Why do I have to pay for my son after he turns 18?
I was the main parent in my son life brought him up for 14 years with no financial support from his dead beat father. My son moved in with his father two years ago as his behavior mirrored that of his father. Both of them think the world owes them a living. His father is a over weight couch potatoe who doesn’t work sponges of the state to keep him in his luxuries. Works on the side delivery pizza’s (I suspect he munches most of them given his 26 stone weight. Last time I saw him I thought Pavarotti had come to sing!) & sub rents his council property.
I have paid CSA I like the other non residents parent don’t see him. Not that I want to after the last contact. I mistook him for a gobby thug. As he acted & look like one. I was told that I am liable to pay until he is 21 years of age. If this is true I think it is ridiculous. Are they not classed as adults at 18. I think it is disgusting how the system works. Why should I go out work full time to enable a waste of space to continue to sponge of society & live the life of luxury while I break my back. Where is the justice for the non resident parent it’s a joke.
I could really get on my soap box when it comes to these lazy good for nothing parasites.
25 thoughts on “Why do I have to pay for my son after he turns 18?”
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The only time absent parent has to continue paying for a child over 18 is if child is still in full time education .
But nt above a level studies
if your ex is as bad as you say which all mothers do anyway y the hell did you have a kid with him? you say your son lived with you until two years ago and he is just like his dad blah blah well you are the one who brought him up so u cant blame his dad for that really can you. no you dont pay until he is 21. slagging off his dad will only turn him against you like woman normally do about the dads yet mothers go mad if the dad says something nasty. you will now be stiched up by the csa end up in mega made up arrears by the csa just like all dads do yet the mums enjoy that so now its a mums turn. if your the nrp accept that nrps pay like all dads have too even wen the kids hit 18 and 19 yes thats true they are now legally adults but mums still love taking the money from dads and if it was the other way around would you say no to maintinance cos your son is 18? no you would not so stopp moaning and pay like everybody else has too by law. yeah true the csa are wanker fuck head scum bags who will destroy you stich you up ect just like a man trying to live his life sorry to sound harsh but thats life im afraid
probably for the same reason a father who cant see their kids because their mothers have gone out of their ways to make it as difficult as possible all their lives…then he is expected to pay for the privilege. It doesnt matter that the child/ren get everything they need, or that the mother has moved on and possibly living on joint incomes. There’s a body for collecting CSA arrears, where’s the body that upholds fathers rights and protects the bond a father and his children have? There aren’t any! Why? Because fathers basically have no rights to be a part in their childrens lives. There isnt even a law that guarantees their children will see their Dads. Maybe if he had those rights, your childs father might have had the courage to teach him right from wrong. Instead he’ll let the child do as they want. It amazes me that so many mothers bitch at a problem theyve created themselves…but then they have the family courts behind them, veiled in secrecy and blinded by their own egos. “In the best interests of the child”…yeah righto
You can pay until they are 20 once you involve the Csa monster it is impossible to get rid of it !
woah woah woah chris jones. This lady is now a NRP like the rest of us. no need for that is there? we need to stick together and be supportive of each other rather than start slanging comments like that. @mand, sorry but Chris is right that your in it like the rest of us. If your son is as lazy as you imply then he wont continue education so you should be ok. to some degree. but record every conversation with the CSA, tell them you are recording the conversation as well, if they dont listen call your MP. Its seems like the majority of case workers don’t care about anything except their bonus how ever you can find people who listen. remember what goes around comes around. CHIN UP!!
You have to pay because you have now changed from the PWC to a NRP (Welcome to the club) you will have to pay until they reach 20 years of age if they are in full time education
You can pay the csa a lot longer than 18 or 20 years old because when your case does eventually close all they’ll do is hit you with a phantom arrears bill dating back years.
The arrears on this will be large enough by the time you find out about YOUR PHANTOM ARREARS for them to nip down to see their buddy the judge and get a liability order on you for those phantom arrears.
The judge wont look at whether your paper work says you don’t owe the arrears he just looks at how much the arrears are for that the csa are there to collect and yes it WILL be high enough for to walk away with a smile on their face otherwise they wouldn’t of applied to the court for the liability order if they thought that it wouldn’t be granted
Trust me I know as I’m sure their are plenty others out there who’s case closed only to be hit with the phantom arrears bill which is purely invented by the csa, then they just phone the men in black yes the bailiffs who will be only to happy to take your money whether you owe it or not and if you don’t pay they just take your goods instead problem solved and they would have the nerve to charge your for taking them, yes their bad.
So I would forget about the 18 or 20 years old because when your case closes basically you just enter the next phase.
Here is one for all you out there I’m in the process through my M.P of closing my case all together as I’ve already done the case closed then the phantom arrears bill with the liability order of course.
Only before I go I thought no I’m going to have my say first so through my M.P I basically mentioned that its amazing after having been on line and read all your stories how many peoples paperwork disappears/how many people have phantom arrears/how many people are told no need to go to court as they have the liability order as obviously they can be predicted/and how many people whose payment went up obviously creating arrears, and when you question it your told you were notified yet none of us have paperwork or knowledge of any increase
Received the first part of my reply off the csa which states that they have noticed that I am concerned about about errors that you say have occurred on your case so the the c.s.a still call file fixing errors but cant wait to read the next letter I receive of them that should be entertaining.
leon harris>> your right on the nail there…
In response to your reply. Firstly when I had a child with this man. I didn’t know he was a nut job mistakes do happen. I entered into a marriage with the expectation of having a varied lifestyle I’m not stupid enough to think life is a bed of roses.
In the years I brought up my son it was hard work you don’t know my case & I ain’t going to bore you or defend myself with the details. What I will say is I never had a penny of that man. And I happen to agree why should you pay after a child is 18. He is old enough to drink drive get a job? I pay Csa however why I pay after he is an adult????
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Hi – again this information came from the NACSA website… no in force yet but hopefully will be in the near future… 🙂
A discussion as to whether a 20 year old person could be considered a “child” took place on our facebook page, https://www.facebook.com/CSAhelp where the consensus was an objection to the definition of a “child” as opposed to the actual decision to increase the time for which maintenance was payable. Support was given to the idea that after a certain age child support should be paid to the person directly, and not the PWC.
@ Derek miller to Chris jones
Come on Chris..you remarks at this lady are harsh and uncalled for.As Derek said she is a Nrp like us and just because she’s a woman and ex pwc don’t mean she don’t deserve the same respect and sympathy. You are judging her because she’s a woman….the dreaded ex pwc.
I wonder if she had been the man in this case and the fat slob at home…the woman ( pwc) ? I bet he would have your whole backing and sympathy then?
It’s the CSA we all hate because its unfair and destroys life’s.
Gonk
Gonk
If this woman is getting problems from the Csa she deserves help but if she was the one who got the CSA involved even for 5 pounds a week I have no sympathy for her but if her ex gave nothing for 14 years and now because he has the big CSA stick and is using it then he is a parasite !!!!
Macon
I see entirely what you are saying…but my point to Chris was the fact he’s just discriminating because she’s a woman and ex pwc and had she been a man, same scenario ,he would be totally on his side.
Gonk
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If you have shared residency order, do you have to pay the CSA?
ooooooh Sally maintenance paid to an adult should be choice…….. why should a parent pay to support somone who is old enough to get married drink, watch adult content films the clues are there….. Support should be paid for children I am not condoning non-payment but at the point where my kids are old enough to go to work I would not willigly give them cash unless they earnt it…. education if i could i would support them all the way…. however lets look at a 16 year old can leave school, get married with consent live on their own or with hubby and kids (not what i want for mine either) and your gonna pay for another three years….. Its bloody outrageous. By no means am i saying i won’t support my children but it has to be in context, they also need to learn responsibility.
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@ Eddie… I completely agree with you, 16 years old is fair to me… I left school and gotta job, I worked two jobs when I went to uni because… It was the way I was brought up… You work for what you have… The government is breeding a generation of spongers (greedy PWCs) that teach their kids to stay at school (but not attend, as is often the case as we have seen by lots of NRPs on here) or go into ‘non advanced education’ so that they (the greedy PWC) doesn’t have to work and continues to get money for nothing!!!
It’s highly unlikely that the CSA will reduce the age back to 16, 17, 18 or 19 because they make so much money.. maybe it’s better to go to the person the money should be spent on??
Not ideal but slightly better than to a sponging ex??
I would rather give my kid the money from 16 years and onwards as I think this would help the kid budget in life with for example paying board and it would let your kid know where the money comes from and then it would be appreciated !
Macon’s with regards to your comment that you would rather give the money direct to the child after the age of 16, a lot of NRPs share this view, and it is actually possible to have CM money paid direct to the QC’s bank account (even before they reach the age of 16) but only if the PWC is in agreement – from reading previous comments by you I suspect it is unlikely that your ex would agree to this.
If the child is resident in Scotland, there is also the option for the child to make their own application – off the top of my head I can’t give details of what is required (never had to deal with a QC application case as they are very rare) but as afar as I know the child needs to be living independent of the PWC.
Alice
My ex is a benifit cheat the Csa know this the HMRC know this and she is paying it back at probably 5 quid a week but the Csa said as she still revived child benift I still had to pay over 3 grand embezzled of me and you wonder why I hate the Csa it goverment organised theft ,the Csa encourage child benifit fraud because the PWC gets to pay it back at 5 quid a week and they get to keep at least 15% of the NRP wage packet for doing this .
The Csa need a radical overhaul with the kids put first and the NRP right to a quality of life without threats or intimidation from untrained Csa workers !
Gary…. I always love reading your comments. Everything you say is so very true.