After 15 years he owes nothing, all because I ticked a box
15 years ago when my son was 1yr old I was forced by the CSA to make a claim against my son’s father because I was in receipt of family credit – understandable! At the time I completed a form and when they came back with the amount he was to pay it was something ridulously wild that I knew he couldnt afford to pay, I told them I would collect the payments directly from him and I reduced the amount myself that I asked him to pay.
A few years later I stopped contact between him and my son after him messing us around for too long, he didnt seem to care. By then he was settled with his new girlfriend and they were making a new family – I informed the CSA at this point that payments had stopped and we were no longer in contact. I didnt hear from the CSA nor did I chase them up for years as I knew how rubbish they were.
When I found out 3 years ago that he had abondoned another 2 kids and moved on yet again I got back in contact with the CSA. They told me at this point that he claimed to not be working and that a tax trace would be put on him, I was told it wouldnt be worth me getting in contact again for 6 months or so – I occasionally chased them up but was only told the same old story.
Then about a year ago I received about 10 letters all in one day out of the blue saying calculations had been made of what he owed me including arrears and that I would be contacted in due course about receiving payments – the amounts on each letter were different but it was explained to me that during different periods of time over the years that different amounts would have been payable due to his feequent change in circumstances – still I received no payments though.
In January of this year I received a phonecall with an update saying that the court bailiffs had visited his house, bascially letting me know it had not been forgotten and that things were progressing, I was also aware at this point that his ex girlfriend was making a claim for the 2 children that they had togther. This week I got in contact with them and the very first thing I was told is “you are on direct payment” having no idea what this meant I queried it to be told that 15 years ago I ticked a box on a form which said I would collect the payments from him myself and now, despite the fact that I have made contact with them since and they knew full well that I was receiving no money and I was not in contact with them, my case was still on direct payment and therefore no arrears have been accumulating.
Basically he owes me nothing!! I am furious that this has never been mentioned to me before. I dont understand why they have been contacting me with updates of the case about him going to court and the bailiffs etc.. if that was nothing to do with my case but was regarding the arrears which have built up on his ex’s case?
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Well, a bit of good news for him, I did note that you say “you refused to allow contact” and you were not happy about his new girlfriend…..Good luck to him, seems another case of a vengeful PWC on her road to Vexacious revenge
Ha ha ha
What gives you the right to deny contact??? My ex husband pays nothing for OUR daughter but I would never stop contact. Is it a case that he has moved on in his life, he has a new partner but you want to destroy his life?? You, Yourself,are doing more harm than good to YOUR children by denying contact, You sounds as if you were pleased stopping contact and that DISGUSTS me… I struggle bringing up my daughter, she constantly needs things, he refuses to help but I would NEVER stop contact and besides I have no right to.
If after 15 years you have stopped contact and failed to read your forms correctly, What is your beef?, Did you chase up the CSA in those 15 years? Have you asked for your data prints which cost £10 and will show all CSA errors on your case?
Maybe you have left it to long now and if he has avoided contact and responsibility it is for a reason, So to now want paying is your choice but work out is it down to your inactivity or down to CSA error, Your file will reveal all. But be aware the CSA will and can edit your file to suit their decision,
Hope you make the right decision and your child has not suffered due to no contact.
Sorry about the rant, I usually don’t bite but this has really annoyed me.. A child/children NEEDS both parents. It should never be about the money…
At what point did I say I wasn’t happy about his new girlfriend? I stopped contact because he was always letting my son down, not turning up etc… My son used to cry and say he didn’t want to go with him… That’s why I put an end to it.
I was in contact with the CSA occasionally over the years, I don’t have a copy of my original claim form from 1998 so I had no way of checking the original details of the claim.
My son has never suffered due to no contact I have been happily married for the last 10yrs and have 2 more sons.
My only grievance is that the letters told me that I would get payments plus arrears and the phone call updates I had all made it sound like that too – at no point was I told that I should have been collecting the payments and not them. And why give me information about the bailiffs etc and lead me to believe they were finally going to get me some payments if the bailiffs weren’t collecting the arrears on my case just his
He never fought me for access, he was quite happy to have no contact as he thought that meant he didn’t have to pay.
Call it what you like but he’s abandoned another 2 kids since, moved on to another lady who he now has another 2 kids with – he refuses to take any responsibility and does everything he can to avoid making payments.
Of course it’s my revenge – he deserves everything that comes his way.
I don’t particularly need his money but university is looming for my son – I don’t see anything wrong with wanting some help with costs especially after so many years of getting away with it.
Well we’ve heard your side of the story. Would be interesting to hear what your ex has to say.
CSA up to the usual standards of customer service ! Sending details to everybody probably breaching Data Protection. Also it would be owed to the Secretary of State pre April 2010 so if you were on Income Support /Benefits as it was before family credits came in so you may have to have paid that back any way.
I guess he asked for his Case file and they discovered all this then following up the 2nd family case.
Still you brought your son up on your own & you managed, try and take consolation from that !
you hit this right on the head .. well put….
im going to be made redundant within the next few months plus my job is going to pay me redundancy ive been there 12 years i pay csa on time all the time can they take money out off my redundancy ?
to pay for child care not going to get a job asap going to study for 3 months the back working
can not take redundancy money
My understanding is if its not taxable, they can’t take it.
You see thats one example of how bad human beings have come. A female EXPECTS money for a life!! For life utter low scum. And she sits there moaning.
@ Terry.
I find your remark horrendously offensive.
As a Female PWC I expect financial support in respect of bringing up two daughters from their father, who is equally financially responsible for them as I.
It is not ‘money for a life’
Perhaps you think it is permissible to bring a ‘life’ into this world and then fail to support adequately. You are not on your own, there are thousands like you.
THAT is why the Agency was created in the first place!!