I pay for my kids but cheating ex still went to the CSA

January 30, 2012

I have been seperated from my wife for nearly six years.

I left the marital home as i found out she was having an affair. We have two children together, 8 and 7 years old nearly, since i left i have seen my kids every single week for the past six years. I have them sunday night, monday and tuesday, i take them on holidays and also pay for everything they need when they are with me, be it school stuff or anything else.

My wife moved someone else into the house less than two weeks of me being gone, she is still with him and they have two kids together, i have not had a relationship for over 5 years as my two kids were my main priority, in may last year i got into a relationship for 7 months and in december when i got paid i found that CSA had taken over £350 pound straight from my wages?

I had no idea my wife had put in for a claim as i thought we had an agreemant outside of the CSA, i have had no letters or phone calls from anyone from the CSA to say this was happening, no corrispondance whatsoever in nearly 6 years, now the payment for this month has gone up to £534 and they are telling me i have to pay this up until the end of June, then £499 in July and then £246 there on, its a joke

How am i meant to live and carry on seeing my kids when she is taking all this money? The thing that annoys me is she can spend this money on whatever she likes, last month she bought a new I phone, people like myself that have stayed in the area becouse of my kids and have seen them every week of their lives and then i go and get stiched up like this, The CSA is a joke, what rights do we have?

What is the point in working when 40% of your wages goes to your kids mum just so you can pay the finance off on her car for her, where is the justice in all this, what can we do?????


  • chall says:


    The effective date for a case to commence is when the agency first contact the non resident parent, this can be in writing OR by phone.
    If you have received “no correspondence whatsoever” from the agency, then you should establish when and where the agency made first contact with you, as the address may not be able to be deemed as confident.

    Quote nick; “I had no idea my wife had put in for a claim…”
    If your ex claimed benefits prior to April 2010 the agency would automatically have become involved and your ex would not be in a position the have a private agreement with you. In this case most of any arrears accrued before April 2010 will be owed to the Secretary of State and not your ex.

    If the agency have followed correct procedure, have they used correct income info for you and does the calculation reflect the number of nights the children spend with you?

    chall ~ afairercsaforall

  • joanne says:

    We had this problem to, no correspondenc until the deo. We went straight to complaints and then to the mp, csa have admitted errors, yet we are still waiting for it to be put right. It’s not fair tho is it chall, these poor men who have clearly provided for their children, who pay their taxes for a benefit system get hammered again, and sod them if it leaves a new family in poverty.

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