Ex sends me death threats but I fear the law will turn on me

March 4, 2017

On behalf of all the men out there going through this I want to say that from my experience the system and laws concerning parenting are completely SEXIST and lack EQUALITY for men as parents. My ex doesn’t allow me to see my son, and in the few moments that she hasn’t blocked contact with me I was always trying very hard to make effort to see my son and be there for him.

The only reason I stopped trying to see him which was about 10 months ago, at which time I had also not seen him for at least 6 months was because my ex was sending me death threats and harassing me. Up until recently I was getting back in control of my life, in my 2nd year of university, and I receive messages from my friends saying that my ex is sending them hateful messages about me on facebook to everyone.

So now I’m thinking enough is enough, after the death threats and now this next level harassment I’m thinking to actually take this to the police. But because of the way the law works against men as parents I’m concerned that I could be brought up on some sort of child maintenance charges. All I know is for how disrespectfully she’s treated me and threatening me there’s absolutely no way that I’d pay her a penny. I’d sooner go to jail then send her money that’s how it feels for me. I’d happily help look after my son and provide help to support him financially but now being around my ex is out of the question because I fear she’s mentally unstable with the death threats and all. I’d like to know how the law really works, how much trouble either my ex or myself can get in with the current situation. Also I live in the UK so I don’t know if the law is much different to the U.S.

It’s just so frustrating from a dad’s perspective to not only have your child taken away from you but to know he’s being raised to most likely hate you and that you are being told pay her money even if you can’t see him. I think this system is very disrespectful to men and I really hope they make some drastic changes soon enough so future fathers don’t have to go through the hell that I’m going through.


  • Iain Short says:

    Sorry to hear this.

    From experience also, I went through something similar but enlisted the help of the Courts..Unless you’re a complete lost cause the judges will do their up most to see you have access to your child.

    There are ways to defeat the CMS / CSA and I have done so. I now have regular access to my daughter and I’m not held to ransom by the CSA.

    When dealing with the CSA make sure you have any correspondence in writing. Phone calls are futile and frustrating. Get help from your MP. Make noise, make threats just don’t give in.

    I wish you well, if I can help then please feel free to email me.

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