Do I pay CSA if ex’s new husband adopts my children?

June 12, 2012

My ex re married in 2007 and i was recently told by a very close friend of hers that her new husband adopted my 2 sons soon after.

I have been paying maintenance through the csa since 2002 when we split up. I have read that when an absent father cant be traced or contacted that adoption is allowed.

My points are that i have always been contactable, i have always paid maintenance for my sons. I contacted the csa with this information as they dont know that my sons surname has been changed, and there reply basically was not interested.

How can i find out if my sons have been adopted or there name has just been changed by deed poll.

If they have been adopted i have been paying maint for at least 5 years that by law says i would not have too if my ex would have told the csa.

Can anyone give me any advise



  • chall says:


    A adoption order means the child is, in law, the child of the adopter and they become the only people liable to maintain said child, the liability of the biological parent then ceases.

    You obviously have parental responsibility for your sons, as you are liable to pay child maintenance and the CSA have your details, so could be contacted. The court would need your consent for an adoption, unless there were very good grounds for them to dispense with such.

    You could try applying for copies of your sons birth certificates, which will show whether your children have been adopted ~ If they have you will be unable to receive copies as the adopters’ names are shown as your child’s legal parents. However, if they have not been adopted you will receive the copies.

    Do you receive copies of you sons school reports?

    chall ~ afairercsaforall

  • Hi Chall

    As a father are you legally entitled to receive copies of your children’s school reports? I’ve often wondered what right dads have with regard to their children’s school work, parents evenings, sports days etc.

    Is this simply a matter of contacting the school, perhaps in writing, and requesting copies of any reports?

  • carl says:

    hi chall
    thanks for the reply.
    i have not had contact for 10 years with my ex or my sons.
    my ex managed to sell our house that i was named on the mortgage so i am sure she could find away to have them adopted by her new husband.
    i have applied for a birth certificate and waiting as we speak.
    I do not know what school they go to so never had reports.


  • chall says:

    Hi Michael,

    Yes, whilst your child attends school you can request their school directly sends you copies of your child/rens reports.

    Issues may start when your child reaches 16yrs as their ‘rights’ kick in, some education providers may continue to furnish you with academic reports regardless, others may ask the child for their permission, obviously if the child refuses, the provider has to take their wishes into consideration.

    I would advise, you write to the school to make a formal request for such as the childs father.


  • chall says:

    Hi carl,

    A Court can dispense with the need for parents consent if one of the following applies:
    They cannot be found or are incapable of giving consent
    They are withholding consent unreasonably
    They have failed to carry out their parental responsibility for the child
    They have abandoned or neglected the child
    They have persistently ill-treated the child
    They have seriously ill-treated the child

    Let us know how you get on obtaining the birth certificates, it maybe that they come through and the children have not been adopted.


  • jay. says:

    By the sounds of it, looks to me that the childrens names have been changed by deed, pre 2003 a pwc could do this without the nrps consent if they were unmarried, but I’m pretty sure if you were married to her when children were born then she would have needed permission as you would automatically have parental responsibility. Adoption is a whole new kettle of fish as your paying csa, so contributing to the children an adoption cannot take place….this would all be looked into as courts take it very seriously when children are concerned and their welfare. Also you said she sold the house with your name still on the mortgage, have you got legal advice on this, as I’m pretty sure that is fraud.

  • Carol says:

    Yes re your mortgage I agree with Jay that there should have been your consent before any sale. Legally I do not think she would have got any other way around that, unless the house was repossessed. There are searches to be done, and you have to consent to a sale.

  • carl says:

    she certainly sold the house this to me is not my main issue just a point that she would do anything.
    in this case she would find away to have her husband adopt my sons.
    as chall says there are reasons a court would grant adoption and she would use most of them.

    i have applied for birth certificate now and am awaiting delivery.
    seems this is the only way to go at the moment.


  • jay says:

    The courts would still need to contact you, my husband is looking into adopting my children. As you are paying csa, my ex isn’t, this means that your are contactable and contributing to your children, for the ill treatment etc, there will have to be proof and reports by cafcass and social services. Good luck.

  • Paul says:

    My ex new husband is trying to adopt my 2 sons I opposed to this as the statement she wrote to the courts was pure fantasy and not fact .i have not seen my 2sons for over 3years she refuses me to see them but how do I convince the courts that this the case I pay child maintence for the boys would I still have to pay if the adoption went against me

  • Carl says:

    Hi Paul
    As far as i am aware if the children are adopted
    Then the new husband would be responsible and you would no longer have to pay maintenance

    Get intouch with csa and tell them asap so you dont pay

  • F Russell says:

    My partners 16 year old son has recently changed his name to his mothers by deed pole. My partner has being maintenance up until 2 weeks ago when he found out. Does he have to still pay maintenance to her? His 16 year old is currently doing an apprenticeship and receiving money weekly for this. H

  • Jay says:

    Hi all
    I’m at a bit of a loss I recently traced by son after 17 years I paid maintenance thru the c.s.a. and was married to his mother and we divorced after 6 years when my son was three years old.
    She made it very hard for me to see him when she found out 8 had a new partner in fact she ran away to London with my son stoped contact with me and stopped claiming maintenance about a year later it’s taken me a long time to find them but the thing is she remarried and her new husband adopted him so he has no clue who I am do I have any recourse she didn’t get my permition to adopt I’ve never been a dad father I’m a teacher so am on nds system to prove I’m not a lunatic I just want the son she stole from me can anybody help please

  • Joe says:

    You sure are a dead beats Dad. You never bother to know your child’s school for 10 years, you didnt bother getting to child mediation or court to try be in your Son’s live , get involve in school or activities and you were ok with that for 10yrs so why does it bother you now that they are adopted?

  • >