Going round in circles
I left my ex in 2000, he never gave me and my 2 boys a penny for over a year. i then decided to involve the c.s.a, they forced him to pay per month. everything was running smoothly till the 6 weeks holidwy. he stopped paying, saying i was only spending it on myself. when in fact i was paying for food, uniforms, treats and the usual sundrie things boys need. then he started paying weekly by cheques to the c.s.a, so he could claim it back in expenses. then when it was tottenhams end of season he used it{ the payments} to buy a season ticket.
At this time he also decided he was going to tell the c.s.a that he had been sacked . but to the surprise of the c.s.a he was in fact working on the underground. this held my case up some months as a new case had to be arranged by my ex and the csa, when after some 6 months, the money started to arrive in weekly payments by cheque via the csa again. without back pay?, then when my son returned to college in 2013 the money stopped again and my ex was orderd to pay 30800 popunds in backpay payments. my ex refused and was forced to pay via his wage payer. this again was fine for 1 month, my ex then persuaded the csa to accept a lower value repayment over a longer period which was accepted. my ex made 1 payment then stopped again as the csa started as a new department. so once again i still am out of pocket and my ex gets to buy a new house for cash. even after 14 years apart he still is bitter i left him, and the csa are run circles again.
Thankyou for reading this, but it feels good to say something about my hell? even though its just on black and white
13 thoughts on “Going round in circles”
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Have you worked in them 14 years ?
no im raising my children. as soon as they are independant i will get a job. why?
So if you left your ex in 2000 that makes your kids at least 14 maybe older and at school for many yrs. So why are you not working? To help out, why is it down to your ex to keep you? Help, he should I agree. So do your bit and get a bloody job,your kids are old enough and don’t need their arses wiped on a daily bases so much so that it stops you working. I know of mums that have kids way way younger and they work. You use the kids as an excuse not to work but expect your ex to pay. Maybe that’s why he messes you and the CSA around cause he feels you ain’t playing ball. You never said why you left your husband either. Why does he feel bitter? Maybe because he was dumped and had his kids taken from him through no fault of his own ? ..lots of question marks I know….because you expect sympathy perhaps but without telling the full story. Hell I am bitter myself, why shouldn’t I be when my ex walks out on me after 8 yr relationship and only married 9 months of it for a bloke she met on the internet and meets for a dirty wk end whilst her husband baby sits the kids. Then has salt rubbed in the wound by her taking my child away and then screwing me for cash each month for the privilege.
Gonk
Oh and you have no idea what hell is. Neither do I because neither of us have gone through or going through what some honest hard working fathers are going through because of this unjust,unfair system called the CSA. Some are desperate and can’t make ends meet from one week to the next, some lose their homes, some have no choice but to give up work to stop the relentless hounding for money by the CSA and ex. Some take it sadly to the very end And kill themselfs because they see no way out all because of this filth called the CSA and greedy money grabbing ex’s
Gonk
Yeah, could kinda tell you had not been working for the 14 years , just plain lazy !!
dear dave and gonk, what i didnt say for pride, was the fact the ex pushed me in front of a bus because he had a hangover, you gonk must have been just as bad after reading your comments, dave are you enjoying the lump in your thrioat? i would work if i could but i live my life in a wheelchair after my punishment, so yes gonk i live a hell every day, what are you bleeting like a little boy for? you must be hiding something, no body walks from someone for another unless yopu were no good or did you TREAT HER BAD? dave, whats youre pathetic exscuse for labeling me as plain lazy? i get up clean up, cook, wash clothes ,go to my boys school meetings, drive to a and b, live day by day hapily. as stated before i definately would work if i wasnt paralysed by my ex so please reread what ive written i havent atacked you both as a result of hate i realise we all have a problem your both men. im a woman are you both working? i wish i was.
oh, dave just to clarify looking after a disabled person alone is not easy, especialy as i survive on only my savings from my life previouse to my incident, and i refuse to claim benefits , and gonk i only want the ex to pay his rightfull pittance to his children. he earns 35000 pounds a year but cant pay anything to his children i dont need his money my boys are entitled to it? the same as both yours and daves
no im raising my children. as soon as they are independant i will get a job. why?
So how do you propose to do the above if you are wheelchair bound.
Yes i do work (full time)and have custody of my 12yr old daughter
dave i commend you but arent you bitter? im going to be a self employed sky diver, just because i have wheels instead of legs like i presume you have? dosent mean im a slacker whatever your situation is dosent entitle you to acuse me of being lazy. when your at work who cares, feeds, looks after ,and journeys your daughter? because i thought it was ilegal to leave a child under the age of 16?
She goes to school, i drop her off and pick her up , in the holidays my parents have her and so does the ex and her parents.
Skydiving hey !! i am B licence qualified (yet to jump this year due to nasty weather)
and im sure you worked hard toget that qualification, im a solicitor by trade. my qualifications allow me to work from home. i specialise in buissnes law, and social funding perusal. so i am able to work anytime i prefer, why did you think i was lazy? yes my children are old enough to fend for themselves, unfortunately theres nothing in their feild to get a job, so they are in college, i want their dad to pay his rightfull way in their life. i dont want his money i dont need it. he brought them into the world then exploded their world because of a hangover? i see mr gonk hasnt made any reply to me, but i aplaud you dave for being man enough to carry on with the conversation. i do not mean that as condescending, but i am bitter as to the subject of csa, not being in a chair and called names or insinuations about my actions in the way i aproached the csa to bring an end to my ex,s scrooge like life
The reason i thought you were lazy was because you did not give the full account of your situation.
every NRP should pay for their child as i did before my daughter came to live with me , it also sounds like your ex should be in jail – not in work .
he was but our justice system sucks and because of my non resnse to certain things he only received a minimum custodial. but then on release whent back to work and still squirrels every penny so no one receives anything. it makes me extremly bitter that he walks on his legs like a proud peakock and is quite happy to know ive been like he left me for nearly 15 years, but im not after sympathy im after justice for my boys and untill i have no breath in my body i will houn dand hound him as im sure you will until you are content your ex has compensated your daughter for the times she wasnt there when your daughter needed her most?