I want to pay but I can’t get them to listen

I have had an arrears bill from the csa.i am paying the required amount they have requested for the future by way of direct debit mandate so its just about arrears.

the amount is approx £17’000. This is an estimated earnings order as i did not get the cerrect info to them within the allotted time.once i had got a letter hand signed by the HMRC and all relevant copies of tax returns i sent these all in only to recieve a reply stating that it was too late too take into consideration and time had elapsed for any type of appeal.

i had previously been advised by a CSA agent to send it in and my arrears would be reviewed.i asked for a copy of the phone calls and they stated the phonecall in question is not available even for a fee. i have resent the info 3 times to no avail.they have told my Ex that she will get approx £17’000 .

i have proof the actual amount is just over £4’000. i have had my brother offer her this amount to cancel arrears but as she believes the CSA calculation she wont budge.im at my wits end,have had to change my phone number as ive had times when the CSA wont stop ringing up to three times a day and unfortuanatley,had the gun pointing at my head.

i know have a threat of a liability order and threats of court.i feel like committing suicide.i want to pay.i pay the amounts for now and the future.i cant get them to listen.i dont know how much longer i can cope.any sound advice is really welcome.

Thankyou.Mark Seaman.07808084146