How should I go about getting access to my son?

November 20, 2013

This time last year i was happily married with a beautiful daughter. I had just landed my dream job and after five years of trying my wife had just told me she was expecting our second child. i was over the moon.

On the 20th of November 2011,i answered the phone to a private number. It was the CSA! At first i thought my wife had left me,then after a while it become clear I was named as a father to a ten year old boy. i was in total shock as you can imagine.

I had been with my wife for 11 years, we did have a bad patch and we both had very short time with other people.(a few weeks at most) before we got back together and married.
Straight away i asked for a DNA test.

The mother agreed. Stupidly i didn`t tell my wife.

I couldn`t make the DNA test so they asked for wage slips ect.

I did not give them anything, and i still did not tell my wife.

A few months went by,I had taken my daughter out for the day when i arrived home my wife was sobbing. My mother in law took my daughter.

My wife showed me a letters from the CSA. Payments they wanted. It also showed the DOB of the child, it was the same day as my daughter,three years before she was born.
My wife was crushed. I know I should have told her,but I was still so shocked about it all myself.

My wife said she was leaving with our daughter and she would not be keeping our much longed for baby.

It turned out the CSA had sent the letters to my mother in laws house and in both of our names.

My question is how can I go about getting access to this child who will be 12 early next year? i have no details for his mother,i have tried to trace her via facebook and other means but have so far had no joy.

My marriage is over which deeply hurts,but on the other hand i have a child, a boy, that i have already missed nearly 12 years of his life. I need to meet my child but i have no idea how to go about finding him please help.