This whole thing has ruined my life – can anyone help?
i had a one night stand 2 christmas ago with a woman i use to go to school with, a drunken mistake that i have regreted ever since. anyways a week after she rings and tells me that she is preganant and the baby is mine.
I later on that day found out she had slept with at least 3 other men around the same time but they were all bums and on the dole and i was the only one she had slept with who had a descent job and money. i told her id want a dna test as soon as the child was born but i also gave her the option of termination because if the child was mine and she was sure then i would not want to have a child were i wasnt with the other parent because its just bringing another bastard child into the world, harsh it sounds but i know many people will agree with me on that,
anyways months went by i didnt hear anything from her so just assumed that she knew it wasnt mine and she wasnt going to be getting any of my money, anyways during last year i had a mental break down lost my buisness and ended up with nothing, march of this year i managed to get a minimum wage paid job and started getting my life back on track when i recieve a letter from the csa saying they are taking nearly £400 off my wages at the end of the month when i only get paid £900 a month, this would leave me after ive paid my rent and bills with around £60 to last me the entire month,
i contacted them and they gave me the presumption of parent crap, i told them i wanted a dna but they said i had to pay for one which at this current time im struggling to live never alone pay for a dna test, the best thing is 2 weeks before i recieved this letter i walked by the woman and the allegedchild in the street and she said nothing to me, so if i was the father of this child surely she would have said something!! but no shes just another benefit scrounger wanting more money,
i rang the csa and told them my current circumstances and they were not interested in the slightest, they said they were taking the money from source, so with no other option i walked into the office and quit, it was either that or work for nothing, struggling to keep a roof over my head whilst she has everything, i am now in major debt trying to do as much work as possible self employed,
i am stressed depressed again and struggling very bad all so i can keep out of the radar until they come up with another way i can prove that this child is not mine, please has anybody got any suggestions because this hole thing has ruined my life and im getting to the point where i cannot take it anymore
8 thoughts on “This whole thing has ruined my life – can anyone help?”
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Have had dnt test
??
Usually they first send u a letter to say that they have been contacted by the resident parent regarding maintenance for a child and on the form is a question asking you whether u agree that the child is yours or not, I’d ring them and just say straight out the child is not yours, it is then down to them to prove , I’d also look for your local mp and get in touch with them or visit citizens advice
First things first fella is tell the CSA the child is NOT yours tell them you want a dna test as soon as possible, unfortunately you will have to pay for the test and it is non refundable from the hoar…..sorry i mean mother. You have fallen for the oldest trick in the book my friend don’t feel depressed about it, lass sleeps around, gets pregnant and then backs the best horse or sucker that she thinks is going to provide for her offspring, women have been doing this since the beginning of time. Lastly…next time don’t go hats off.
As usual in these cases, it appears that you are presumed guilty before innocent, in true CSA scumbag ways.
Go to your M.P. and inform them that you are being presumed to be the father without evidence. Ask your M.P. to stop the CSA taking payments until your either proven to be the father or not, via DNA.
If you think that you are being treated that badly, as for a free consultation with a solicitor, and if eventually it transpires that you are not the father and you have no liability whatsoever for the child, then make a whopping complaint to the CSA complaints dept and the Independent case examiner. You may also consider legal action against the CSA, and/or the woman who made the allegation of your parenthood.
Get everything in writing from the CSA do not speak to them on the phone. they are liars and thieves!
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never recieved no letter from the csa at all, and as for a dna test unfortunately ive fallen on hard times, work has gone down the drain and struggling to pay the house at the moment yet it seems like they want to take everything even the shirt off my back, they have me by the balls either pay for a dna test or take what money i have to live on which when im only getting probley one or 2 jobs a week isnt alot, just another reason for me to move out of this shit hole pathetic excuse of a country, if you want to work hard and have a normal life then your fucked in britain but if you want to be a parasite on society you get all the help you can want, pick up is up forsale passport in check australia in 1 months time sold everything i have so cheers for the comments and good luck people i am out of here!
Well u have been given shit advise from the above “no marks” that obviously don’t care or support their children. If u choose to take a DNA with the CSA, the CSA pay for it. If the child is yours, u will be expected to pay for the DNA test but u can pay this back or add it onto any arrears. If the child is not urs, u do not have to pay a penny for the test.