mum of one son at university


  • sue baker says:

    My ex husband has diverted his income through his partner. I have been going back and forth to tribunals. It has cost me a fortune.

    The best advise i can giv eany one is this:
    1. Forget trying to ask the csa for help and just bring your children up as best you can.

    2. hand the kids over to the non paying resident parent and let them have all the ups and downs of raising the children, while you just have them every othe rweekend and can spend quality time with them

    The csa just does not work

  • Cheryl says:

    Dont give up. My ex earns over £60,000. He managed to pursuade CSA he had taken a drop in income to £12,000. He forgot to tell them the rest of his income was paid direct into his pension!!! Almost 4 years and two tribunial hearings later, I have the decision I have been waiting for, the SOB owes me nearly £12,000 in back pay! Even now though, there is a hicup and i’m back to writing letters, calling MP’s and making numerous calls. I will get this sorted.
    What I’m trying to get across is, despite wanting to give up many times, the thought of ‘going through it all again’ just think about your kids. This is their money you are fighting for. What ever the reasons you and your ex split up, they are half his responsibilty and he MUST pay his fare share. Keep going honey, DONT GIVE UP!!

  • David Mayres says:

    Wow…. bitter much!

    If it’s taken this long, why don’t you give up. I have seen many people like you in this situation that twist the story to the point of idiocy. I can guarantee 100% there are lies in this text.

    I know people are gonna ignore this as your all as bad as each other. But I laugh AT you. Its pathetic, sorry…. its really pathetic. I am the son of someone who has been through this process with a lying cheating ex wanting money… using a shit loophole.

    Your son is an adult… you don’t need the money now. Sounds like you need to let go and worry about your future… not your past.

    I am furious reading this. Furious. Sad sad sad person.

  • mehmehmeh says:

    My ex-wife has diverted her income through her partner. I have been going back and forth to tribunals. It has cost me a fortune.

    The best advise I can give any one is this:
    1. Forget trying to ask the CSA for help and just bring your children up as best you can.


    2. Hand the kids over to the non-paying resident parent and let them have all the ups and downs of raising the children, while you just have them every other weekend and can spend quality time with them

    The CSA just does not work

  • Briar redgrave-Plumb says:

    David Mayers. I feel this man has a real problem.I do not feel his comments are helpful or kind.
    This sort of comment leads to upset.Anyone involved in the CSA is already wound up and we do not need people like him airing their huge chip on their shoulder on a public site.Please ask him to seek medical help.

    I would be interested in the reasons he got to be so bitter.
    Maybe he should share those feelings, rather than critise those that are trying to get justice for their children against appalling odds

  • Tracey says:

    I also nearly gave up – it gets so frustrating and upsetting battling for what you believe is right.

    My child’s father has never paid any monies at all and only one christmas present since my child was born 3 yrs a go. I started CSA involvent only at the beginning of last year and still nothing. He has given up his well paid job of £60k a year to start his own business with he says only a few thousand a month payout. He is clever and has played the system – when he got the CSA notification that he had to pay he appealed the decision and it has taken over a year as he cancelled one appointment due to work commitments. He has not paid anything and the CSA have been unable to enforce it until the tribunal hearing!!! The CSA tribuanl though decided the decision held and the debt enforcement dept is supposed to be trying to extract the arrears and the monthly payments from him. The Dept enforcement dept have said it could take until Christmas before I get anything for my child as if he refuses to cooperate they will have to take him to court etc. I am just sick of it all, if he is that adamant that he will not pay do I really want his stinking money? On the other hand why should I have all the financial responsibility and he has nothing? Fed up with the system and men who abuse it…

    They said if he won’t pay then they will take legal action

  • jamie says:

    You need to accept reality , just because the decisions don’t go your way move on , support your son the way you claim to and not visit your self serving justification as a hard done by person.The truth is the truth get used to it and stop arguing from such a weak position , the law is the law , you need help and soon , may i recommend a stay in a suitable establishment or some form of counselling , you know what you say is are a liar!

  • princess says:

    I have read all the cooments here.

    I am currently going through the same thing i have a tribunal hearing on wednesday and i know i will win i have the proof and the evidence my ex owes me 5,000 he is self employed and he knows how to work the system. i know there are dads out there that get heavenly penalised but what the men have to realise those that dont support there children is making it bad for the ones that do. The sad thing is we didnt make a child on our own it takes too yes we broke up but that responsibility for the children should not stop. Yes i could give up but i choose not to its been a financial struggle but you know what if not for myself i hope other women will continue to fight for what is right.

    If you men out there are reading this remember it takes two to make a child and its sad to see all this bitterness you need to put your frustration behind you and play a role of a father and support your children.

  • Tabs says:

    I feel for you and your son. My ex has lead me on for 5 years and 8months. He stressed me out all through pregnancy, he allowed his mother to verbally and physically abuse me. He sexually abused me, he text me constantly drilling me about having affairs when he the one with the dirty texts of girls from where he worked… He did this as well while I was with my baby, trying to put her to bed. Id get around 30/40 text n if i did not text back he would call me and asks me WHY?
    he refuses to pay CSA, but can afford expensive gifts for her, he can seem to find money when I shuv things from school in his face??? how can he he aint working. Or is he???????

  • Sara says:

    Has everyone noticed that every person saying “move on” “you are so bitter” “the law is the law” etc are all male! Typical.

    My ex has 3 children. One to me and two to a previous marriage. Even when I was with him, his ex has massive problems getting him to contribute towards his 2 eldest children and he found out, funnily enough through other bitter males, that if he diverted his wages (he is self employed) and paid himself dividends etc the CSA would not be able to touch him. He did this and would happily boast to anyone who would listen about how clever he was and that “they” meaning the csa, could not get a penny out of him.

    Well he is now doing exactly the same against my daughter. Have just got off the phone with with the CSA who basically told me not to waste my time trying to put a case through them as the burden of proof (inconsistent lifestyle and diverting monies) is firmly on my shoulders and not theirs!!!!! what the hell???

    He can afford to buy his gf’s son a car and put it through the mot, buy a caravan and site it for the season every year, go on holiday (and make veiled threats about taking my daughter and not returning) but when it comes to giving me something to clothe his own flesh and blood he suddenly goes deaf and mute!

    I love my daughter with all my heart but not a day passes when I don’t regret that she shares her DNA with such a selfish, mean waster!

    The CSA DOES NOT WORK! I am not even going to try. I will just bring my daughter up without his “help” and let her find out for herself, when she is older what he is like…I know I will win in the end when she finally see’s him for what he really is.

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