I would rather have him watch her so I could work!

October 23, 2011

After breaking up from my partner I was relatively OK money wise, but I had a job that required me to work shifts.  At first my ex took our daughter on the two nights i had to do a sleepover shift, but pretty soon he had her calling me crying she was missing me.  I gave up that well paid job and tok a 9-5 on minimum wage a year and a half ago, and put in a CSA claim.  They calculated £19.71 a week, not very much but at least something. My ex is yet to pay 1 penny.

Then the out of school club I used closed down.  I now have no childcare and was forced to give up my job. I have registered as a childminder but am only earning about £100 a week at the moment.  I have a degree and management experience.  I could earn a really good wage for us if my ex would look after my child more regularly, help out during school holidays, etc, but he refuses and only has the minimum contact.

Surely it is his responsibility to look after her as much as it is mine? I would much rather have the help and support than the non existent £19.71 a week! Why isnt there legislation to make fathers do their duty? He is selp employed and says he has no work and cant pay, so if he has no work why cant he look after our child whilst I work?


  • Miles O'Brien says:

    He should be ashamed of himself. There are many dads out there who love to have the arrangement you are seeking. This is exactly what shared responsibility is all about. I’m sorry you’ve been let down. It’s men like him that brought about the CSA in the first place. He doesn’t want the responsibility and doesn’t want to pay!

  • Mick says:

    I know this will be of no comfort to you. The old saying about leading a horse to water springs to mind. He does have a moral obligation to his child that he doesnt want to share. sadly that cannot be legally enforced.Maybe you should cut off contact with him and your child until hes willing to get his head from out of his backside. It isnt fair on either you or your child. As a NRP i would give my right arm to have a PWC like you. My ex cut me dead in the water. Take comfort in the fact that 1 day, your child will see her father for what he is. It will be his loss, not yours.

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