Categories
CSA Help

CSA demands money for dead, disabled son

21 March 2013 by Graham Best

I sent the CSA my payslips after a pay rise 3 years ago. I pay by direct debit so they can alter the amount taken easily. within a week of sending my payslips in they were returned with a compliment slip. my payment was never increased but as i had supplied the information i assumed my contributions were correct. just before christmas last year my son who was disabled and unwell could not recover from surgery at Great Ormond Street Hospital, he spent a month in intensive care but we hit a wall, they couldn’t save him.

He passed away in a side room with myself my now partner and all the ex-wifes family with him. At the end of january I recieved a phone call from the CSA opening with sorry to hear about your loss, however we now need to close your account, you owe £2103.00……. I was knocked to the floor, i had just started to deal with my loss just getting to grips with life again, now this. I eventually sat down and wrote to the CSA, I cried as i wrote it as i shake now typing this.

What do I do I have to pay this, its not my fault, my son wont benefit from my payments anymore, Its crazy what will happen to my money? please help me.

89 thoughts on “CSA demands money for dead, disabled son”

  1. I have read some horifying stories about the csa, Your situation knocked me to the floor, I think its absolutley disgusting in the way that you have been treated, No compassion what so ever from the infamous CSA, I would get your MP involved, i would also make a formal complaint in writing, I honestly do not see the point as to why the CSA have to continue to ask for money, Especially with your circumstance.
    I am sorry to hear of your loss,

  2. Not publicised by the CSA but sorry to here this sad tale, If your ex has anything about her she can inform the Agency she does not want this collected, The CSA do not tell you this, If your ex insists you pay, go to your MP and write to them stating that you wish to formally challenge this.

  3. This story is such a sad one, do the CSA have no compassion for the fact you have just lost your son, they are gisgraceful, personally you don’t owe them a penny now, and if anything they should be owing you a massive apology, seriously you need to complain, don’t let them get away with it, your grieving for your son and then they ring and knock you down with yet more demands

  4. Its all about the money.

    How utterly sad. If your ex wife insists on payment through the CSA she is just as morally bankrupt as the csa themselves. Your ex may still have bills to meet from your son but this could be sorted by sitting down and going through the bills as adults, as parents.

    Please find the strength to take this further if they do not relent.

    Hugs to you

  6. Complaint to David Cameron diect (copied to appropriate others) should be made. He lost a disabled son & at least would understand the grief involved. How would he have felt to have had his period of grieving so ruthllessly intruded upon.
    It’s impossible to get across to Mp’s etc the absolute day to day misery the CSA cause to families. Maybe, sadly, this is an opportunity to get Cameron to show at least a little empathy.

  7. Graham,

    I’m sorry to hear of your loss.

    When did your case with the CSA commence?
    What dates did the arrears accrue ?
    Was your ex in receipt of benefits?

  8. Graham, first of all I am sincerely sorry to hear of your loss and I can genuinely say i understand your pain and grief.

    In respect of the CSA issue I would suggest that you contact the agency and establish if the money outstanding is owed in arrears to your ex partner or if this is owed to the Secretary of State (this would only be applicable if your ex partner was claiming benefit pre 2010). If the money is owed to your ex partner the agency will collect this on her behalf if it is her wish, if she does not wish the money to be collected then she will need to contact the agency to inform them that she does wants the arrears to be suspended or written off (there was recent change in legislation that allows a PWC to request debt be written off).

  9. @ Alice , it reads his son passed away last year my goodness, the arrears are owed to his ex, why you felt the need to comment on here and tell him you understand his pain is beyond me, shocked is an understatement

  11. Not the point, losing a child nobody can begin to understand unless they have been through it themselves!!!!!!!, if she had read the post it gave the answers,

  13. just before christmas last year his son passed, she asked about arrears were they owed to his ex or sos, the post gave the answers, the arrears were owed to his ex

  16. lisa:- And she offered a solution it it was owed to the ex.
    Your prejudice blinds you and as always you insist on having the last word.

  17. @ Wilf, unless you have ever been through a tragedy such as losing a child you cannot begin to understand what he is feeling, Its not about being prejudice as you claim, its not about having the last word in this particular situation, its about having compassion for somebody when you know exactly how they do feel!!!!!!!!!!!

  18. I cant see any reference in the OP that states ‘the arrears were owed to his ex’ but Graham does ask ‘what will happen to my money? please help me.’

  20. As you have kept the CSA informed of ALL changes in circs AND been paying by D/D at all times, then, if there are any arrears then the CSA are at fault for not collecting/changing the amounts, ultimately this is THEIR problem and not yours, maladministration springs to mind.
    It was also very distressing for you to receive such a demand bearing in mind all that you had recently gone through.
    When you feel up to it, I suggest that you make an appointment with your MP and have the CSA not only offer their most sincere apologies, but also to wipe out the alleged arrears due to their mistakes and errors.

  21. lisa:- Yes it is about being prejudice.
    What ever Alice says you will seek to denigrate.
    How do you know she has not suffered a similar tragedy?
    You do not know, you are again making assumptions about somebody you do not know.
    Because she works for the CSA you seek to undermine everything she says failing to realise the insight she provides to the inner workings of the CSA which may give many clues to people in working their way through the complex rules and procedures.
    I myself have learnt a lot from her posts and gained some insight into the inner workings of the CSA.

  22. As Grahams post clearly does not claim the arrears are owed to the PWC, then surely it is correct for one to establish who arrears are owed to?

    Unfortunately Grahams son will no longer personally benefit from the recovery of any arrears, regardless of whether they are owed to the SoS or the PWC or both . But depending on who they are owed to, will determine what can possibly be done, if anything, regarding such.

  24. wilf, my last post states about.compassion, I actually do know how the poster feels, and like I.said unless you.have been.through this you will.never know, but again im.only being prejudice, bullying on your behalf springs to mind, poor guy still being hounded regardless of who the arrears are owed to,

  25. There should NOT be any arrears, lets not forget here, the CSA were kept informed at all times, they had a method of collection in place AT ALL TIMES, the amounts could be changed AT ALL TIMES, if anything is owing, then it is due to Agency neglect NOT the NRPs’ neglect, where does any fault lay if there are arrears?? Not hard to work that one out.

  26. lisa:- Your implication was that Alice was not allowed to offer sympathy.
    Why do you not like when people talking straight to you and accuse of bullying when your tone and language is so much more base and abhorrent.
    You had a go at Alice because she talked about resolving his arrears. Why?

  27. We do not appear to be privvy to enough info regarding whether any arrears had accrued prior to the DD commencing.

    Hope Graham will return and reply to the questions that have been asked.

  28. The arrears have accrued because the CSA were not quick enough getting the reassessment done when the poster informed them of his CofC.
    They only updated it when the case was due to close on the death of the QC.
    I agree with topper the poster should ask for these arrears to be written off due tongue circumstances.
    Possibly the quickest way would be through the PWC, although probably this is not uppermost in either parents mind.

  29. wilf, you can obviously establish a lot more than I from the OP…

    You may well be correct. However, there may also be older arrears on the case – until Graham confirms such I wouldn’t know.

  30. lisa:- Why are you shocked that somebody else can offer sympathy?
    Your post March 21st 2013 10:48 p.m.

  31. My intention in replying was to try to offer a solution to the gentleman who is suffering a great loss and will be grieving for his son. I am sorry that, once again, the mere sight of my name has resulted in this thread being sidetracked.

    Without being blatant about my own situation I would have thought the fact that I said ‘ I can genuinely say I understand your pain and grief.’ might have given a slight hint as to my understanding of what Graham is feeling, however that is not the point.

    The point is Graham has come on here to ask for help regarding the situation with the CSA and in order for others to be able to offer assistance some further details are required to clarify the matter of the arrears. I would hope that Graham will be able to re-post, but to be honest if I were he, after reading some of the replies early on in this thread I suspect he may give up and go elsewhere.

    There are a number of reasons why there may be arrears on the case, they may be prior to the CoC reported regarding the wage rise, they may have been accrued due to the agency not progressing the CoC when it was reported, they may be owed to the SoS or to the PWC. If they are owed to the PWC she may or may not want them collected. These are facts that still need to be gathered before the full situation is clear and constructive advice can be offered.

  32. Quote “I sent the CSA my payslips after a pay rise 3 years ago. I pay by direct debit so they can alter the amount taken easily. within a week of sending my payslips in they were returned with a compliment slip. my payment was never increased but as i had supplied the information i assumed my contributions were correct” unquote, this suggests to me that the CSA were aware of ANY or ALL CofCs and also, and yes i am reading between the lines here, quote “I pay by direct debit so they can alter the amount taken easily” unquote, so therefore the CSA were and are up to date with ALL info, so it still comes down to the Agency’s negligence if thee are arrears, why? Because, in answer to chall, if there were any arrears that had accumulated prior to the posting and unfortunate passing on of the child, then Graham would certainly have had some form of letter/s requesting that the arrears be paid within the 2 year steer, as Alice will confirm, which it would seem has not happened., because, quote “At the end of january I recieved a phone call from the CSA opening with sorry to hear about your loss, however we now need to close your account, you owe £2103.00” which would indicate no communication from the CSA.
    So, I stand by my earlier posting, the CSA are negligent, if, there are any arrears accrued, because they have had sufficient info to deal with this case!!
    My heart still goes out to both Graham and the mother of the child. Maybe there will be some-one at the Agency that will take a look at this particular case and say, sorry, we have fucked up, there are no arrears and is there something that we can do to assist you so as to make life somewhat less stressful.

  33. I agree that the most likely scenario is that the CoC re the increase in wages was not progressed when reported, this will have come to light when the death of the child has been reported and the case has now been brought up to date prior to it’s closure. Unfortunately if the arrears are owed to the PWC and she wishes them to be collected the agency are not allowed to ignore them.

  34. Thanks for you reply topper, but Graham has already replied and confirmed the situation.

    I am certainly not at liberty to elaborate on an individuals personal circumstances, however, I will confirm on this occasion that unfortunately bits you read ‘between the lines’ did not prove to be the position on this occasion.

  35. @ chall Did I miss the reply from Graham, or are you meaning that he replied to you directly?
    Its just that if the reply is on here, I best go and get my eyes checked out pronto!!

  37. It is also a valid question, why do the CSA not make you aware when arrears are discovered caused by them, That if PWC agrees these not need be collected or at a rate you CAN afford. would save a lot of problems for many if they did.

    Why would they withold this little gem as most PWC just want some contribution not a life ruined.

  38. If the WPC does not wish arrears owed to them the agency does make the NRP aware of this – arrears will be suspended and letters will be sent to both the NRP and PWC stating that the arrears are suspended and will not be being collected at present but that they may be collected at a later date if the PWC wishes them to be.

  39. But the agency does not inform the NRP of this do they? When they cause arrears they fail to mention this, Why would they withold this vital information and then insist on claiming back money the NRP has not planned or budgeted for placing them in debt and causing massive bad feeling throughout the family.

    As usual Alice you have answered a different question, to the one asked. Please answer questions asked not CSA like avoid them and answer the one that puts your lot in the best light.

    Fact CSA do not inform why would that be?

  40. Prior to 01/08/12 The CSA website stated CSA core principles, that they would make parents aware of all options open to them.

    No wonder they had to remove them. it is clearly a lie in this area regarding arrears.

    CSA now admit they do not currently work to any principles, No suprise there then.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *