Partner pays ex for child buy pays for all of his clothes too

August 30, 2012

I am making an enquiry on behalf of my patner. He has a son of five who lives “permanantly” with his mother. However, the child comes to stay with us a minimum of two nights a week and all week during the school holidays. I calculated this at 160 over night stays a year (probably more). At present my partner pays £50 a week to his son’s mother.

She does not however use any of the money to buy the child clothes and/ or personal items, instead it is expected of his Father and I to do so.

It angers me and my partner (who both work full time) that the childs mother claims to be a single mother (thus claiming child tax credits amongst other benefits), but lives with her new partner and their baby. I am thinking about reporting her for benefit fraud to the local council authority but then would we have to pay more a week towards the childs “upbringing” ??

I know I might sound like the wicked step mother but the money my partner pays does not go towards his sons upbringing, it makes our blood boil. Before overtime he earns £30,000 a year and has no other children. Please could you help us??



  • chall says:


    Have the CSA calculated the amount your OH should pay?

    Your OH could try putting his details into the CSA calculator to see roughly what the calculation should be.

    Once the amount for CSA has been contributed for the day to day living costs of a child, the non resident parent is under no obligation to make any further contribution for clothes etc, unless they choose to do so.

    If your OH ex is committing benefit fraud, then you should report her for such.

    chall ~ afairercsaforall

  • Alice says:

    is your partner paying via a case with the csa or by private family based agreement? If he is paying by private agreement and paying for clothing etc was part of the agreement then he has accepted the extra cost. If he is paying via the csa and he has overnight care of the child for the 160 days he will be entitled to a shared care allowance which would reduce his liability. If he is paying via a csa assessment and purchases clothing etc over and above his weekly liability then this is deemed by the csa to be of his choice and will not be off-set against his weekly liability.

    If your partner’s ex is claiming to be a single person but has a partner and child living with her then she is committing fraud and should be reported.

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