CSA and partner’s ex are using us as a cash machine!

My partner of 17 years almost has just been contacted by CSA. They say he owes over £100. That might not sound like much. He has just found work which is excellent. Although it’s under the threshold, around £12k per year, but he has a job. We were over the moon. Previously, csa were taking money out of mine and his JSA to go to this child, who is allegedly his. This stopped last year. We vaguely remember a letter last year that says, unless you give permission, we can’t take money from you. So we never gave permission. The child will be reaching 18 on January 2017. What is baffling us is this new letter. It’s doing our heads in. I blew up when I read it. The way I see it, she’s sitting on her arse, on benefits and going holidays here there and everywhere, and it just feels like we are being used as a cash machine.

Our 4 children together suffer because of it. There is some dispute with the parentage, only really noticed later on, like much later on. We believe the child does not look like my man at all. Add to the fact he was not told she was pregnant until she had 6 weeks left to go. Also my man, and he is not proud of this, was on speed at the time. I’m pretty sure that has consequences to the mechanisms of getting pregnant. Furthermore, this was verified by many people, that she was seen around about the time of conception, with another man in the same pub my man used to regularly drink in. So all these factors and the fact she is a habitual liar too. Soz am ranting, but am just so angry. We just get on our feet, and this stuff comes through the door. For a child my man does not think is his, or has seen for well over 10 years. And now I just feel like that see oh double U is using us as a cash machine, and taking money out of our babies mouths, for that child. Should we just ignore the letter and hope it goes away?