I don’t trust the CSA to get my money

How much longer 🙁

I originally got in contact with the csa when my little girl was born 8 years ago because I was on benefits and back then I had to. The NRP was a student so didn’t pay anything for about 6 years, which is ok because even though he was getting quite a decent pay from different jobs aswell, the rules are the rules so I waited.

Last year I contacted the csa because I found out the NRP had been working for the past year but never bothered to tell me or the csa. I rang them in April 2011 and they said they would look into it…. which they didn’t, and it took another call in September 2011 for them to contact the NRP, they assured me that I would receive any backdated arrears upto the April (which I do think is unfair, but as he should of told them when he started work, hes got away with a year and a bit of working not paying anything).

He received the forms in November 2011, but it took him months for him to send them in and they stll were incomplete, and any assurances that they would do a check with HMRC didnt happen until recently to get all his payslips from his employer. In January the first thing he did was put in a financial hardship claim, which is again ok, if under their rules he is entitled to do that, but he took forever sending those in too, all for them to turn him down. And all the sudden he is saying he has her 52 nights per year (every fortnight for two nights).

They have sent us both letters asking for proof of care/ shared care. I filled mine in promptly stating all dates and was clever enough to use facebook to record all dealings with him, so screen printed all messages for the last year and a half. He has yet to send his in and has received an extension. He has never ever been close to having her for 52 nights! Last year he had her for about 13 in total and this year it is about the same so far (the csa appears to given him a slight kick up the bum) but as its half way through the year already, I dont see how he can suddenly have her overnight so it is 52 (he lives in a different area so she has to be with me for school days).

I’m just so angry that he and the csa are delaying things further and further, it has been over a year waiting! And I’m angry with the NRP for lying about something that clearly isn’t true. He has always put himself above his daughter, going away with friends, having a big social life, and splashing out on things he doesn’t need but wants, and tries to guilt trip me in going to the csa when I can’t afford to buy her a new bed which she really needs. All the money would be going on giving her a better life to her the things she needs and taking her to places or having her in clubs etc so she can thrive. I don’t understand why the NRP would be against that. If he had come to me before and wanted to an agreement that was less than the csa would want but was honest and responsible I would be happy, but in previous conversations he has said he would do anything to not pay a penny.

I’m just wondering how much longer I have to wait. The csa have told me in a couple of weeks I should get a letter saying whats happnening, but I don’t trust them. And I don’t trust the NRP to try more tricks to delay things.

Is there anything else he can do to delay things further? He is in a job he really likes so I can’t see him quiting.

Sorry for the long story!