Move overseas and the CSA can’t touch you

September 2, 2010

I have just returned to the uk after living overseas for the past ten years. The CSA sent me a letter in 2000 saying that they would not take any other action for payments., (they don’t have the power to chase me for payments living abroard) As soon as I started work back in the uk I’m landed with a £7600 bill demanding payment. My son is now 19yrs he lived overseas when growing up and only returned to the uk a few years ago. I have decided to challenge them in court. Any advice would be great.

My advice to you is move overseas where the bastards can’t touch you or any assets you may have overseas. You don’t even have to move thousands of miles away, Republic of Ireland, joursey to name a few, or as long as your not paying tax to the uk goverment they don’t and can’t take anything away from you.

Comments

50 Responses to “Move overseas and the CSA can’t touch you”

  1. Brokenfather on September 2nd, 2010 1:02 pm

    You are still liable for any arrears accrued to the date you moved abroad.

    No the CM can be enforced by CSA for any period the child resided abroad.

  2. Lee Hughes on September 3rd, 2010 4:50 am

    Where has the £7600 come from? Arrears for assessments while you were actually living abroad?

  3. Jason Wallace on September 3rd, 2010 6:20 am

    Wayne. I feel your pain on this. Nobody can describe the pain that one feels when you don't know what is coming next or what they will do.Only this Monday I was eating with my kids and some dear friends (kids for first time i'n 6 months) and 7.30pm the phone goes, showing a mobile number and lo and behold it is the CSA. As you can imagine the kids were upset, my wife stressed and well, basically a screwed up evening.I arranged that they telephone me at 10.00 Tuesday when I know that I can devote the time to them. Of course, nothing so I go out with the kids for a walkWe return to the house and as soon as this us evidently my house an official looking bloke steps out from behind a car and approaches me. As it turned out this was entirely innocent but I still had a panic attack as a result.Then if course the CSA call at the most inconvenient time and despite my telling them that this was not an appropriate conversation to have i'n front of my kids they persist.You're self employed so you have that stress too – I was for 10 years. I'm not now – I work for a supportive employer and the CSA still cannot calculate my salary.This is total harassment – leaves me questioning my own sanity.

  4. Melanie Jones on September 3rd, 2010 8:43 am

    It astonishes me that an official organisation can get away with this kind of treatment. They seem to behave like thugy illegal loansharks!! I can't understand how in our so called civilised society, these complaints don't result in a major investigation of procedures. Each situation is different and they should be treated accordingly

  5. Lisa Hunter on September 3rd, 2010 8:52 am

    The Csa have always had powers to collect maintenance from a NRP living abroad…see there website!

  6. Karen Bedford on September 3rd, 2010 10:25 am

    How Old Are You? Pathetic – you dont deserve kids

  7. Jason Wallace on September 3rd, 2010 10:11 am

    @Lisa. It depends upon which country the NRP lives and whether (s)he works for a Uk based company http://www.csa.gov.uk/en/setup/parents-living-abroad.asp

  8. Maxine Knowles on September 3rd, 2010 8:43 pm

    Do people really do this? If someone 'can' afford to support their child but moves overseas deliberately to avoid paying then shame on them.

  9. Lisa Hunter on September 4th, 2010 10:34 am

    http://www.officialsolicitor.gov.uk/os/remo_countries.htmHere's a list of the countries there are quite a few that the UK work with in getting maintenance

  10. Dawn Mcfeeley on September 4th, 2010 10:41 am

    I suggest MP. Ice currently have a hugh wait. My case is with ice & I've waited couple of months already. They will only deal once u have given CSA a chance 2 resolve complaint. MP complaints get taken to a special team who have been really good. They do get case sorted only problem when they close the complaint u get put back with the muppets who caused the problem it's a crap system

  11. mr yates on September 4th, 2010 8:03 pm

    Pathetic hell no, I had foregot to mention I was paying for the mortage as well, I could not keep up the repayments and the house was taken and sold for half its value, so in a nut shell not only did I have to give up my job loose the house and not know where my son moved to thanks to the csa. So Karen who would you think is in the wrong here, now remember the csa had just been put together, fathers where killing them selves as they could see no other way out.

  12. Jay O'Hara on September 6th, 2010 1:40 pm

    Actually Lisa, the CSA have no power if either of the parents live abroad. REMO is only applicable if a COURT ORDER is in place; sorry to burst you're bubble but if someone REALLY does not want to pay, they wont!

  13. Duncan Edwards on September 10th, 2010 3:15 pm

    @Jay – apparently the CSA have new rules (that you cant get in writting). They can assess you if you are abroad if you have a financial connection to the UK eg a bank account.

  14. Average Joe on September 12th, 2010 4:08 am

    Karen, are you a PWC? Personally I would quite happily move abroad which are my intentions, not merely for CSA purposes I might add.. I’ve already been forced out of a job and left with £20 a week to live on due to the actions by this corrupt agency. I’ve offered a private arrangement to my ex but she won’t accept it instead she’ll get as little as possible or nothing. Remember, child maintenance is what you pay your ex, not your child. I owe my ex nothing so why the hell am I forced to pay her by the government?

    Anyway, rant over.

  15. Lee Hughes on September 14th, 2010 10:49 am

    Is this for real? You are out of the jurisdiction of the UK but they intend to treat you like you are? This country is a utter ********!!!

  16. well out of it on November 15th, 2010 7:32 pm

    Karen, you seem a little confused..I was paying my ex a direct debit of 950 poundsa month from1997 to 1999 when the CSA stepped in. They made me pay 827 pounds to them, from which my ex received 316 pounds (where did the other 511 pounds go??!!). After a year of hardship for us both we agreed to boycott the CSA. They hounded me for 3 years during which time a school lost its Head of Maths as I went self employed. I eventually moved abroad where I have 3 more kids (1 of whom is stepson who I have provided for totally). We are all still a very happy extended family. Both uk kids visit me regularly (they both came for a month in the summer) I´m off to UK to visit my son at Uni next week, and both are over here for Xmas week. I have taught all 5 kids to swim, ride a bike, they play football, golf, Tae Kwondo, Ballet, play musical instruments. They can all speak to me and know that I will listen. Don´t brand anyone as an unfit parent unless you know them. Its not all about money. I have to go, my 6 year old is stuck on his Letterland book and I have to skype my daughter as shes just had an English exam today….

  17. lainey on January 6th, 2011 10:22 am

    Can anyone help? I moved to the UK in Nov 09 and my payments were stopped a year later as the CSA don’t cover the Republic of Ireland. They are now chasing me saying I have to pay back all the money to them to refund my ex as their services don’t cover the ROI. I don’t have this money obviously and it was maintainence due to me so I don’t see the point. Can anyone help. Can they take legal action against me on this?

  18. Ab on April 20th, 2011 11:20 am

    You all who are jumping ship are pathethic.

    its your child take some responsibility!

    you made them, now help pay for them.

  19. pedro on May 4th, 2011 3:15 pm

    Blow up the fuckin CSA

  20. Catriona Hyde on June 5th, 2011 3:16 pm

    Well Im newly married to my Canadian husband, Im an Australian, myself and my three children have migrated to Canada. My three childrens Aussie dad pays a total of $13.64 a month for the three kids. My husband pays his ex wife a grand total of $895.00 a month for his 15 year old son, now my husband is financially responsible for three little Aussie kids who love him to bits, and he pays his ex for a kid who wants nothing to do with his dad….(hes just paid her a lump sum of alimony too) so we are struggling a bit….but incredibly happy 🙂 at the end of it, wheres the justice?? Australian CSA are useless and Canadian CSA are rorters!!!

  21. A Dad until the end..no matter what! on June 29th, 2011 12:28 am

    Too many of us are ranting at each other. Those who have a hard time getting money out of their ex’s shout for more at the expense of the NRP. Too many don’t want to pay anything..hang them out to dry I say. Some of us have paid everything we’ve been asked to pay all along, then suddenly out of the blue comes a stupid demand for more. So much more that it is not financially possible to meet the sum they ask for. Call them, inform them, provide them with facts and figures, bank statements and all other proof but no, give us your money now or we’ll have you stitched up. they take your last line of dignity away by enforcing your employer to cough up at source. When you get to this stage, you have nothing left to give. No money to live off and an ex who laughs all the way to the bank and in no uncertain terms, does not use all the money for the kids. Why is the tally of people having difficulties with the CSA from both sides increasing every week? Because they are absolutley bloody useless for either side. An unfair system will never prevail and at the end of the day it is only money. If you haven’t got it, they can’t get it!!

    So Ab, and all the others who feel NRP’s are running away (some women are also) to hide, wait until you are in this position if you are so unlucky to be so placed. I have paid for the last 10 years for 3 children and when my eldest son started work my demand fell by almost 25%. A couple of months later a new demand for more than 3 times the amount of money already being paid arrived next. I don’t actually have this amount of money spare and to make it worse, I allegedly owe £1600 in back payments also. Myself, I am lucky enough to be able to market myself abroad offshore and via Japan (no REMO’s applicable here!) which I am about to do. Why? To preserve my sanity, my new family and my 3 older children from a system that is intent on destroying what is left. What about the money I hear you say? My ex is not short of cash, has no mortgage (she got 2/3 of equity as she took kids), a nice new car, nice clothes and a part time job plus board and lodging money from my eldest son. We both know what she’s like as we are both paying for her to the detriment of the 2 younger children.

    Whilst I’m abroad, I’ll be paid almost 7 times my current salary. Lucky me, no not really. I’d sooner be in the UK near my family but needs must. The money is insignificant as I don’t require a salary that large but I will invest it for each of the older children so they have a nest egg each that they can spend as they see fit. The best bit though is that my ex know’s I can do this as I worked abroad for many years before I met her and she believes I can be sorted out no matter where I go. Not so. Why then doesn’t she take my offer of an agreement between the both of us that I can manage and still have some quality of life at both ends? Before you all rush in with an answer..it’s greed and vengeance…nothing more and nothing less. Wasn’t even me who had an affair and ended the marriage either. I just got on with my life and picked up the pieces, got remarried to an amazing woman and had a beautiful daughter who my 3 older children adore. Lesson of the day is ‘What goes around comes around!’ and best of all I get to pick up Japanese again and learn from the masters of how to look after your extended family properly without Government interference. Pride, honour and a legal system that views both sides as 50/50 if required is what I have to look forward to.

  22. Anon on July 20th, 2011 8:19 pm

    I’d never pay an ex-wife to take care of a child. We could share the burden equally, each paying for the child when he or she is at our place. Anything else is just violence of the state against me. If some lady tried to initiate that violence against me I’d respond in self defense by killing her. Better to go to jail and keep your morality than accept living in an unjust world. I don’t think it is right to kill but it is the lesser evil than ending up a sniveling coward suppressed by a socialist, misandronist state. If people wanted equality for men and women they’d support male abortion, and the right to men and women to have an equal burden raising the child, not exchanging any money between them. These courts just see men as walking checkbooks.

  23. amberk on October 22nd, 2011 2:04 pm

    To be fair csa are corupt they take money off you and only pay your kids a percentage keepin the rest for themselves!! However this shouldn’t be a problem to someone who wants to pay for their children as u can make an arrangement with their mother so csa don’t ever have to get involved in the first place! Make sure u get receipts tho else she may stint u for thousands sayin u haven’t payed a penny

  24. Donia on January 1st, 2012 5:51 pm

    Just hearing the word CSA makes me furious…. Unfortunatley I have been unlucky to have experienced both sides of these corrupt people.
    I myself have 2 children from my first marraige and have recieved in total £5.68 in payments through the csa, my ex husband at the time was earning £700 per wk and had a new partner who was also in full time employment.
    I was in a constant fight for 9 yrs to get this resolved, im still waiting today…my children are adults now and have there own homes. I myself remarried 12 yrs ago and my new husband also had a child who was 4 yrs when we met, we have paid each month £1000 through the csa for the child until we moved abroad 4 yrs ago, we too were told that we no longer had to pay, Thank god for that. that may seem harsh to those single Parents out there, lets face it CSA clearly have double standards, the message I was clearly getting is my kids did not matter and had to bring them up on my own and then paid heavily for my husbands child… £1000 per month … Its a joke, so 10 yrs of those payments believe me was very very hard and I certainly dont feel bad for not paying for him whilst been abroad, the child works himself now and we had hoped he would have had a nice little nest egg from all the money paid.. Not a chance.. The mother made sure she lived a very nice lifestyle from her winfall… I refer to it as that as she has never worked a day and has a nice 3 bed private house. Im not too bitter anymore !!!! I hope now people can see that the system does not always work for either parent, I certainly was very unlucky of both of my dealings with the corrupt b******s

  25. Féfé on April 20th, 2012 4:22 pm

    So, does the NRP can avoid paying CSA if he lives abroad? ie: in France

  26. soso on May 5th, 2012 11:21 pm

    if you haven’t paid anything for 10 years, the 7600 pounds is nothing. 760 per year, 63 pounds per month!! try to pay for childcare and food and clothing and schooling with 2 pounds a day!!
    And you have the cheek to whine about it!??

    Shame on you! Get a vasectomy!!

  27. Toseland52 on May 21st, 2012 9:20 pm

    I have been reading through these comments and all these people who say ‘have kids , then shut up and pay’ are the problem within today’s politically correct society.

    If you actually listened to the majority of the nrp then you would realise they actually don’t want to avoid paying, they simply want to pay a fair amount.

    I cannot understand how that is difficult to grasp. And when these nrp say that the CSA do not care about anything but extracting as much money by whatever means possible then they are saying it because its true!

  28. Bitch hater on May 26th, 2012 1:22 pm

    Ok so hat about when you have the perfect family like i did then one evening the ex comes home to say she has been sleeping with someone else (forcing me to have std test the dirty cow) and she is leaving? The very next day she took my kids away and I have not seen them for 5 and a half years. Today I had a letter saying I have to pay £46 a week out my £104 a week part time job by force and I have two children who have no mother from another relationship that I am bringing up alone?
    I now have to tell me boss monday I have to quit my job and i’ll then lose my car so i wont be able to take my kids to school or the seaside anymore. I’ll also have to sell my lovely dogs as I cant afford to keep them with no job. I am a skilled tool maker and now have to rott at home all day watching shit tv and going to job club. Just cause my ex couldn’t keep her legs closed and keep loyal to me and the kids.
    The csa make me f ing sick and I wish I could blow their f ing offices into space dust!
    F you csa!

  29. Rachel on July 14th, 2012 11:23 pm

    I fell the wrong parents are targets, having listened to two sides of the argument. I have two children and left the UK to work in Africa (the children were 1 and 3 at the time), might sound odd but I was offered accommodation and childcare help (a godsend), The father of my children left when my youngest was 6 weeks old and eldest 1. His (now) children go to private school in the UK. He doesn’t pay a penny. The CSA told me they could only help if I recieve child benefit (still in Africa, so not possible) and no private business wants anything to do with me. You may think ‘fair enough’ but we are temporary residents overseas – the story is much longer but, in short, to return to the UK would definitely mean no job (not immediately anyway) and no place to live!! What annoys me is that he lives a ‘The Life’ in a country that I should at least be able to provide a life for me and the children in.

  30. Alan on August 17th, 2012 12:06 am

    Some of the comments on here are totally inaccurate and others appallingly irresponsible. The CSA do not collect money and keep some for themselves…this is nonsense. Child maintenance is calculated according to a set of rules which relate to the specific circumstances of the case. At the end of the day both parents must take financial responsibility for the upbringing of their child. In my case I only pay 12% of my net income, which is hardly unreasonable. (More typical is 15% if the NRP has no other children in his own household). Unfortunately, some irresponsible fathers do not want to accept any financial responsibility for their children and attempt to avoid declaring their full income to the CSA…just as some irresponsible mothers attempt to deny the father access to his child. The irresponsible parents then rant and rave and quote all sorts of unbelievable rubbish to make themselves out to be victims…in fact they are gutter trash if they cannot put their childrens’ interests first !

  31. Michael - CSAhell.com staff on August 17th, 2012 9:43 am

    What you say Alan is true, in theory. The CSA is supposed to calculate maintenance based on a specific set of circumstances, so there should be no grey area, no speculation and everyone should know exactly what they’ll be paying. Sadly we don’t live in theory, we live in the real world, and the mistakes the CSA makes with its calculations are rife. They don’t follow their own calculators, they don’t follow their own rules and the money NRPs are asked to pay rarely tallies with the percentage of their earnings they’re supposed to be paying.

    Rather than come on here calling NRPs gutter trash for explaining their situations, you should learn to understand not all situations adhere to the rosy outlook you seem to have on the CSA.

  32. LW (finished by the CSA) on August 26th, 2012 12:41 pm

    In 2008 i settled down into a relationship, me and my partner decied to have a child & so we did. A gorgeous little girl born in 2010. 2 weeks after she was born I received a call from the CSA asking if I was the father of a certain 14 month old baby boy, I knew nothing of this child so I told them so & then they mentioned who the mother was, it was my ex girlfriend, I was fuming!!!!! I never had unprotected sex with her so I couldnt work out how she became pregnant. I later found out from one of her friends that she played god one morning with my used condom & a syringe to get pregnant just so she could get a council house, benifits & money of me. I have fought the CSA and explained what has happened and they dont give a shit. In the last 3 months I have lost my job due to depression, lost my partner + little girl and now on the brink of bankrupsy. All you mums who have children just to get a free house, benifits & to screw the bloke, I hope you all go to hell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  33. gacklasj on October 15th, 2012 4:38 pm

    claim common law, you’ll be ok. TV Licence – Parking Tickets,Census and speed cameras – under common law has a crime been committed??? Never fill them out – no consent + no contract = no comply! Get educated everyone Check out common law ‘John Harris 1-5, its an illusion’ on Google and Youtube, the chap speaks sense – also ‘meet your strawman’ cartoon on Google – it explains in simple terms all if not most you need to know about corrupt society. Jordan Maxwell explains the deceit with birth certificate and law of the land/sea

  34. Mole on November 5th, 2012 4:52 pm

    I have also seen the CSA at work on both sides, I spent years as a lone parent working full time trying to make ends meet and trying to get payments from my daughter’s father through the CSA, when they did finally do a calculation the amount they expected him to pay left him broke and unable to afford the train fare to come and see his daughter. I have been with my husband now for 5 years, a couple of years ago we realised that the CSA was taking a lot more from him than they should have been, most of this money was not going to his ex partner and in fact was being held in the CSA’s bank account, I fought this along with the help of my MP’s office and managed to get the money refunded. Then my husband got a wage increase, I informed the CSA straight away, it took them over a year to do the calculations again with a lot of phone calls and letters from myself and my MP’s office, when they finally recalculated they stated we owed arrears going back to when he received his wage increase and that we had to pay that NOW, again with a lot of help from the MP’s office we managed to get them to agree to us paying off the arrears in instalments, this was in January, the payments were meant to continue for almost 2 yrs, we have now received a letter stating that we have to pay the arrears off in a lump sum, I telephoned them and they apologised for the screw up and stated that we should continue paying by instalments, now we have just received a letter stating that they are taking the full amount as a deduction of earnings, I telephoned them and they said there is nothing they can do about it. I have written to them and they say that the letter has been passed to the Complaints dept who I am not allowed to contact. Not only is it extremely embarrassing for my husband as his employer will think he is not making the payments that he should be but it is also going to leave us in a position where we cannot afford to eat this month. Yet again I have had to involve the MP’s office!!!!! UNBELIEVABLE!!!! We have contacted my husbands ex partner to ask if she would be willing to set up direct payments in order to take the CSA out of the equation but she has refused…

  35. Kayv on December 27th, 2012 3:30 pm

    How vile. Your child, you provide for it… Not run away.

  36. richie on January 24th, 2013 7:52 pm

    the csa are a fucking joke! i have no problem paying for my children but fair is fair, my x even after court case after court case refusing access even tho courts gave order but the system fails again, she has never worked a single day nore her smake head new other half and i am getting royaly raped by the system, i agree pay for your kids but fairly not by raping the working, and for all you women who abuse the system get fucked! i deff agree with pedro down with the csa and the uk government (im a welsh patriot)

  37. Betty on February 16th, 2013 2:33 am

    How can you as the non resident parent, prove to the CSA that you have moved abroad? Does anyone know? I am a non-resident parent and I pay my ex a lot of money (and I am a woman by the way) He took my baby away from me, it is a loong story. He is self employed and earns more money than me and won’t let me see my daughter and has poisoned her. I have no reason to be in the UK anymore, I am tired of it all and I want to go back home (USA). How can I prove to the CSA that I no longer live in the UK (when I do move away) I read all these stories about people leaving only to be told they owe lots of money? Thanks.

  38. john symonds on April 19th, 2013 3:41 pm

    I have a ex wife from hell she wastes money, i have got her out of debt more times than i can remember and i pay into my childrens accounts but its not good enough for the csa so its all going to her now and she will only waste it on other things like drink tattoos and going out my children will not see any of the money. The csa are a load of wankers as long as they get money out of you they dont care were not on a good wage and not sure if were going to get through and im still paying off her debts around £7000 but because it was on a card the csa dont want to know just dont know how much more i can take.

  39. Dee Hawkins on May 27th, 2013 5:18 pm

    Of course all of you absent parents will rant at the CSA, especially those who the Csa trace! Too bad! What about the life you create and leave to be supported without your financial assistance? It is you who should be ranted at!

    Be aware all of you who live abroad to avoid your financial reponsibilities, if you live within the EU the UK Csa have the power to perform reciprocal enforcement of maintainence orders, it isn’t exclusive to EU countries though as other countries including the states and australia can do the same!

  40. Stevo on September 29th, 2013 5:07 pm

    I pay child maintence but csa day it’s not enough . They don’t take into account my expenses . My father is Irish and I’m thinking of becoming Irish national . I’m not running away from my kids or trying to avoid paying for them . I’m running away from the CSA . Can anyone give me any advise pls ?

  41. onthereceivingend on October 6th, 2013 7:10 pm

    It absolutely astonishes me how all the NRP feel ‘hounded’ and destroyed by the CSA. Furthermore the resident parent is viewed as being wasteful of any money they receive. Firstly, the fact that you are being contacted by the CSA tells me you haven’t paid what you can according to the calculations…..or in the case of my ex absolutely nothing at all. On the second point, the wasteful ex wife, frankly I find that offensive. Children require financial support and on the assumption very little or nothing has been paid then I am at a loss to know how the resident parent who is actually providing for their children has any money left over to waste. Grow up and look after your children because they are who is most important in this. For every move you make to avoid payment ( to your horrible money wasting ex partner…..who is actually providing for your child/children) it is actually the children who are going without. Despicable behaviour

  42. peedoff on October 19th, 2013 1:50 pm

    My ex moved abroad ten years ago after being given a detatchment of earnings order ( he was in the police) saying you wont get a penny out of me! I spoke to Csa 8 weeks ago after they rung me to find out if I knew where he was! He is due to claim his uk police pension in 2 years and I wad informed that although they couldnt get anything off him now, the arrears of £58.000 would be payable once he starts recieving his pension. They have phoned this week and told me they have made a mistake and had no legal right to be claiming from him and are therefore closing the case in retrospect…ie from 2003- in simple terms he now has no arrears! Just to add insult to injury they said I could reapply when his pension kicks in 2 years but added….no point really as kids will be over 18! I do see both sides and really feel for parents that provide financially, emotionally etc. Th eones like my ex who have no intent or interest are the ones the csa should be targeting! In short accirding to csa….your not a responsible parent if you dont live in uk!! Shocking x

  43. bla bla on December 9th, 2014 9:27 pm

    All you money grabbing bitches on here should keep you gobs shut as well as your legs,your the ones that throw us men out and slag around with other men then force us to pay..why should we..your fault in the first place you sluts.

  44. Off to France on October 18th, 2015 4:56 pm

    It all depends- firstly on the level of access etc. I don’t make myself out to be a victim or an NRP. I pay my dues for my daughter every month via the CSA. The problem lies when access is denied to you when you have a manipulative mother who knows the system and how to move in it. Who has gone on to do the same to other chaps.

    The question is should you pay maintenance for a child you don’t see or move abroad and set up a trust fund so you are not funding what has become a lucrative business?

  45. Assaulted by the CSA on November 26th, 2015 12:32 pm

    All these people saying “you should pay for your kid, take some responsibility” – it just shows how idiotically naive you are. I pay around £300 a month for my son, my ex doesn’t even let me see him and when I try to take her to court she begs me to drop it and promises access, still hasn’t happened.

    I know for a fact she spends the £300 a month on a car, cause she went crazy once into a rant because I was late for a payment and told me she might lose her car – then tried to back step.

    So get off your high horse, it’s more complicated then your tiny brains can fathom. Who is making sure the money goes to the children, cause I assure you in at least 30 – 50% of cases, probably more, it’s not. The government enforce getting the money from the NRP but zero checks are done to make sure the money arrives with the child and it ends up buying new cars, fags and booze. So why should a NRP fund the lavish lifestyle of a bad mother/father.

    Roll your neck in with your uneducated pop culture comments.

    I’m moving to the other side of the world, when I do the money stops going into her car payments and goes into a Child Trust account which my child can take when 16 for a house or education.

  46. Tracey on March 3rd, 2016 10:20 am

    You NRP’s should be ashamed of youselves. The money is for your own children. If you are irresponsible then you shouldn’t have had them in the first place. Try dealing with food , shelter , schooling costs , bringing a child up with to love and respect others which obviously your own mothers never taught you , the time it takes from your day to take children back and forth to school , to their after school clubs and to their friends etc etc etc.

    Then you can tell me how hard up you are when you have walked a mile in the resident parents shoes.

    You irresponsible , nasty , evil people. You deserve all the bad things that come your way. I pray to God for true justice against you people every day.As this world does not provide any .

  47. Tracey on March 3rd, 2016 10:26 am

    BTW all of the money I used to receive went straight to my child and no other purpose.It didnt even cover everything it needed to so you are so wrong.

    I am not mindless I have an MBA so before you start calling people mindless without any proof you need to look at the reality and the facts a little more carefully.

    I have never ever stopped my ex from seeing his daughter, yet he pissed off to Australia because he is a selfish irresponsible nasty piece of work. He has not bought her one present , he has not taken her anywhere , he doesn;t even want to see her until she is 18 she wont even know him then and she already hates him . He doesn’t even take her on holiday he just enjoys causing trouble and being a general pain whenever he can.

    Not all NRP’s are like you and want to see their children.

  48. Tracey on March 3rd, 2016 10:34 am

    Thank God you are providing your child with at least a child trust account for her education , good for you , finally a NRP who is giving money to their child unfortunately my child wont even get this.

    They also need your time and your love before they are 16 its not just about the money. I have seen my daughter suffer terribly emotionally because of what her so called father has done , those scars don’t heal ever . You need to be there for them as well. Not every resident parent spends on things that are not for their child. I know all of the money I have received has gone towards my daughters well being up until this point , until the UK government said he was out of jurisdiction and I had to contact REMO to enforce maintenance through the Australian government. WIth a magistrate in the UK telling me I dont need the money anyway. No its fine to let a child suffer at the hands of an irresponsible parent isn’t it , that seems like justice. lol !!!!

  49. Normal Dad. on June 9th, 2016 2:26 pm

    Yes I made 2 children in a happy and healthy relationship or so I thought at the time. I now pay £600 per month for my children who still wear the same clothes I bought them whilst with them 3 years ago. I would be more than happy to provide £600 a month in clothes, books, groceries, heating credits etc but no, not possible.

    However my ex drives a sports car and took 75% of the money I had and everything I ever owned or bought except the clothes I was wearing. I was left homeless and penniless as what was left was used fighting in court for access whilst as a single mum she got legal aid.

    Dont for a second think that the UK system is fair it isnt. 99% of fathers don’t leave the country and their kids behind because they want to and just don’t want to fund their kids….they do it out of desperation that they can’t afford to in the unfair levels derived by the CSA.

    There comes to a point when a NRP see’s his ex profiting from his children while he struggles to survive. They become a financial pawn. I for one can no longer afford to live and provide at such a level for my children and I am likely to move.

    Nobody mentions tax credits that are recieved by the resident parent do they? My ex takes home close to £4k a month after tax and I have less than £20 per week spending money after bills and living costs. Is all an NRP can provide for a child’s life money?

    I will leave one final comment here for those who bitterly think that anyone who moves to another country is shirking responsibility:

    Surely a Non-Resident Parent that pays something towards their children and takes responsibility – i.e. what they can afford to pay and enriches their childrens lives with their prescence and love is surely better than one in a box in the ground?

    And that ladies and gentlemen is why NRPs move abroad.

  50. Advise needed please! on November 26th, 2016 10:16 pm

    I know this is an old thread but wondering if anyone could give me some advise.
    I was with my ex partner back in 2002, we had our gorgeous son together but unfortunately the relationship broke down. We spilt when my son was 2.
    I kept in contract with my son, even with the frosty relationship I had with his mother.
    A year later she met her new partner, and the everything went to s**t for me.
    My sons mother stopped contact and told me if I wanted to see my son I would have to go to court…no reason at all, but still wanted me to pay child maintence every month which I did.
    I got myself a solicitor and done the only thing I could, fight her for access in court. This was a lengthy, stressful and expensive time let me tell you.
    My sons mother represented herself so had no solicitors or court fees to pay, which she took to her full advantage.
    Everytime we went to court she prolonged the case, turned up late, cried wanting to take breaks knowing it would be costing me more money.
    She tried everything to stop me seeing my son, told the judge I was dangerous, she was afraid I was going to a kidnap my son and even stooped so low as to say I raped her (this claim she later admitted in court was not true)
    I had to obtain doctors letters, attend classes to prove this was not the case. The whole court process went on for years.
    Eventually the court said enough was enough and granted me access in a contact centre.
    Because I hadn’t seen him for so long this was the only and the best way they thought would build our relationship and bond between me and my son back together.
    Another lengthy process with just 2 2 hour visits a month, cafcass reports, some times his mother wouldn’t show up and other times saying my son was ill. Obviously moving forward was taking a lot longer and I still wasn’t seeing him very often.
    After a year of contact centres I was allowed to take him out of the centre for a couple of hours….
    to cut a long story short a year after that the court agreed I was not a danger, show commitment and responsibility and was granted access to my son every other weekend.
    Everything was going amazingly seeing my son. Myself and my partner had a child things couldn’t of been any better….apart from still paying off the thousands of pounds of debt I racked up in court.
    In 20011 my ex called me to her house for a meeting.
    The worst thing that could every happen happened!
    She told me she was emigrating to Australia with my son and her new family, I was literally crushed and devastated.
    I went back to court to see what my options were only to be told my son is nearly 10 so able to stand up in court and make up his own mind where he wants to live. I couldn’t put my son in that situation as to pick , as he resides with his mother and his two other brothers I knew he was going to end up moving.
    He left in 2012, I had an agreement with his mother that I would not have to make any child maintence payments as I would use this money for flights two and from Australia for either me or my son.
    I went to Australia in 2014 for 4 weeks and I flew him over here in October this year for 3 weeks.
    Completely out of the blue I’ve had a phone call from Australia as his mother has filed to get child maintenance from me..
    They asked loads of details from me, wanted my address, my P60 details, details of my other children. I refused to give it to them and told them they would have to call me at a more convenient time.
    I’m worried if I have to start making child maintence payments I will not be able afford to actually see my son…literally have no idea what to do.
    Anyone else been in a similar situation or could spread some light as to if I have to pay.

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