CSA wants to make my family homeless because of my ex’s past

September 11, 2010

I really don’t know where to begin..basic facts are I met my partner in 2004 I had my own house mortgage was in my own name after my first marriage fell apart that was the matrimonimal agreement as I had young children at the time.

When I wanted to make home improvements I could’nt as my income was not great enough so I decided to sell and with the equity I made put a down payment on my next property. I mortgaged with gmac as a self cert and continued payments. When the relationship started to make some headway and move on and we were in a position to move on and make some other home improvements and considilate other items we applied for a move with in a different mortgage and thought nothing of it.

This was in 2008, however in 2007 my partner had received a notification from the csa that he could be the potential biological father out of 7 born in 1991 which he was unaware of up until this time, he went ahead with the dna as he was 99% sure he would not be the father as at the time this girl was in a relationship already and it was a brief encounter including many others as stated.

Well as you can imagine once my partner came on the mortgage as we were accepted the csa hounded him and demanded monies oweded as it turned out he was in fact the biological father after 19yrs.  The csa are now demanding payment and back dating this and putting my house and my family in jeopardy and forcing court orders on the house and the probability of evicting me and my family which I feel is unjust when all that I had achieved and worked for was originally by my own self esteem, now I feel victimnised. It was not my partner’s fault that he never knew of these circumstances until his name appeared on this mortgage and now we are both being penalised and the csa basically do not care. They have been very brutal in their demands which has resulted in a breakdown of our relationship over the years. I try talking and communiting with them my self but without any avail as they say it is not my case and cannot discuss options with me, yet the letters they send are addressed to me and that of the land registry.

He has now left me due to the pressure of this and no longer lives at this address and is out of the country yet the enforcement still stays, they are now saying that they can force me to sell the house and make this innocent family homeless due to the default that was never my problem. I really do not know what else to do as nobody seems to be be able to help on my behalf for something that happened 20 years ago and did not come to light until 2008.

The csa have ruined my life.


  • Brokenfather says:

    Your dates are all over the place!

    Are you saying it took from 2007 to 2010 to confirm his paternity?

    The CSA can only go after the proportion of the home owned by him. Did you record the proportion owned by each of you with Land Registry?

    How much does he currently owe?

    What is the equity in the house?

    How old are the children currently living in the house?

  • rach says:

    I really feel for you honey as i am in the exact same situation as you are as i made the mistake of putting my husbands name on my house and a year later a csa bil arrived. Your husband must have known about this csa assessment 19 years ago as they wouldnt just backdate it. you really now need your husbands help as he is the only one who can request his dp files so that you can see for yourself how all this debt accrued and then maybe a solcitor will be able to help you start fighting this. try emailing Nacsa and see what advise they can give you. Iwish you so much luck honey its all so unfair on you and your children and mine are probably going to suffer the same fate

  • Brokenfather says:

    Rach, the CSA didnt exist 19 years ago!

    I would assume the liability is from 2007 when they first contacted the father.

  • rach says:

    if that is the case then surely they wouldnt force her to sell her home and make her children homeless for the sake of what maybe (guessing) 6k ? particularly if the children are still school age? what year did csa come about i know it was early nineties

  • Average Joe says:

    The Child Support Agency (or CSA) is an arm of the Child Maintenance Enforcement Commission in Great Britain and the Department for Social Development in Northern Ireland. Launched on April 5 1993, the CSA is responsible for implementing the 1991 Child Support Act and subsequent legislation.[1]

  • Jason Wallace says:

    THe CSA have ruined lots of lives. Sorry to hear this. Important question – what is the EFFECTIVE DATE? That's the date that the CSA finally managed to get hold of your ex. They cannot date anything before that.

  • Gill Baxter says:

    I didnt think they could touch anything that wasn't jst the absent parents. That wot I have been told as my childs father is saying he is earning nxt to nothing but I think everything is in his wife's name so therefore not assessed by csa

  • Lee Hughes says:

    Please don't use the word ABSENT, it implies that all parents who don't happen to have the physical custody of the child/ren are ABSENT! Not all 'ABSENT' parents have chosen to be such!

  • Susan Ward says:

    oh my god, it makes our problem seem so small. Although we have been through the mill with the csa my heart really goes out to you. WE have come close to splitting up but we are still together and although my husband has said it would be better if he left (?????) i have always said NO. The csa do not listen they are not here to help us they just want the money and no amount of talking gets through to them. There really should be a Law against THEM. I do wish you well and hope that things improve for you. Take care.

  • Paul Fielding says:

    my heart goes out to you all ,we`re in the same boat with these idiots at the csa. my wife and her ex split up some 15 years ago ,he just vanished, leaving my poor wife with 2 kids under 5 to bring up .as time progressed we married last year, the 2 children seemed happy at the time, but the eldest went to live with her "dad', who since returned to the area. been 17 and in full time education ,he applied for family credit, thats were the csa stepped in and pursued ,harassed, bullied my wife for the 12 months back pay they claimed she owes, !!!.Regardless of the fact her ex hasnt paid a penny in over 15 years. he doesnt work ,well not officially, just sits around smoking pot ,drinking ,and been a useless twat. the temptation to harm him seriously is only thwarted by the fact that i`ll end up in the wrong, ,and so we end up paying him 450 a month ,and for what. non of it goes to the daughter .The CSA must be the most unfair system ever thought of, they dont listen ,dont care and ruin lives, how these people sleep at night is a wonder .

  • Yes broken father I know my dates are all over the place but that is the case….paternity was not proved until those dates once they found out that had an co owner ship in the property they asked him to produce dna.
    And that is what my argument is that the liability should be from the dates the dna was confirmed,but no they have back dated payments and accessed the amount through non payment on a higher percentage,bearing in mind he did not know this child exsisted until then.
    The current figure is around 23K if not more cos they keep adding sections on it whatever they are!
    And its not as if we have made AN OFFER what with the equity of the house and my ex offering an amount none of this was acceptable they were wanting more and would not lift the charging order on the house so we could release funds on the equity…
    They are evil greedy fuckers only out for one thing and they bear no consequences on innocent people like myself.

    The child will now be 19 which is 20 years ago when I HAD NO IDEA who my ex was and that we would get together!
    I understand what you are saying about they will only go after his share but I still get the letters addressed to me and the csa will not talk to me about the case because I do not have the authority even though the csa have said to me me that they can force the sale of my home they are not interested at all of the circumstances how this is arose and the fact that up until 2008 the property had been in my my name only….so really I DO REALLY HAVE THE BENIFICIAL INTEREST in the property.
    But apparently thats another case to be re opened for the courts to decide…
    The children living at present in the family home are 19 and 17 one having just finished college the other just finished school so they are really not in a position to be out there without the comforts they have been used to within their family enviroment when we are the innocent side ot it….

    Thank you rach for your kind remarks too I have enlisted a solicitor now and also I have had some good input from shelter who feel that the csa have been totally ignorant to my appeals and corespondance I have tried to make.
    I wish you luck too.

    Average Joe….I do believe the CSA came into force in 1991 so what is it you are actually saying that they are being reasonable in their actions and have waited long enough?
    Surely if they have waited this long and now want to ruin an innocent familys life some leway could be given due to the circumstances?

  • ADE says:

    Hi CSA victim

    I have been fighting the csa for years they are a bunch of crooks and will stop at nothing till you are destitute.Last year I found a site which has helped me enormously.I am still involved though not as experienced as others but we fight the csa and the courts who are both acting unlawfully and we are winning slowly but surely.What part of the country are you from?take a look at the website
    http://www.deadbeatdadsassociation.co.uk/index_files/Page9349.htm it is really for non resident parents however my marriage has broken down in very similar circumstances so i may be able to help if ot i know others who can.You have to make a small donation to join the site and it was the best money i spent,its up to you but we are all fighting the csa/cmec.If you have any problems getting to the website email me.Do not speak to the csa or sign anything!!
    Wishing you luck

  • Big Lou says:

    It was only a couple of years ago that the csa changed it rules on back dated pay being now you can only claim from the day of the phone call. Before I think they could claim from the day of birth if the mother could prove you weren’t together which is unfortunate as I think the csa are putting you in this bracket.
    I reall do feel for you and your family and hope you get it resolved and the most minimal damage.

    The government need concentrate on the fathers or mothers in some cirmcumstances and not involve current partners. Where does it state in the marriage contract that you have to contribute to the csa ??? Its a disgrace. Why should your current partner suffer for something you were not involved in and also the parent who is already paying out anyway. The csa breaks relationships and marriages everyday I think, but I can assure you nobody cares. Its all about the £££££££££

  • ade says:

    as far as i am aware the csa can only claim back as far as the year 2000
    well so they think,they are acting unlawfully and hopefully they are going to come a cropper soon

  • ade says:

    joanne have just had time to read properly through some of the responses you have recieved i know you are using a solicitor but i do urge you to check out the website I have told you about it cost me £5.00 to join

  • rach says:

    Hi Joanne another thing i was meant to say to you, the csa may threaten you will “an order for sale” but at the end of the day it will be heard in a county court with a judge who will have the final say. I personally think that the fact that your husband has now left you to deal with this will quite possibly go in your favour in front of the judge. Make sure you argue the point that the house was yours up until recently and how the csa refuse to discuss things with you as this debt may be based on an interim assessment as it is so high. good luck and let us know how you get on

  • Joanne says:

    Hi Rach,
    Yes yr right the lovely csa have already put that to me in there kind words when I went to attend a court hearing last week for another charging order to be placed because I felt that it would show that there was someone there that had more then just an interest in the property,it was my property and had been until 2007 when we re mortgaged which is not a crime to do so and did not feel that there was any threat against us…little did we know as my husband was as just un beknown to this too as it was just a casual affair 20 years ago that boys do when there 20yrs old and still do!
    I tried to fight my corner as to why I was there but really it was a complete waste of time as the judge the csa woman or beast should I say were not in my favour of what I had to say..in fact the judge said it was “irrelevant’ as to what I had to say today nice one ay!
    That is how the force of order of sale came up when he said that if it came to that then they would have to open up a new case and that is when I would be able to present my case and what you said in yr reply would happen.
    I just feel that the courts the judges are all on the csa side they don’t see the victims even my husband cos its not like we’ve tried the csa have pushed us to the limit which is why the relationship has broken down and he now lives out of the country.
    The beast kept saying how she understood how I felt and the position I was in and I was like what you don’t have a fucking clue what position i’m in or how i’m feeling because yr still pushing and pushing for yr money and u need to do yr job! you’ve got no respect for me or my family have you? I told her how i’ve not been responded to cos its not my case but hey at the end of the day its my house so I will say what I feel.
    It was a dead end and then all the beast kept saying was that we’re going round in circles here to which I said well you’ve made them with yr money making ways and making peoples lifes a misery I hope you can live with that.
    I asked how the amount was calculated and she could’nt answer that as it was’nt her office she came from another one,but I asked how do you in yr office then it must be a higher then average rate because of no contributions being paid for something that was not even known to which her answer was yes…how bad is that ?
    There is no understanding no proper communication and no compassion all cases are the same to them and I don’t know if I’ve got the fight left in me any more..I’m gonna join the web site that has been sent to me and also shelter who I was introduced to on the day of court,they were very helpful and felt I had a case.
    Reading all this comments gives you a bit of hope and an up lift but then you have to brace yrself again don’t you..

    Many thanks Rach

  • A similar thing happened to me a few years ago with a car (not quite as severe as a house, but the circumstances were similar).

    My estranged (now ex) wife had removed me from the joint insurance policy for my car after it had been stolen. Direct Line (the CSA in this analogy) paid her for the car, even though it had been found by the police and returned to me. When they found out they wanted to reposess the car from me, and every time I tried to call them they refused to speak to me because I wasn’t the policy holder.

    They even said I should have notified them when the car was recovered, when I did try however they wouldn’t take my call or even open the case file.

    It was a joke.

    Light at the end of the tunnel perhaps for you though – they recognised eventually (after about two years) that the car was mine and they’d made a mistake. They never recovered the £6,500 from my ex though – she was sitting pretty with that cash.

  • graeme says:


    I, like many other who use this site, are truly sorry to hear the struggles that you are going through. Unfortunately this is the monster that you are dealing with.

    Stay strong and keep fighting them. Never let the bar stewards grind you down.

    This is not your fault.


  • rach says:

    im wondering now if maybe you could take legal action in a county court against the csa for unlawfully placing a charging order against your house. If any other debt compny did this(cus that all the csa is) then they would have to fully explain the debt and prove it and the csa have just not done that for you. People have taken the csa to court before and i was advised that we could only really legally challenge my husbands debt when a charging order has been placed. Its worth enquiring with a solicitor about joanne!

  • rach says:

    i got that advise from a clerk at a county court by the way not the csa and i explained our situation to them (how they were writing to wrong address which we proved and they accepted but wont allow us to appeal) and they said that if that was an ordinary debt company that we could start our own legal action against them (which i know the csa arent a normal debt company but it would be the only way of getting our side heard and a decision made by a judge that the csa would have to abide by, might not work for us cus they are “above” the law but boy will we bloody try it, trouble is court enforcement has to start before we can challenge the judges decision with a case of our own!

  • well its finally here the order of force of sale letter now along with a final charging order so what hope do I have now,they really are going to extreme lengths to have the share of my house even when they say its not my dept!!!!but they are wanting to remove me so how is that not ripping apart my life and family what do I do now?
    I am trying everything possible but my self exteem is getting lower as they will not correspond with me and discuss this case with me,even going to the court hearing was a complete waste of time to represent myself as there was nothing I could say to prevent the charge going on. It was irrelevant at this time what I had to say was the judge’s comment..nice man…
    I’ve contacted my local mp with whom I have a surgery to attend ,Shelter who I was introducd to in court and they seemed to have alot of legay and helpful advice so thats my next step,but it feels like the pressure is on and I’M RUNNING OUT OF TIME NOW.
    Its all spiraling out of control to fast now for something that if it was’nt for me his name would’nt have been on the mortgage if we had known this after 19yrs of him having a brief affair to some slapper who put it about…but boys will be boys won’t they when there 20 yrs old just as it happens now..

    Not sure of my next move after this?

  • Ade,

    It seems after reading the web site that you suggested that I cannot join as its not for wife’s and they don’t deal with third parties.
    So I’m not entirely sure how this would work for me in this case,even tho we both never knew this child existed so naurally he was the non resident having only just found out.
    Can he join the website?

  • Rach says:

    oh god. Joanne did you get in touch with NACSA as they have a list of solicitors who defend order of sales? dont give up yet hun. make sure your mp starts fightin for you too. I have everything crossed for you and i really hope it all goes in your favour, this is the horror that i rreally wished the general public would see with the csa they are evil bstards

  • rach says:

    hi joanne just messaging you to see how you are doing. did things go your way at final hearing i really hope so. xx

  • joanne says:

    Hi Rach,

    Thank you for asking and I trust with yrself is as well as can be expected where these guys are concerned….
    Alot has happened since I have been in touch with NASCA at yr suggestion (thank you ) and have been given a great solicitor who work well together and is very much hands on with the case.
    My ex and I (who left ) are back on track and are now working together on this,it has made our love alot stronger now as alot has come to light thro nasca who have put alot of work into the case in such a short time the csa have played pretty dirty and have behaved with such unreasonable behaviour. It has cost a few £££’s so far but my only thought is to save our family home.
    We have come up wit a shit load or errors which the csa still protest their innocence….but we are fighting every bit of the way as it was not entirely my husbands fault, yet its still hard to take on board when this comes up out of the blue to in effect ruin yr present life and future!.
    I won’t let that happen….

    At the final hearing where we had witness statements,a barrister ready to fire away with all the technicalities and findings we were told that we had only been allocated a 5 min hearing which was just unbelievable… the judge did not have a clue as to what was going on and had not even bothered to read my solicitor and barristers submissions before hand,so we were not happy bunnys with that and a complaint has been lodged.
    Thankfully because of this error the judge understood and leaned a little way towards us and did not grant the final charging order and got a stay which helps us a little bit time wise to put some thing in prospective in an offer as such if it comes to that we will have to see! but still be prepared for the worst at the same time…
    CSA were pissed off about this which was good to see as they had no idea what we had prepared but they do now which will cause a little bit of sweating at their end for a change.
    Thet really are the most cruel heartless bunch of individulas I have ever come across in the way they have behaved there is no emotion no nothing and they think they’e important where really they have the worst job and have no idea how to run it…..this will be proved one day !!
    So its April now which will be the biggy still a bit of a wait to see what will come out of this but time is on our side and we will be ready for them.
    Its been a tough 2010 the last few months and there are times when you just can’t think there’s gonna be any light at the end of the tunnel…its very hard wewill have to see as you said before fingers and everything crossed…

    Well think I went on a bit there lol sorry…once again thank you for yr comments and I do hope yr battle is going in the right direction too

    Jo xx

  • rach says:

    hi joanne only just found your response i am so pleased that your husband and yourself are back together and i hope everything went well for you in april. we are currently appealing our asessments so no order of sale made yet but if we lose appeal they wil be coming after us. hope it went your way for once email me privately if you like as i know my email comes through with my comment to you would love to hear some good news from you xx

  • jo says:

    Hi Rach
    Good to hear from you x
    Not entirely sure how you email privately as cannot see yr email maybe I’m acting daft don’t know !!!
    Well finally in March we had the court case again and against all odds we WON,the case the judge was totally on our side and we had our co’s dismised on the grounds of insuufficient notices given and sent to the wrong addresses over the years and the length of time it had taken them to get this far when we had so little time… the CSA were gutted 🙂 there was so many errors made by the CSA brought to the attention of the courts found by NASCA and our witness statements they just were not prepared for serves them right for there attitudes. So altho that was good news and indeed the need of a celebrational drink there was always going to be a plan b from them…but until then time was on our side to prepare ourselves again.
    So now we are on phase 2 of there proposed actions as they are now going to re apply for the co’s and then issue ofs… but we are as ready as we can be and the same conditions apply with our first appeal and the fact that the child is now a 20yr old man ! hopefully we should get the same judge who was in our favour at the last hearing.

    I really don’t know how they sleep at night they are totally the most un humane people I have ever come across……..

    I will keep you updated after the next hearing on 26th October good luck with your appeal in your asessments you need to find every availiable little bit of info in your favour to give to them that will make the courts listen up when it gets that far . xx,

  • rach says:

    hi joanne im so pleased it all went in your favour the first time, i find it disgusting that they are even trying to apply for it all again! im sure that the end result will be the same as the first time as everything is in your favour sorry i only stumbled upon your answer i thought my email was sent to you everytime i replied hopefully this wil be thrown out again and it will be the end of it for you x im sure it will be xx.

  • rach says:

    oh god just noticed the 26th oct sorry i didnt see that bit before please tell me it went in your favour?

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