Ex gone contracted to escape a DEO

February 9, 2011

My case is with the CSA in Belfast. They have been dealing with case against my ex husband for over 2 yrs now and all the time it seems they just send him numerous amounts of letters that he NEVER responds to. He went from being employed to self employed but sub contracting for the company he was previously employed by who also keep telling the CSA he does nt work for them in anyway, so i hope they get a telling off and fining for withholding information. The CSA said they could nt trace him through the tax office which lead me to believe hes not paying tax so i reported him to the tax office over a yr ago and nothing came of that either.

The CSA sent baliffs nothing came of that , they got a liabilaty order in October 2010 nothing came of that and now its gone to commital proceedings and i ve been told that could take upto another 3 to 4 months to get sorted. It has been a very frustrating and stressfull ordeal for me as he now owes my Children £7000 which i have no hope of actually seeing for them.

I think if i had walked out and was behaving this way they would have sorted me out by now !!!!!! But no fathers can do it and it takes years to sort them out. I do understand that their are some fathers out there that want to pay and will do anything for their Children my ex husband is the exception to the rule he has done everything possible to avoid paying Child Support and he does nt see the Children through choice because he thinks if he does’nt see them he does nt have to pay for them ! I do hope my case is sorted soon as i dont think i can take much more waiting and disapointment .


  • Deb says:

    This is almost exactly the same as my case! even down to my ex husband saying he is a sub contractor therefore him nor his boss paying tax.
    If I am paying debts for things that happened 6 years ago when he abandoned me why is he not paying the 4 grand he now owes me?
    The csa claim to have many powers…where are they?
    I have complained about my case and written to my mp.
    I dont think we will ever see what we are owed…
    The only time they get money is from those fathers who pay willingly….so csa not needed and when fathers are on benefits.
    My youngest is 18 now…and to top it all our loveley prime minister is stopping EMA… wonderful
    I work full time and life is not easy by far.

  • Karen Bedford says:

    Please join the facebook groups Child Support Agencies failings and others too, as we are trying to get a ‘collective’ together concerning parents who are being let down by the CSA whether mothers/fathers/nrp/pwc to change legislation and get meeting with Maria Miller.

    I too victim of the CSA being subcontracted by the Self Employed!

  • Brian says:

    No sympathy it’s an unfair system. It’s women who use it as a tool to beat men with. Supported by the notion that screwing the EX for lots of money = child happiness and provides lovely holidays for you lot. I’m sorry but given the amount of force we men have to contend with from the brutality of the CSA upon genuine, working, compliant fathers.

    We get nothing, have nothing and receive nothing from the govt. I’m sick of hearing women whinging about the hardship. You don’t get constant calls, threaten letters, harassed at work, lose your job. Why? daddy was reduced to nothing for being upfront and honest. Gets screwed and reduced to living in a single bedroom, no social support to fall on, no one cares, so from my perspective THE SYSTEM IS SHIT!

  • chall says:


    I agree the “THE SYSTEM IS SHIT!” . I also agree ” the brutality of the CSA upon genuine, working, compliant fathers.”

    There’s plenty of men “whinging about the hardship” as you put it. Yet when a female airs their circumstances (BTW, we live in a democratic society, they are allowed), and after reading the posts it appears they have genuine issues with their ex’s and the CSA, you (and some other NRP’s on other posts) feel justified to beat them down and bemoan the plight of fathers.

    Sometimes it seems more of a point scoring exercise, who’s got it worse, who suffers the most ~ But BOTH are being failed by the same system, where is the sense…

    chall ~ afairercsaforall

  • kelly says:

    Success !! My ex husband was taken to court and now has to pay under a suspended sentence . I know full well their are many Dads out there who pay their child support but dont get to see their children as much as they like or get screwed over by the csa . However my ex husband is not one of these men ever since we divorced he has done everything to avoid paying and nothing to see the children .
    Two people make a child why should only one be financially responsible ?

  • Karl says:

    Hi All

    The system lets fathers down all the time, I like many other fathers have provided for both my children. There mother who was my girlfriend, hence not married, has done everything she can to screw me over.

    When we split jut over two years ago I agreed with her that I would pay £200 per month plus pay clothing and out of school activities. This soon became clear that my ex was just spending money for the sake of spending money and I found myself with none stop receipts. I confronted her about this and told her that I wanted to be asked prior to spending and unless she cooled it with the over spending I would stop the extras but continue with the £200 per month.

    About a year ago she made a treat that she would go through the CSA, I said fair enough. When they made there assessment they came back with a much lesser figure. This was not to her liking so she closed the case.
    Then one sunday I returned my children and asked her what she wanted in maintenance to which she requested £250, fine draw up an agreement with your solicitor that is to that effect and I have no issue paying.
    Few day later I received an email from her mother (who has a bigger nose than pinocchio) the agreement was far from straight forward and amounted to over a £1000 worth of debt, barring in mind that I was still paying the £200.

    I then received a CCJ through the door for £400.04, Items of clothing that I hadnt paid for, part of this was she had purchased electric blankets for both my children, who where 2 and 5 at the time. When I spoke with my daughter and asker her why she needed electric blanket she replied saying that they didnt have them and that they where with there great Nana.

    I work in the offshore survey industry and work is very much as and when, I also run my own ltd company. I received a court hearing for the CCJ but couldnt attend due to work commitments. This was then put in the hands of the bailiffs, the only thing in my favor at the time was the address was that of my parents and when I spoke with the bailiff in charge she could see it was a joke and told me there was nothing she could do but if my ex obtained my new address then it would not stop her re-applying.

    Just after that I was refused contact with my children, even though I have a contact order, and unless I gave her the address of where they were staying over night I would not be allowed contact. My solicitor forced me to give this information saying the court would make me, less than a week later I received more threats of CCJ and then came the crunch. I ended up having to pay this £400.04. To date, and with just over two years I have paid her over £10,000 and she is still finding ways to screw me for as much as she can. Latest situation is the CSA have had a Variation application filed against me and a few days ago I saw my ex mother in-law taking photos of my property.

    The whole system is so one sided, im a father who has no issue what so ever providing for the upkeep of my children but when it comes to my ex finding every means possible to screw me for as much as she can. This is a woman on 100% benefits, and has no incentive to work. Worse case I will fold up my company and stop working and sponge off the state

  • bri says:

    I like this comment by

    Kelly: “Two people make a child why should only one be financially responsible ?”

    How or WHY do women think that being on “BENEFITS” is acutally paying anything into the system or classed as “financially responsible” WELL YOUR NOT. It’s a beautiful system for women who only wrap themselves up in the notion of child support is their “salary”.

    chall ~ afairercsaforall
    I’m all for free speach and this country ain’t got it anymore. Its a slowly being taken away from us.

    We men/fathers get no justice or support from a system we all contribute to and for what?. Since when did the male species become the latest target to be made “EXTINCT”, because it sure as hell feels like we are going to be reading all these posts.

  • chall says:


    I’m not arguing the toss about who’s got it worse, it’s futile.
    Not all NRP’s are wonderful and neither are all PWC – either’s ex can have a tough time, whether their male or female!

    I’m surprised by such posts if you expect your idea https://www.csahell.com/proposal-making-legal-challenge-against-csa-7792.html to be taken seriously by NRP’s & PWC alike. Any prospect of change is going to take effort from ALL concerned and the fight will be lost before it’s started if either are alienated.

    chall ~ afairercsaforall

  • tiptaptoe says:

    “How or WHY do women think that being on “BENEFITS” is acutally paying anything into the system or classed as “financially responsible” WELL YOUR NOT. It’s a beautiful system for women who only wrap themselves up in the notion of child support is their “salary”. Dear Bri, I think this is a little unfair to say the least.. Of course you’re right in some ways but have you tried getting a full time job and bringing up two young children on your own? How would the men feel if they had to have shared responsibilities? Meaning: be an alarm clock, cook, maid, waitress, teacher, nurse, referee, handyman, security officer, photographer, counselor, chauffeur, event planner, decorator, hairdresser, personal assistant, banker & I scare away the boogie man. I don’t get paid for holidays or sick pay. I work DAY & NIGHT. I am on call 24/7 for the rest of my life. That’s just BEING A MUM!!! I get a pound a day!!! Is that fair? Simply because my ex has found the loophole in the system and is running a ltd company, he has a Boat, house, two vehicles, computers, mobile phones and all the latest gagets.. While I STRUGGLE!!! I’m a qualified translator and I’ve worked since I was 16.. I can’t work right now as I’ll be worse off, he lives the life of riley and the only people that really suffer here are the KIDS.. 😛

  • molly says:

    Hi everyone!

    Need some advice

    I’m self employed and struggling financially as my ex was taken away due to his violence towards me.
    As a result he’s only aloud to see baby 2 hours a week in a contact centre.
    I have to run two businesses and a house and juggle my daughter on my own
    He refuses to pay more than 30 a week although I’m sure she should be receiving alot more.
    But he works full time and is subcontracted so they can disguise that he even works there!
    I want my daughter to have what she’s in titled too as he’s having her less hours than my baby sitter

    Is it worth phoning csa
    Or am I literally at a dead end?


  • leon says:

    the fact you keep grassing on him says a lot about you. i wonder what you did to make him not want to pay…or is it all his fault?! maybe if u were decent with him he’d help you.

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