The consequences of their unprofessional standards are too significant to ignore

July 20, 2013

i will keep this as brief as possible . Before i left the marital home my ex wife and i AGREED on both the amount of time i would spend with my two girls AND how much money she would receive each week . So far so good . this arrangement lasted about a week before she started to not be in when i went to collect the girls , or not be in when i went to return them the following morning .

Her behaviour over the last four and a half years escalated from that first week and can only be described as child abuse . Needless to say i have put up a fight , and continue to put up a fight , using the system we have in place in this country . Over the last four and a half years this woman has made me have countless (unpaid)time off work due to her drinking .

She has kept me away from the girls for weeks on end on many occasions for reasons ranging from ” if you dont give me £2 for some washing powder then you wont see the girls ” to “because i said so ” (too many to list) . On top of all this she started telling the girls terrible things about me and telling them (in front of me )not to go to daddy’s (again too many to list . add swearing ) . She has physically restrained them many times when they have wanted to leave ( because i refuse to argue with her on her doorstep ). We have joint mortgages which have both been in major arrears due to her miss management (drinking) . For two and a half years i continued to pay the agreed amount , bailed her out of her (our , but she lives there) financial cock ups and continued to bear her appalling treatment of OUR children . Then on yet another occasion where i had to take an unpaid day from work i told her that from that point on , if she costs me , it comes out of her pocket.

I simply could not , financially , continue shelling out all this money bailing her out time and again , paying her money for the girls , staying on top of my own affairs AND , having unpaid time off .

Q the arrival of our mutual friends from the CSA. The ex quickly found that the less i see my children , the more money she gets . Q lots of time away from the girls , time she spent consolidating her position by alienating me from my girls . I took her to court at great expense whilst being bullied and threatened by the c s a . i pay’d what they told me to pay and obtained a court order so i could see my girls . Since the court order the ex has continued in the same vain . i took her back to court on only one occasion ( out of a possible 23 ) for breach of court order ( she was drunk and in no fit state ) , i won , i ended up £300 down , she laughed in my face . in other words the courts did nothing . she continued to miss manage our joint mortgage so i applied to the c s a for a variation on the amount i was paying , so i could pay back the arrears and use some ( only £50 per month) of the £225 i was paying to ensure that a roof be kept over the girls heads . They asked her , she said no , i did it anyway . As a result i built up arrears of £608 , they tried to take it from my wages so , i quit . they have since won a liability case against me in the courts , im not going to pay it .

They have , in conjunction with the ex , taken away my position of responibility within the lives of my own children , i am not , and have never been , in a position to make any decisions regarding the well being of the girls . As things stand after four and a half years of lies and abuse by my ex , my girls are scared , thats right , scared , of me their father and no longer wish to see me . So i will list the major flaws i have found with the way he csa operates .

:Once a claim has been made , thats it , there is no amount of reasonable argument or evidence to get shot of them . The only person who can do this is the person who made the claim . I feel they should take the time to determine whether their involvement is necessary before reaching a decision .

:All decisions are made by the claimant .So far , every course of action they have taken has been at the behest of the ex , they simply contact her and she decides .
:They bully , threaten and , are generally rude , even their information booklet ( remember , its just an information booklet ) has a picture of a judges mallet on its cover . These people are dealing with individuals who are going through what is potentially the most traumatic experience of their lives . Vast amounts of sensitivity are a must or they will end up pushing people into taking desperate actions .

They have a system in place where by they can make it look like they are supporting children . We all know how wrong that is .They are quite literally a law unto themselves . The laws which apply to them are deemed unlawful in any other situation for various reasons ( too many to list ) :In short do an appalling job of supporting children . In my view , they should not exist . The consequences of their unprofessional standards are too important to ignore .
Anyway , rant over , keep up the good fight .

Comments

5 Responses to “The consequences of their unprofessional standards are too significant to ignore”

  1. Shaz Nolan on July 20th, 2013 5:03 pm

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  2. CSA warrior on July 20th, 2013 5:56 pm

    Sounds to me that he CSA is the least of your problems
    1) I have no mercy for this gang of theives, but if it keeps you and her apart then it works. Dont give her any more money otherthan what the CSA take. Trust me it will be easier to pay it and be done. if you dont pay the CSA can call in bailiffs take away your driving license and then what are u gonna do.

    Parental alienation is not a new thing and it is a thing that the family courts are now taking seriously. Lets be real the children are not fightend of you, they are frighten of the image that the mum puts in their heads I am sure the 2 are not the same. My daughter at one point beleived that i was a a warlock and I took away her powers. the point is the children will grow up and stop listening to fairy tails.,. they will know u and who you are which is dad. So dont worry. if anything make a note of what is said and when and by who so it can be used in court and if you have a witness so much the better.

    given her numerous breaches of the court order and her drinking I will suggest this course of action I will suggest that you make a threat that if she does not comply with the court you will make an application for residency. If she thinks you are bluffing make the application you seem to have enough grounds. then its make or break so she either complies or she goes to court and risks losing her hold of the kids and all the beneifits that go with it.

    I agree the CSA do the mothers bidding but the above statedgy might help you reach an agreement that does not involve the CSA good luck

  3. Chris Macca McFadden on July 20th, 2013 6:02 pm

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  4. Peter Anderson on July 20th, 2013 9:18 pm

    So pick them up from school instead.

  5. John on July 20th, 2013 11:09 pm

    Good points!

    What happens between parents and their children is for them to sort out, using professional people in the courts if necessary.

    These matters have absolutely nothing to do with a bunch of pen-pushing amateurs, whose mission is to demonise and criminalise non resident parents, reduce them to poverty, on the basis of what THEY say is good for OUR children. That is bullshit!

    They routinely breach our Human Rights, and have been described as emasculated, for failing to allow those they accuse of being tried by a jury of their peers.

    This system will crash and burn in the not too distant future, and I aim to seek maximum compensation from the government for giving me a dogs life for 13 years!

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