Is there a way not to pay CSA?
September 9, 2014
I’ll be honest i’m not a mum i’m a dad and i’ve come on here after searching how to get out of paying CSA.
Before you burn me at the stake hear me out, i just noticed most people seem to be hating on the dads etc but not ever situation is the same. My ex who i’ve been with since 16 until this year left me for someone else, we have 4 kids and i was kicked out as the house was in her name on the council.
For years i’ve paid all the bills etc but that didn’t seem to matter. I earn £1000 per month on basically minimum wage, we have 4 children and she wont arrange to settle the payments between us because her new fella doesn’t want her seeing me or something. (please note i’m not a tosser, i was never violent and always treated her with the respect she deserved. My only crime was spending too much time at work.)
Now she’s on social security or income support plus the DLA she gets for our youngest lad, housing benefits etc etc. Meanwhile i’m getting £250 a week and expected to pay £57 of that to her. I rent a crappy bedsit above a takeaway in Clayton and after paying the rent, gas, electric, water, council tax, food i’m left with pretty much nothing.
In fact i would be better off on JSA but then i’ll rot away in a bedsit never going anywhere or having contact with anyone but the jobcenter who will be trying to make me get a job that makes me worse of than on JSA due to CSA payments.
Adding insult to injury my ex refuses to give me regular access to the kids and i can’t afford to take her to court about it. So yes i was searching for a way out of paying, not because i don’t want to pay for my kids who i love dearly but because i can’t exist whilst paying it. I’ve come to the conclusion that the best way to escape it is to die…
Go self employed, do your own books, pay yourself “nothing”.
Emigrate
They can still get to you (if you’re male) if you move abroad. Some countries are easier than others for them to track you down, anywhere in the EU, Canada, America, Australia but if you never tell your ex where you are, they will never look.
Leave the country or go self employed.
Your fucked good advise from the other two people. If you do manage to find a way without going self employed or emigration let me know please.
Ben Wiskin I thought of that and so have the bastard casa they want to see your bank statements so if you got a mortgage etc ect then hour earning munney and they want it.
Sounds like a right bitch to me i really dont blame you feeling the way you do the only thing i can suggest is going self employed if that is possible or maybe go on benefits and go to collage to learn a trade to go self employed it would be hard but it is possible or even meet someone else but for the right reasons you sound lonely and thats never good when making decisions do you know anyone freinds family who you could rent a room off give you a chance to save some money but if that all fails or is not possible then yes going on the dole is the only option
If I was you and if you really care about your kids, I would look for ways to invest my time more efficiently with higher return, instead of complaining about earning 1000£. Your kids are your responsibility and hers, and you have to provide for them, so instead of finding excuses (which are not valid) I would find solutions. I’m amazed about the fact I have more manhood than any average men.
His reasons are more than valid and 1000 is not alot of money maintenance rent gas electric food plus money to takr kids out and buy them things its not cheap what planet do you live on i dont even know how you can judge him when you have never been in his situation. The mother has got the house the kids benefit money her rent paid for plus the kids money and a new fella and maintenance on top and she dont have to lift a finger are you saying thats fair seriously you have no idea!!!!
Oh and if was to spend more time working to get a bigger wage he also has to pay more maintenance dumb bitch!!!!
I agree 1000£ is nothing, and this is what I’m saying, I’m not judging I’m giving him some life advise, (FYI n.1 what he went through is not even 10% of what I had to go through and I’m a women, and I’ve stand back on my feet because I want the best for my baby rather than looking at ways to not pay) which is looking to provide a better life for himself and his kids rather than looking down. I’ve lived in China where some people would earn £300/m and would give half for their kids and cumulate jobs to provide more because the focus is the kids and their future than their life existential issues.
In life you have 2 choices 1/ excuses 2/ results, it’s just a matter of choice
Welcome to Manchester 😀 that’s what Manchester girls are like most of all 9-10 of the dole heads if I was u I’d go on jsa ud prob get the same amount from them with what ur working for now
and generally speaking I’m amazed that parents (regardless of what happened) are finding excuses and justifying the fact they shouldn’t pay for their own flesh and blood. Are people not aware that kids cost a lot of money and that they will study, go out, do activities, eat, get dressed, be fashionable, travel ect ect
the jsa route is a joke as well, you will get a nice letter from hm gov saying the minimum amount of money you need to survive on is £44 or whatever, then they take £5 outta that. some exs dont care about the money they just their x to suffer. with csa 3 now you shoudl be able to come to a mutual agreement or she has to pay as well!!
Sorry to hear of your issues but as a Dad in a similar situation I hope you will understand where I’m coming from with what I have to say. Firstly, and I think everybody, male & female will agree with me on here and that is that the CSA is not fit for purpose, and we all have our reasons for why we hate the agency so much. They don’t play fair, and unfortunately legislation has a lot to do with that.
As a father, I would never dream of not contributing to my children’s upbringing whilst I am working, and whilst I’d rather agree a sensible amount of maintenance with my ex, she would rather use the CSA as she can get more money that way and it’s another way of trying to get my children out of my life by plunging me into a position where I have nothing. But I have to rise above her inability to behave in a rational and adult way and stay strong for the sake of my children. So with little choice other than having to suffer at the hands of the CSA, I have to work with what I have, and that’s what you need to do.
It’s all about budgeting and sacrifices as a father. If you haven’t already done so, see what extra help you could get in respect of working tax credits if you are on a low income or help with rent if it’s high. If you have a contract mobile give it up and get a pay as you go, got sky TV ? give it up. If you bus or drive to work, get a bicycle (I cycle up to 400 miles to and from work a month). There are dozens of ways to lessen the amounts of money you need to pay out, but it isn’t the children’s fault their mum and Dad are not together. You need to do everything possible to see them. When my wife made me homeless I spent 6 months on a friends sofa, and only got to see my kids for a couple of hours a week. It’s heartbreaking, but I pulled myself together and now I rent a 2 bed flat and my children are with me 2 days and nights a fortnight. It’s nowhere near what I really want but it’s better than what I had. Fight for your children even if it means court. Represent yourself if you have to, if you are on a low income you may not even have to pay. If she is not allowing the children to see you then she is not acting in the best interests of the children and that in just another form of child abuse as far as I’m concerned.
It’s harsh I know but if you cannot afford to go out , then that’s the way it is, if you have your kids and have no money for presents at birthdays and Christmas, then yes it’s horrible, but as long as they have their father they couldn’t care less in the grand scheme of things that they don’t get anything.
Your children need you, do what you have to, to make sure they get their time with Dad. Be strong and don’t give up.
Fadela Seddini…you heartless cunt
gonk
Fadela Seddini…wipe that shit out your eyes and see this vermin the csa for what it really stands for…AND IT AINT ABOUT THE KIDS…..You fucking arsewipe grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
gonk
Benefit scrounger ^^^^
Cash is king mate 🙂
Funny you should say that, the twatwaffle that is trying to ruin my life is from Manchester too.
Just tell the CSA to get fucked!!
Well it says they live in Clayton haha only Clayton I know is nr me :p
i dont think you understand fadela he lives on his wage alone where as the mother gets benefits and the kids money and only has to pay for food and electric gas water
I think what everyone doesn’t understand its that children are a responsibility. You are mentioning benefits, but this is only valid in Europe, and for sure you ain’t gonna build a decent life by relying on benefit. Most of the countries in the world do not have such system, and the whole of a parent state of mind is wrong if they rely on state benefit. Every individual should rely on his own self and provide for their kids with no excuses whatsoever. At the end, the only thing I have to say is I feel sorry for a lot of kids in this world, and my daughter is lucky to have me as I’ll never fall into that “victim” state of mind and will always do evthg to provide the best for her, be it Time or Finance.
I reiterate, in life you have 2 choices, EXCUSES or RESULTS
What Jason Spurgeon has said on here is real wisdom. It is about thinking the long game and whatever happens, keeping the connections between you and your children and being reasonable with your ex no matter what.
It is a tough situation to be in but don’t give up.
Eventually, the children will grow up and they will see the truth for themselves.
Best of luck Dan.