CSA do not even try to get my ex to pay

March 7, 2011

I have not received a penny from my ex-husband since we separated and then divorced. It has been nearly 8 years now and I raise 3 children (now aged 12 and twins aged 11) alone.

If I had a legal contract with him to pay maintenance I would have sued him by now and I believe I would have received the monies owed to me. But because I had to go through the CSA he has had 8 years to rid himself of all his assets and to spend all his earnings. Now he lives in a house owned by his girlfriend and has any income paid to his eldest daughter.

The CSA, although perfectly friendly on the phone, seem to do nothing more than write a few letters which my ex diligently ignores. I have had to give them his new contact details on several occasions, they seem incapable of updating their systems correctly.

What I want to know is, after 8 years, doesn’t he have to pay or be punished?

Don’t get me wrong – I wish him no harm, he is a good Dad, the children love him and he takes them every other weekend and for holidays etc. But I have them for the majority of the time, I pay the school lunches, school trips, most of their clothing, childcare etc etc and I’m really struggling.

I’ve downscaled twice since the divorce and it looks like I’m going to have to sell up again. I’ve worked full time all my adult life, but struggled with depression and stress and had to re-think things and leave my job last August. I’m now trying to get a new business up and running but the strain is really starting to take hold as I’m living month to month and the debts are starting to pile up.

That little bit (CSA has only asked him for £50 a week, even though three years ago he earned over £150,000 for the year) would make such a difference – not to mention back pay of 8 years!

I really want to know if there’s anything I can do. Even if he is broke and can’t pay, I really struggle with the concept that someone should be allowed to not take financial responsibility for their children and to assume that I will.


  • Karen Bedford says:

    Hi Georgia,

    Sorry to hear about your probs, unfortunately its not unusual.

    Please join the facebook groups i.e. child support agencies failings and others too for support and advice,

    On a personal note I too have had probs for 12 yrs and still ‘fighting’ the bad system that supports my self employed ex.

    There are many things you can do but need to know what you have done so far as can then let you know who else to contact, etc.

  • Peter Anderson says:

    The CSA is not interested in collecting money for its clients. It is only interested in collecting money where it is going to keep the money for itself to spend on its own salaries and bonuses. Yes, it’s just like the banks.

    Again, this is where the very introduction of the CSA was fundamentally flawed. They decided to overrule all the cases where there were already satisfactory agreements and Court Orders in place leaving the total mess that it is today.

    Go onto a site called CSA – If we have to pay, we want our say! on Facebook and have a chat with Lisa and Sarah. They both have similar situations and seem to be starting to make progress in getting the CSA to actually to do something.

    You can tell them I said for you to, contact them.

  • gambit says:

    It’s an absolute joke, I’m in a simlar position, but it’s only been 5 years for me, 1 of which he actually paid maintenance, it makes me sick to know that there are so many NRP’s out there willing to do what they can to avoid supporting their children financially! I’m not sure what can be done, but surely there must be something!!!

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