Lied to by girl and now CSA on my back
Some women disgust me. Where is the mens human rights? I thought this country was about equality. Hello no, one rule for one, one for another.
Here the start of my story.
Hey guys, I will try to keep this brief as possible.
I’m a 23 year old male, working full time, with the love of my life and expecting a child in february and hopefully getting married.
The problem I have is that last november I knew a girl a little (19 yr old) slept with her (she is a psycho) two times with no condom (stupid I know) we got on well at the time and felt I could trust her. She said she was on the pill (then found out she was lying from her mother) and was told she couldn’t have children, now guess what she has had a child and apparentlyit’s mine and is now getting hold of the CSA.
Before people slate me, I want to elaborate,I want nothing to do with her, or her child. It wasn’t likeI risked it, even though I kind of did, I trusted her with what she said and she knew we weren’t serious as well.
I’m happy with my current relationship and I was excited for the future until this girl rocked the boat.
I don’t think she knows my date of birth and she definitely doesn’t know my last employers or my address.
I earn around £1300 a month after tax.
I’ll be paying the rent and bills when my mrs’s’ goes on maternity.
£700 rent and bills £120 travel to work a month £200 a month back to a family member because they cleared my credit card debt we agreed this. £100 a month for my mobile contract and gym contract.
total of = £1120, left with £280 for the month.
WITHOUT food
without providing for the child I’m so excited for with the woman I will marry.
Some will slate meu, but I hope some understand my position.
I’m wondering what can the CSA do to me and how much can they take? Will they take into account my child I’ll have to provide for with myself living even a little too.
What can the CSA do to me and what/do I have any rights?
Also I can’t be on the birth certificate can I? As I wasn’t present.
If I was with her, then we broke up I’d pay and man up, but this situation is different.
What I find appauling is the fact young girls do this to guys on purpose just so they don’t have to
8 thoughts on “Lied to by girl and now CSA on my back”
Leave a Reply
Hi Chel,
Well not that you will get slated but you should have worn a condom. You have an equal responsibility to wear protection (even if she said she was on the pill(.
If you are earning £1300 a month you will be looking to pay this girl £195.00 and 15% of any bonus you earn plus 15% of any future salary you earn until the child turns 19 or finishes school and goes into a job.
If she has approached the CSA they will keep that claim open and the money will already be starting to total up. That £280 you have spare… i’d seriously start putting it to one side ready for when the CSA do track you down.
When CMEC gets fully bolstered next year your only way out might be to emigrate to a country that does not have any arrangement with the UK.
Seems a shame but unfortunately you will now need to give up £2,100+ of your earnings every year to this girl.
You slept around? With a pyscho? You didn’t use a condom? Have you heard of STDIs?
Sorry but…..
Well,im sorry but are you really expecting people to have sympathy with you?…coz im afraid I dont…apart from the fact you trusted the word of someone you barely knew..(and admitted she was ‘psycho’….nice!)…that she was on the pill,why the hell didnt you still wear a condom for your protection against the many stds ?its easy to say ‘stupid I know’ now…but now there is an innocent child being brought into this world,made by two people…not one…..sorry but you are just gonna have to suck it up and provide for this child…maybe sacrifice a few of your luxuries ay?…. Like your contract mobile phone and your gym membership,because trust me,you will not get away from not providing for this baby…and neither should you….doesnt matter how much you bleat on and feel trapped into this,at the end of the day we are all responsible for our own and this is the result of you not being…..
….and im sorry but ‘it wasnt like I risked it’????? Just how naive are you???
“Before people slate me, I want to elaborate,I want nothing to do with her, or her child.”
HER CHILD?
Your decision to have sex.
Your decision not to use a condom.
Therefore you become a father of YOUR CHILD.
So who should pay for your child?
Taxpayers who are reading this?
I have just taken in a stray dog.
Should the state pay for its upkeep?
Angie hit the nail on the head!
Question, Chel…if there was a male contraceptive pill would you have taken it?
Some of the replies to this question are nothing short of disguisting.
The ‘should have worn a condom’ line is getting old and is wearing a bit thin, on top of the fact it is a poor argument anyway.
Let me give you some direct and indirect comparatives, I tell an unprotected woman that I am wearing a condom, however, wanting a baby I poked a hole in the condom with a pin. Said woman falls pregnant against her will. I then start taking steps to stop the woman from having an abortion and blocking adoption essentially forcing the woman to have a child she does not want. Under the multiple posts above logic it was the womans fault for not taking the pill in the first place or the blame is equal. “I have no sympathy for the woman as she should have been taking the pill”
An old man is approached on his door step by a scruffy looking young man who is offering to relay the old mans patio for only 25% of the usual price. The scruffy man presented no identification, was not wearing work ware and wasn’t driving a work van, however the old man falls for his sales patter gives him his savings and the scruffy man does a runner. Again on the logic presented above it would be the old mans fault for falling for it even though deception is clearly used.
Now some people will tell me this is not the case and these situations arn’t comparable however the first situation is clearly the male version of a woman forcing a man to have her child against his will, except the law is on her side.
By a male not wearing a condom does not make responsability equal… Example…
A woman can to avoid having a baby… Abstain, use the pill, mini pill, morning after pill, female condom, ask you to wear a condom, have an abortion, put up for adoption, diaphragm, injection, implant, patch, tubes tied, vaginal ring… The list goes on.
A male to avoid having a baby can… Abstain, Wear a condom, have a vasectomy.
As provided for you in writing it is clearly not an equal process and those who say it is are stating prehistoric views and ignoring the facts.
Any woman who forces a man to have a baby against his own will should not be entitled to a penny. Males should be educated from a young age about the dangers of women who will do this to males (as young women are tought about the dangers of being raped).
Gender equality is still massively in the favour of men however in the case of family law it is completely the opposite. I don’t agree with runaway fathers however I think this doesn’t qualify as a runaway father. A runaway to me is someone who had made a commitment and was knowingly and willing practising unsafe sex before his partner (sexual and/or emotional) got pregnant and he got cold feet and did one. Baby trapping is the most disguisting thing a woman can ever do to a man.