It should be recognised that some parents work hard

August 31, 2013

I think the problem is there are parents who’s relationship has broken down and can no longer communicate vs parents who do not wish to provide for their children. I am the girlfriend of a man who has been the RP of his child since he turned 2. He paid the CSA every month on time.

Before he became the RP, we had access almost every weekend until one day he went to collect his son and she had moved across the Country somewhere without telling him when or where. He did not see his son for 4 months until one day she rang and said she could no longer look after him (got tired of having to stay in every night/weekend) he then became the RP and she did not try to contact us to see their son. Fast forward to present day and we are still no closer to receiving any of the thousands of pounds she owes her son. We have told her the payments are linked to her sons savings account, after all we may struggle everyday with affording food and clothes but we are managing. She still refuses to pay.

So, in answer to your question, you are being criticised because the CSA make the promise that they are fair and are there to help provide for your children. This is not the case, they change rules, constantly make mistakes and still when my boyfriend rings ask him how HE makes his payments and where does HE work. When he can’t answer these questions (because its obviously impossible in CSA land for the father to be the RP) he is told he had failed the security checks.

We are one of the lucky ones. We get to see his son, whom I have raised from being 2 months old, every day for the past 7 years. Some parents don’t get 7 minutes and for that I am truly sorry BUT I don’t like to see them commenting on every post things like get a job etc, it should be recognised that SOME parents are the RP and work every hour possible. I also know that there are a number of parents that go out of their way to stop children seeing the NRP. For those who don’t see their children, please don’t tar everyone with the same brush.