My ex’s lies have left me with a massive debt

March 31, 2014

CSA say i owe 45000in arrears because my ex lied to claim one parent benefits when we were living together, . my son is nearly 22 and they have done an attachment of earnings to take 175.00 a week.

I have tried everything i can to get csa to listen to me but the take mothers side. they told me that from 92 my partner at the time claimed that we lived together but wasnt a couple so apparently in 93 they came onto me for csa this was calculated at the highest rate, i didnt no anything about this untill 98/99 when we finally seperated an made attachment for 160 a wk from my wages sum of which was for arrears they said i owed.

I tried to dispute that i never recieved letters from them i have had a long battle and at my wits end my health as deteriated due to the pressure i am under.

I have a 12 yr old girl with my new wife and we are struggling my marriage as virtually ended because of the stress, i need to get this sorted.

How can they force me to pay when i lived in the same house as my partner and son and paid bills and provided for them both, we even shared the same bed and had sexual relations, we used to socialise with our neighbours and friends and these people have said they are willing to provide statements that we lived very much as a normal couple/family but csa said its not proof .

When we finally split she gave melittle contact and turned my son against me, he is 21 now and refuses to see me.

She had numerous boyfriends living with her whilst on benefits and now has a job and claims tax credits as a single person.

I opened a business in 2004 my exs idea was because we always rowed when in contact she suggested she would send my son for her money every week. then suddenly i get csa letters saying she stated i had never paid so they added on more arrear, then she changes it and says yes he did pay but paid it to son as pocket money obviously she knew the system.

Can i take her to court or something for her lies?

I cannot carry on like this i have had nothing but stress and hassle from the csa for 16 years, i am quite willing to pay money i genuingly owe but not for the periods my ex lied about. but upto now i cannot get any one to force the csa to admit u cant make a man pay when he was living in the same house.

Comments

  • jo says:

    I would see your mp on this one. Csa will tell lies, if you have proof you were living together ie electoral register etc that should work in your favour. How do you prove you were or weren’t in a relationship whilst living together, I’m pretty sure csa would not solely act on the pwc say so else we’ll all be able to do it…in my book it’s called fraud!

  • Scooby1411 says:

    I wrote to my Mp who wrote to csa, all that came back was they understand couples can still live together an not be a couple. So basically mp did nothing. I sent in electoral register records csa said that don’t count. I even challenged on the fact that they haven’t recalculated the fact that whilst living with my son I had contact with my son more then 52 times in a year so maintenance should av dropped anyway. I told them that I have contacted ex neighbours an they are willing to write statements as proof we were a couple and socialised together with these people but again csa refused to accept this. They are missing the point that wether we were a couple or not I still lived in a 2 bed roomed house slept in same bed as mother and provided for mother and son.

  • jo says:

    But csa covers cost of living expenses a child will need ie heating, food etc and if you were living there then these costs would of been met….I would appeal and see your mp again. How can she prove you were not a couple and you say you were….challenge them on those grounds…they’re basically saying her word is above yours which is blatant discrimination based on gender. Best of luck.

  • jo says:

    Also you can throw at them that you had shared care as the child living at your address especially with overnight access….how can she possibly say you didn’t? Was the child living upstairs with her and you downstairs and you didn’t cross paths, the claim is ludicrous!

  • Scooby1411 says:

    Jo I will challenge them on that too. Thanks.

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