Supported ex’s kids for years

June 29, 2012

I have supported my husbands kids for 15 years! Now the oldest is a 19 yeaer old university drop out despite getting his fees for free!! He is 19 never had a job (part time) thinks everything will be given to him! This is because we paid £600 a month for two children! He got EMA £30 a week never had to work! Failed A levels but single parent family got on to a university course and now it’s oh I have to work cos he has dropped out!

Everything he had was due to CSA!! Our children will have to get a job at 16 to stay on at school! Thats fine we are 2 working parents but leads me to believe CSA continues feeding the benefit cuklture. He didnt have to work as Mother got all the money tax free, now she panics as we wont pay!!!

CSA just encourages people to stay on benefits for as long as they can!


  • Excityboy says:

    You’re dead right about that!!!!!!!!!!

  • Carol says:

    You are completely right. I do not know how they allow it. They want to end the benefit culture but having stupid assessments in place and allowing pwc benefits, maintenance etc. they are better off than someone in work.

    The only other side though is once the pwc no longer has a qualifying child what are they going to do if they are not in work, as benefits all stop, immediately!!!

    From what you have described I am sure your children will always know more of the value of money and appreciate alot more. People who have things handed to them on a plate do not often realise what they have had.

  • Excityboy says:

    My Ex clung on until the death. I paid my last payment on Monday..Whoopeeeeee!!..and I bet she’s in a panic now. She alienated my son from me who is now 19 with no job. I would like to help him further but her poison has made that impossible now. I believe in what goes around comes around but it’s very sad for the children who loose out because of an Ex’s bitterness and greed.

  • brett says:

    Excellent story Clare and so very true.
    Congratulations Excityboy. I’ve been a CSA “gold card holder” since this vile organisation was first set up in the early 90’s and have nearly 6 years of hell still to go through.
    The CSA already stitched me up with over £11,000 of made up arrears 4 years ago, but I’m worried that when the time is up they’ll want a final pay off of more made up arrears…….

  • Excityboy says:

    Hey brett.
    Thankfully I’ve never been hit with the spectre of arrears. Just in case though, I’ve kept every pay slip, every letter from them and every bank statement proving I’ve paid the correct amount over the whole term. All because they may raise their ugly heads again when I’m in my 90’s…………………….How sad is that?

    I hope your 6 years pass quickly for you.

  • brett says:

    Excityboy… Thanks for your comment but what I can’t get my head around is the ficticious arrears the CSA make up. I kept all the paper work and paid every month and then 4 years ago they rang to say they had reassessed me 6 months previously and back dated the payments almost 4 years. They then issued a DEO. Whats to say they won’t do the same to you or me in a few years time ? Whatever you say they just take the money.

  • Excityboy says:

    brett………..This is something I have read about on here many times. Although I believe every ones version of what has happened to them, it still baffles me as to how it happens…….Maybe I’ve just been lucky.

    I don’t see how someone can be reassessed for more money if they are following the rules and keeping the CSA informed of increases in income when they happen.

    Request your data file, as far as I know it costs £10 but may be well worth it in your case. It should explain in detail as to how they came up with your arrears. If you can prove you were paying the correct amount with pay slips and bank statements you should be refunded. Everyone on here seems to give the same advice of writing to their MP. Once you have your proof, send it to him with a snotty covering letter about the theft of your money.

    Hope you have some success.

  • brett says:

    Excityboy.. Many thanks for advice. I did see an independent CSA adviser at the time who told me the “arrears” were correct. He stated the government had given the CSA power to do this and admitted as I was in a professional job and PAYE , I was a sitting duck for them to target.
    I also saw my MP but was so stressed up with it all, perhaps I didn’t present my case too well.
    I will request my data file and give it another go.

  • Excityboy says:

    Hi Brett…..

    Again, I am only going by what I read on here but the more experienced posters all say that reassessments cannot be back dated beyond the time they were done. So, the way I understand it is if you were reassessed 6 months ago then they can only back date what you supposedly owe to that date.

    If I am wrong then someone please jump in.

  • chall says:

    The effective date for a case to commence can not be before the date the agency initially made contact with the NRP.

    A reassessment can be backdate to the date it was requested.

    If an error is spotted on a case OR information was withheld and becomes available, the agency can correct and back date such.

    chall ~ afairercsaforall

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