CSA destroying my friend’s life

March 29, 2011

I spoke up on behalf of my friend today. The CSA were supposed to look into making a variation for travel expenses so that he can visit his children. His wife made him move to Canada about three years ago. He was sent over there to find work. When he arrived the company who had promised him a job before he went said sorry no job. When he called her to say he wanted to come back to UK she said ‘don’t you dare’. Then when she arrived in Canada with the children she confessed after several arguments that she had had affairs whilst he was away on duty in the army during their marriage. He was so hurt he said he wanted a divorce.

So she returned to UK with kids and took them to live in Essex. He returned to their home in Devon which was being rented and stayed at his dads. When the tenants moved out she rented a house and claimed benefits even though she was offered the house to live in. She then went on to get legal aid which she should not be entitled to. He works dam hard trying to make a living. Last December all of a sudden his boss kicked off against him saying really weird things about his children that were not true. This forced him to leave work. Also the CSA conveniently lost all his papers including his payslips etc. Claiming they had never received them when he put in a claim to pay his wife.

We think that it is more than a possibility that her solicitor told them to lose the paperwork. Then the wife tried to come after me because he was renting a room at my house stating he was having an affair with me. Totally untrue since he had been separated from her for more than six months with the intention to get a divorce. She sited me in all her divorce papers. So he drives from Devon to Essex to see his kids. He has to maintain a car, a job and a house that isn’t selling. She drove to Devon by the way and took all his furniture agreed to a settlement and then went back on her word losing them a sale of the property. She gets more in benefits than he does by working full time. So now he lives in an empty four bedroom house with one single bed lent to him by me and a table and two chairs.

I suppose he is lucky because he served for 22 years in the armed forces and she is now going after a lot of his pension. But she doesn’t want him to see the kids and claims he is not interested in them and is a crap father. The CSA chase him and harass him. He was lucky to get to have his children last summer. And whilst walking along holding his daughter the CSA rang his mobile and accused him of not wanting to pay for his daughter. They shouted at him and threatened him as he held her in his arms. They have no experience of life. Half of them probably don’t have children themselves. They think all fathers are the same and talk to them like dirt. It is time that the CSA stop taking action against fathers and woman stop abusing their the fathers of their children. It is digusting!

I tried to speak to them on his behalf but they said that they did not appreciate my comments and tried to silence me by hanging up on me. They are ignorant and rude. I can see why they have led people to suicide it has to be stopped. She refuses to go to work and yet she is a childminder making it easy and convenient to earn a living. The CSA in the meantime speak to him telling him he is refusing to cooperate with them. They have had his papers since last September and made no attempt to adjust his payments in order for him to afford to visit his children. In order to see them he has to stay in accommodation overnight and drive back the next day. This is after a full working week. She gets more than 21K in benefits. There is no need for anyone to do anything but pursue him until he keels over.

As a woman who has been divorced and suffered financially myself. I went to work to help when my ex left. My ex was earning around £45K at the time and I went to work to pay my way. My children were 3 and 5. I worked for them and for my future. Guess what, my ex took me to court when my youngest was 11 and decided that he was better off financially and he could look after the children better than me. So he took them after pursuading them that I was not a good mother. Then he claimed through the CSA. They nearly gave me a breakdown, threatened me with prison and I have never fully recovered. I lost my job because I exploded at my boss and walked out. My boys tell me they are sorry for listening to their dad and all the wrong things he said against me. The CSA are very bad, they have taken away the rights of parents and their liberty to do what is right by their children. There are some evil people who use their children as a cover to get more and more money. And the CSA support this.

I hope the CSA close down. They are a disgrace. They need to reform using social workers and advisers to help some of these individuals realise what they are doing to their childrens minds.

Today when I told them how badly my friend had been treated that said that they did not want to discuss it with me because I am a third party. I told them the truth that they are preventing him from being able to afford to visit his children regularly. I don’t see what is wrong with that.

Comments

2 Responses to “CSA destroying my friend’s life”

  1. lyn on March 31st, 2011 2:27 pm

    Julie,

    What a mess and believe me we have all been through hell and back with these low life CSA.

    My Ex partner’s life has been destroyed. They took his house from him yesterday and he is not homeless because of his selfish ex wife who sits on her arse getting benefits, who has a son (from a previous relationship) serving time in prison for manslaughter. It was my ex partner who was treated like a criminal not her son.

    It makes me sick to see the way they treat some of the men on this website. Men are not allowed to move on. My ex partner’s ex wife will not be happy until he is in a pine box and she destroyed everything we had.

  2. julie on April 21st, 2011 8:42 am

    they dont no what to do with your large payment because your schedule says you can only have 148 pounds so the computer doesn’t know what to do with the extra money. Be persistent ring every day for a week and if no joy fill in the complaints form on the website and fingers crossed it will be sorted.
    Good luck

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