I owe money because of their mistakes – how does this work?

The CSA are scamming me for the second time.

The first time around, they wanted £800 in back payments because of a change of circumstances. I got a new job, I informed them straight away about it. Somehow, despite me calling them every couple of weeks to urge them to hurry it along, it took them more than 6 months to recalculate what I should be paying, They told me to keep paying my usual amount in the meantime, and that’s where the back payment came from.

Surely this is their fault not mine? They charged an extortionate amount each month until the outstanding balance had reached zero. I told them that I could not afford this but they gave me some rubbish about it being their minimum rate. Anyway, a couple of years later and they are doing the same thing all over again, now that I have started a second job (I did so because I couldn’t afford to live off just the one job. By the time the bills were paid, and the food shop done, there was nothing left). This is bank work with the NHS.

Anyway, after they had calculated how much I should now be paying (after waiting until I had 3 months worth of pay slips to send in), I am still left waiting for a letter to tell me how much needs to be back payed. I have called them and tried to find out what the delay is but no-one can give me a justifiable answer. It is now another 3 months later and despite me nagging, I am still in the dark. Meanwhile, the longer I wait, the higher this bill is going to be. I also discovered through someone else that since I have a shared custody order for my child and have her for over a certain number of nights in a year, I should actually be paying less! I queried them on this and they agreed. They went to confirm it with my ex partner, and she denied it. I am now going to call them today and ask them what address I can send proof to (the court order, and my daughters school year timetable, and my own calculations). Even after I have done this, even though I should have been paying a lower amount for the last 4 years, and they have been informed about the specifics of the court order from the start, and have even had it sent in to them before, they have said that they won’t be reimbursing me in any way. This is completely one sided and despicable, especially since it was due to their own incompetency that they have misjudged how much I should have been paying from the very start.

If my ex and I can agree to handle payments outside of CSA, can all this be stopped? I had tried to handle payments by cheque before I got in touch with the CSA, but my ex just ripped them up in front of me, demanding cash in had instead because apparently having the cheque show in her bank account would affect her benefits. Hopefully this is not still the case, as the csa are extorters and I cannot give my ex cash as she has a tendency to lie in court and even accused me of never having paid my child before (this was quickly dispelled when I called the CSA and asked them to send me receipt of all my payments to them – I don’t know how she thought she was going to get away with that but hey).

Does anyone have any advice for me, as something seriously needs to be done! Thanks for listening.