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CSA Advice

Trapped into fathering a child

Hi i have been living in Greece and we lost our father in june2009 so i came home and ended up seeing a girl and she told me there was no chance of her getting pregnant she had loads of tests and so on. Well i told here that’s good cause im not one for kids, never have been, just want to travel the world.

So one day she rings me and tells me she is pregnant to my upmost shock i was gutted and was like so you lied to me all along?

She said no and i dont want you do anythin i have always wanted a 2nd child im very happy for you to go on with your life cause she understood about me and kids and life but as i got back from Greece i’m landed with CSA papers and her slandering my name all over social network site and locally im at my wits end what can i do???

15 thoughts on “Trapped into fathering a child

  1. Go back to Greece? The CSA can't touch you there! Stay in the UK and take responsibility for your child? Sorry mate, if them's your little sperms you put em there.

  2. do you know the phrase 'it takes two to tango', basically, if it is your child, why not gain the respect for yourself by takin your share of the responsibility,it would make you stand out from the crowd…………

  3. My son is in the same situation. His daughter has just turned 2, there is no getting away from it trust me!! I hope you have good friends and family to talk to because it is a nightmare emotionally and financially x

  4. If I hear the term 'trapped into having a child' one more time I might actually scream..it's the biggest load of rubbish ever uttered!

  5. It does take two to tango but unfortunately only one to lie and then the female gets what she was after and as for the male…..It's a big decision to become a parent and every human being should have the right to choose in my opinion, your only crime was to trust someone….

  6. sorry mate, its called 'procreation' the clue is in the word. put a bloody sock on it in future… no sympathy ere. you made a LIFE now you are half resposile for that life. nuf said ….

  7. You were trapped into taking a risk not into having a child, you still had a chance of risk of STI when not putting a sock on it!!!

  8. Actually they can touch you, even if you don’t live in the UK. There are a set of countries they are allowed to follow up in… :S

  9. My husband was in your shoes. He had a one night stand with a woman who was desperate for a child and lied in the process. Whilst he shouldnt have been so silly not to bag up he was tricked weather you like to hear it or not! 2 years she contacts saying her son wants to meet his dad! He asks for a DNA test and she refuses as she had slept with 3 more men during that space of time!! Finally the CSA bring both parties together for the DNA Testing and it finds out he is the father! She stopped all access and wanted him to have nothing to do with her or her son, just the money! This went further, my family got targeted, windows put through and cars damaged by her brother and his mates…. Yet still unable to have anything to do with him. We’ve now written this off as a huge mistake in my husbands past. She gets the money each month and we hear no more about it…
    Not very fair there is it?! So yes, women are just as to blame in this situation. Police wouldn’t press charges against her family as it was classed as a domestic dispute! Love how we get no support or help during this at all.. They get £150 from us per month, we have two children of our own and in the current financial state, we cannot afford luxuries for them! but trying to argue with the CSA doesnt work for us, we get nowhere!

  10. Might I add, the one night stand worked out to be 4 months before we got together

  11. An interesting debate … My view is that having sex is materially different to trying for a child (either within or outside of marriage). Meaning that it is any childs right to have two consenting partners as Mother and Father. The law focuses (correctly) on the rights / support of the child but the Mother has a vote although the Father has none – is this fair and how does this sit with equality in the modern world?

    Sadly some women (certainly not the majority) target men, usually wealthy for a financial ride to Motherhood with complete disregard for the impact on the life of others.

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