CSA constantly harrasses me for more money

October 27, 2011

I have two children from previous relationship and currently have two with my current partner. The two from the previous, i dont get to see anymore because of the current two i have. The mother told them once my kids are born, i wont have time for them and that was the last i saw them – 5 years ago. there mum put a stop to it.

Im on a low income, i have a mortgage, bills, food, clothing etc – you get the picture.

I get HARASSED BY THEM CONSTANTLY LOOKING AND DIGGING to see where else they can get more money from. So today i rec’v a letter asking for the working tax credits my partner claims for my children. They said when i phoned them, its classed as income. i argued the fact that that money is my kids money my partner claims. I said a few obscenities as you could imagine readers, the frustration and anger they cause based on biasism.

My kids from previous relationship shouldnt effect what benefits my partner may claim for her and kids. My kids with me just now are being punished for what?? And im really REALLY P*SSED OFF about it. can anyone elaborate if this is right or wrong??

Im seeking legal advice on this matter also.


  • rita says:

    I think what you should do is, think about the children you dont see! You had them first, then you chose to have more, yet you cannot afford the children you had first. At the end of the day no child asks to be born, but the fact that you dont see your children is ridiculous, you can see a solicitor to gain access rights to see them, but you would rather see a solicitor to see how you can pay as little as possible for their upkeep! Life is too short, gain access to see your children and pay for their needs. Tax credits is an income and the csa are right to take this into account when doing the maintenance assessment, and it is not solely for the children. Child benefit is for the children.

    I wish you luck, its almost christmas spend some time with the children you havent seen for a long time!!!!!

  • annie says:

    rubbish – my son spent thousands on solicitor fees got nowhere. If a mother is determined to keep her ex from seeing his kids she can and theres nothing anyone can do about it. He represented himself in court eventually and got a contact order – she chose to defy it – what happened – nothing. But she still wanted his money.

  • rita says:

    No court keeps a father from seeing their children. There is obviously more going on behind the scenes that you dont know about.

    There has to be sufficient evidence for the court to consider, i.e abuse, domestic violence ect…. The court will not favour the mother without strong evidence.

    Have you actually been to court with him? Grandparents have rights too, you not chose to exercise them?

  • joanne shier says:

    And Rita they take child benefit into account too. Why should my children lose their entitlement when the pwc has had full access to hers?? The government say this is what a child needs, yet take it away to give to another. An nrpp didn’t make the first children either, but certainly gets punished for it, what did s/he do wrong? And grandparents only get access 3 times a year for an hour in a contact centre, yep great rights

  • rita says:

    When you say punished, I have no idea what you mean? Who is being punished exactly? It is is the children without a father.

    I am 100% sure that you have child benefit (to be used for maintenance calculation) totally wrong.

  • joanne shier says:

    And I’m sure your 100% incorrect! My partners children are now adults, csa are trying to claim on arrears for an adult who no longer lives at home or in education, we feel punished because my money aswel has been taken into the assessment until we can prove otherwise, which we did back in July, csa still take their money because they are a law to themselves and slow at processing everything…why should my two children here have to suffer, who are only 7 and 9? The pwc has had her full entitlement to her benefits yet ours used for my children get assessed as income? We have no right to housing benefit or council tax benefit yet gets forced below the poverty line because civil servants don’t do their jobs correctly. And no child should ever be put before another child, because he or she was born first, period! And the guy above is trying to financially support his children, he has the right to a life too, if a pwc remarries etc his/ her partners income doesn’t come into it, how is this not biased? Oh and I too was a single parent with a dead beat for an ex, and I got on with it because I had too for my kids, his loss and he has a new baby with his partner and I wouldn’t dream of taking money from that child, she didnt have my children, I did.

  • joanne shier says:

    And Rita, you tell this guy to see a solicitor, who pays for this exactly? He is already in financial hardship how the hell is he meant to afford legal fees, if he’s working he wouldn’t be entitled to legal aid, yet if the pwc is on benefits she is. If the courts are so in favour for the dads there wouldn’t be a need for fathers for justice stating otherwise.
    To Darren, if you think your assessment is incorrect write a letter to the csa asking for a break down, always do this recorded. I’m not going to jump on you as I don’t have the right too, only you know your situation and what you have done with regards to all your children. I hope your ex let’s you have access one day, its not fair that they suffer for the sake of spite and money, just show in the meantime that you have tried.

  • rita says:

    joanne, he stated he would use a solicitor to enable him to reduce the amount of maintenance, I said why dont you use a solicitor for access for your children. When a maintenance assessment is done a full copy of the breakdown is issued to both parents.

    If a parent is without maintenance when the children are growing up are you saying that is ok? If maintenance is owed, regardless for what period in the childrens lives, it is still OWED. If you choose not to claim maintenance that is your perogative. The law states an absent parent should pay.

    In regards to fathers for justice!!!! lol, did you watch the documentary about them. Most of them were ex cons and domestic violence offenders!!!!!!

    If a man cannot afford to pay for his children that he had, why have more? Its simple logic, its like saying ok well I cant support you financially so i will run off and have more kids!!!!!!!!!! MAKES NO SENSE AT ALL!

    How are your kids sufferin?????????? They have both parents!!!!!!!! You chose to have kids with a man who cannot support his children from a previous relationship, therefore you took on his responsibility too really, you would of known that when you met him.

    Put yourself in his ex partners shoes and think!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Emma says:

    I think it’s shocking how people jump on each other without knowing the whole story. Wether or not he has tried or not to see his kids anyone would be naive to think it’s as simple as going to a solicitor and arranging access or even going to court etc etc. If a mother decides they don’t want their ex to see their kids then it’s very difficult to get this sorted. Our system is useless for child maintenance/access arrangements. If she says no then it takes so long for things to go through the system that the kids have already lost out on valuable time with their father which is disgusting. I’m not just being one sided tho cos there’s just as many men who should be deeply ashamed of themselves!!
    As tax credits are concerned I don’t see why these should be included?? That’s for the children in that home and the ex will get tax credits relevant to the children in her home?? Mine is made up mainly of working tax credits to pay for childcare, why should I hand over that when it’s for my kids?
    We’ve always paid for my Stepdaughter and I wouldn’t have it any other way and we would love her to be her everyday but obviously we don’t have that option. We always asked to see her more than one day a wk but were only allowed occasionally (when the mother was going out usually). She has gone to the CSA on a number of occasions in spite, once because we got a new car!! However, it turns out shed been lying to the CSA so for once they were in our favour and she’s never gone back to them!
    It has taken for my stepdaughter to break down in tears as she wanted to stay round more for her mother to give in, it’s a disgrace! It’s all money orientated and it angers me when people say they feel hard done by. I understand women who are getting nothing being angry as I would be but alot of women try to bleed their exes dry out of spite!
    And yes they should be able to go on and have further children!! If he’d had two more children with the ex it wouldn’t even be brought up and all kids would be treated equally but because men go onto have kids with another woman it builds up resentment which makes matters worse.
    This country needs to have a serious look at the way the deal with maintenance and access and I fully agree with the new system which is to be put in place soon. However, by the time we get moved across we probably won’t need it anymore as were on csa1 and we’ve never been moved onto csa2 yet!!

  • John says:

    Annie ~ I too represented myself in order to obtain a contact order. I got the order and the Judge imposed certain conditions with regard to my ex-wifes behaviour.

    My ex-wife continually flaunted the contact conditions, and I wrote to the Judge and informed her. Nothing was done about my ex-wife and her behaviour repeatedly upset the children at contact times!

    With a heavy heart i ceased contact and told her why! 5 years later she has not apologised or made any attempt regarding contact. She is a feckless mother and a control freak, who cares only about herself and the money gained by using the CSA against me and the children as weapons!

    I spoke with a legal advisor recently regarding the shambolic, not fit for purpose CSA. The legal advisor basically said there was nothing I could do to get the incompetent CSA out of my life, other than a Judicial review or the European court of human rights and even then the outcome was not guaranteed!

    I have, and want to continue to provide for my children by way of inheritance, but I will not be leaving any inheritance to my non resident children, and they can blame their mother and the CSA for attempting to bully, persecute and criminalise me.

    Congratulations to my ex-wife and the CSA they have successfully deprived children of contact with their father…………..all for the sake of money! How sad are they!

  • Mick says:

    Under the new system ( post 2003 ) to calculate child maintenance, no new partner income is to be assessed when attempting to assess child maintenence from a NRP. Child tax credit and child allowance is not part of the PWC personal income and is nothing to do with the CSA. They have no right to demand to know. As for your new partners other earnings. They are not your earnings are they! You and your new partner could split up next week, so how can they assess your partners income and base any maintanance on that and make you pay for it? Dont tell them, simple. It isnt your income. If the CSA persist with these klines of enquiry,tell them to take it up with her personally. Crack a dull 1. She is under no obligation to tell them anything. Your income is the only one that matters. The NRP income.

    What if your new partner was earning £100k a year instead of just state benefit but you earn less than £10k? Does that mean they can take £20k* from you based on what she earns when you only earn £10k yourself? I think not! Have a word with either citizens advice bureaux or ring child maintenance options, they are an advisory servuice and nothing to do with the CSA. Failing that, try a solicitor. You may be entitled to legal aid if on a low income. Or start being a nuisance to your local MP if needs must. Hope this helps. Ive had dealings with these knobs for nearly 8 years, thankfully im done with them now.

    *£20k based on 20% of income payable for 2 kids based on a salary of £100k.

  • lisa says:

    The CSA are not allowed by law to touch tax credits, i hope your ex gets nothing and you manage to get this sorted, the CSA are evil and need to be stopped, they are a debt collection agency thats it and have no government power so to speak, tell them they are not having details of tax credits and they can only base payments on your salary alone, the government are trying to stamp out poverty within the second family, maybe the CSA and women who run to them need to take a long hard look at what they are doing Unfortunatly its not your fault the relationship between you and your ex didt work, though its not upto people on this forum to tell you to put your first kids first because they were born first, all children are equal regardless of when they were born, disgusting comments above,

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