I followed the children of my ex’s new partner to find where he lives
February 13, 2013
I am at a loss.
Several years ago now, I told my ex that after three years of paying nothing towards his daughter I must contact the CSA for their help.
At this point he saw his daughter once or twice a month, always on his terms.
As soon as I did that, he quit his job and ceased all contact. Four years later the CSA keep finding him, passing his details onto the bailifs but as soon as it gets that far he goes underground again.
I am told he has been working self employed and that on at least two occasions Bailiffs have entered his home and he has agreed a repayment scheme, only to go missing again.
The real killer in this story? I am the one who has found his address each time and passed it onto the CSA as I know where his new partners kids go to school and where his partner works, so it’s just been a matter of following them back home each time.
Oh, and his partner also claims single parents benefits and claims CSA from her two children’s biological father.
I feel like a complete mug.
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Good for your EX, I hope he always manages to keep one step ahead of you
To be fair I.cant.blame your ex.for not wanting to have anything to do with you.or the CSA, what you are doing is stalking, maybe give your.kids chance to have a relatiinship with there dad instead.of being nagged about money, whats more important lining your pockets or your kids feelings, what your ex does in his life now has got nothing to do with you, leave the.poor guy alone, or is this going to be another dad who commits suicide because.of lies being told by the beitter ex amd the clutches of the CSA
Following children is against the law, it is a sad person that follows children just to get money out of their step father.
Access has nothing to do with money!
And as soon as you money grabbing PWC’S realise this then the better all children concerned will be.
Following someone else’s children is wrong how would you feel if someone done that to ur children.
Lol, Dolphin i totally agree, this bint must be a desperate for cash and desperate to see her ex to, sad lonely bitch, is it any wonder she is the ex,
Just to clarify you know his partner claims single parent benefits, you know this because???? Your ex,s partner and what she earns has got stuff all to do with you or the CSA, what she earns and does in her life is upto her not you
If an NRP is moving and not informing the CSA of his new address in a bid to avoid his responsibility for paying for his children and the PWC becomes aware of where the NRP is living the PWC has every right to pass this information on to the CSA. Also if a person has knowledge that someone is claiming a benefit that they are not entitled to then they should report this to the benefits agency
@ Alice, would you as a NRP like another woman following your children to school and back????? Its a criminal offense, stuff the rules of the csa maybe the police should know what this woman is doing for the safety of those kids,
there is nothing in the post from Jane Amanda to indicate that she did anything which put the children, or the NRPs partner’s safety at risk. She simply walked the same route and took note of an address which she may or may not use to locate the NRP who is failing in his legal duty by not providing this information to the CSA.
Had the PWC approached the children and used threatening behaviour to extract information from them then clearly this would be unacceptable.
It is also a criminal offence to use any form of communication media (internet included) in a way that can cause another person alarm etc
.
It is also a criminal offense to follow children as well, thats what i have just been told by local police, so maybe i should find out where the poster lives and report her,
@ Alice, you are only sticking up for the PWC yeah we know we have heard it all before, all your bothered about is the details of where the next lot of money comes from, your only doing your job, please do us all a favour, there has got to be more to life than the CSA and the strife they cause people, and please do read up on the law, its changed with so many nasties about
Alice does not care all she is after is her bonus, we all know she lies like a cheap NAFFI watch.
yet another unfounded comment, this time from Craig, another one who considers that he ‘know’s me and another who is no longer a member of the FB page after becoming abusive to various members when his repeated postings did not result in support – the difference being that Craig was removed from the group by the administrators.
Perhaps if members on the various forums put as much effort into providing supportive or factual information as they do in being abusive and expressing personal opinions on people they have never met then the outcome would be a lot more productive
“lisa on February 13th, 2013 6:52 pm
@ Alice, would you as a NRP like another woman following your children to school and back????? ”
Thats just the point Lisa. If I’m reading this correctly she is actually following his new partners children!!! Is that right Jayne, are you following someone else’s children? Please tell me I read that wrong J”ayne – I know where his new partners kids go to school and where his partner works, so it’s just been a matter of following them back home each time.”
That is really sick and I suggest you get expert medical help urgently! Can you imagine if we all started following a strangers children through the streets? Someone would call the police and rightly so.
You have published your name, if your ex comes onto this site and reads this you may have a visit very soon from the police.
What are you going to do next, nail a dead bunny to their door? Did you know there is a law against stalking people? They are not your children, not your ex’s children, they are the children of a person not involved in you and you ex’s marital breakdown.
I understand you are frustrated with the apparant lack of support from the csa but your ex would only give up work again, this isnt the way to deal with it. Please, please stop this, they are children and they are not yours.
@ j, the reason alice is on here plain and simple, the more money they get in for the PWC the more the staff get in bonuses, yes you read it right above the sick sad woman is following children to and from there home, thats stalking at its worst and she needs reporting, as for alice she is a god damn disgrace, i hope to god nobody finds out who you are! you have caused friction with so many NRP lately its untrue
If you read back my original post simply stated that if the PWC has information on the NRP’s address she has the right to pass this information on to the CSA – I did not say I condone the fact that she followed the children in order to obtain that information.
I again responded to Lisa’s statement regarding the safety of the children by saying that the original post did not indicate that the PWC had done anything which indicated that the safety of the children was at any point in danger. The PWC has not stated that she approached the children at any point.
“Alice on February 13th, 2013 7:19 pm
there is nothing in the post from Jane Amanda to indicate that she did anything which put the children, or the NRPs partner’s safety at risk. She simply walked the same route and took note of an address which she may or may not use to locate the NRP who is failing in his legal duty by not providing this information to the CSA.”
I cant believe you just said that ‘alice’, I would expect better from you. There is EVERYTHING in the post that ‘suggests she put the children of the new partner at risk’, she is following someone else’s children in the streets.
Do you have children ‘alice’? Do you have ANY indication of the mental state of the person posting? (a clue is in the title) Would you accept the responsibility of any harm that came to those children? What if they saw ‘Jayne’, got scared and ran in front of a car?
For goodness sake people does anyone on here have any idea of cjild protection protocols? Please if anyone including the site moderators have any idea of who Jayne is or what area she comes from they should give the police this info so they can have a ‘quiet word’ with her and make sure she is alright.
I’m sorry but this is just wrong!
staff at the CSA are not paid bonuses based on the amount of money they collect on behalf of the PWC, another invalid assumption from Lisa
I have to say i totally agree J, i have children and the outside world is a big bad place for kids, walking to and from school if its a route they know should be safe, with women around like Jayne its obviously not, Alice if you have children you should not condone any of her behaviour for the sake of a few quid, its disgusting behaviour from you and the poster!!!!!!!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1542204/Staff-at-failing-CSA-get-25m-bonuses.html
@ Alice look at the link above, not assumption, or do the papers lie now?????
Hopefully this wont give another PWC grounds to go following other peopls children just for the sake of an address and info to give the CSA, this is not only morally wrong but also illegal,
Lisa – at which point in this thread did I say in any way shape or form that I condone a person following children ?
J – sorry, but I cannot see anything that has indicated that she did anything other than walk the same route as the children, I live on a street that is a main route from a housing estate to a school, it also goes past shops houses and bus stops – I am regularly on the same route as many children making their way from home to school and vice versa – at no point are any of the children walking ahead of me, behind me or across the street from me in any danger simply by me walking along the path. If the original poster was saying she followed the children and approached them and demanded to know their address etc, she is not saying that the children were even aware that she was there or if so if they knew who she was – I agree that had this been the case then the children may well have become alarmed and this would constitute a safety issue.
Again I reiterate that I did not say that I condoned the actions of the PWC, but there is not anything in the original post to show that this woman has compromised the safety of the children
Lisa – I reiterate – staff are not paid bonuses based on the amount of money they collect on behalf of the PWC
at no point in our annual evaluation is it stated how much an individual case officer has secure in payments or agreements – bonuses are paid in accordance with the level of a person’s evaluation so as stated our bonus is not based on cash collected
J – sorry to side track from this thread but I forget which thread we conversed in last night regarding your DEO issue – I did not get the chance to check the reference code for the booklet issued to employers but I will do so tomorrow and get back to you, I think e-versions are available for download on the internet so let me know which thread we were posting in last night and I will post the relevant link for you
The real killer in this story? I am the one who has found his address each time and passed it onto the CSA as I know where his new partners kids go to school and where his partner works, so it’s just been a matter of following them back home each time.
Oh, and his partner also claims single parents benefits and claims CSA from her two children’s biological father
This is quoted from above, she actually follows children home from school etc, we didt actually say you did alice but you know for a fact she is doing this its a criminal offense and the csa condone this by taking the info she has had to get by people like you at the csa not doing your job properly hence these children having there safety put at risk thru this woman following them which is wrong
CSA staff get paid a bonus for reaching their targets pffft a bonus for ruining thousands of peoples lives and enforcing families and children into poverty. Hope you enjoy your bonus at the expense of peoples misery you cause Alice.
CMEC was a Crown Non-Departmental Public Body between 1 November
2008 and 31 July 2012. Therefore, we are unable to provide data before 1
November 2008. The total amount paid out in bonuses each year is detailed
below:
Year Amount Paid
2011/12 £3,818,771
2010/11 £3,973,598
2009/10 £2,404,125
2008/09* £100,116
* 2008/09 relates to the period 1 November 2008 to 31 March 2009. All
other years relate to 1 April to 31 March.
The amounts shown in the table above include payments in respect to end of
year non-consolidated payments made based on end of year performance
marks and in year non-consolidated awards.
The total bonus payments in 2009/10 seem low compared to 2010/11. The
reason for this is that in 2009/10 some of the funds for year end performance
bonuses were put into non-consolidated base payments as part of a three year
strategy. These have not been included as they were not bonus payments.
Yes Alice I was booted off the coffee morning group people obviously did not like what I had to say about the CSA and how they support abusive PWCs who use children as a weapon and as a cash cow.
“Alice on February 13th, 2013 – J – sorry, but I cannot see anything that has indicated that she did anything other than walk the same route as the children, I live on a street that is a main route from a housing estate to a school, it also goes past shops houses and bus stops – I am regularly on the same route as many children making their way from home to school and vice versa – at no point are any of the children walking ahead of me, behind me or across the street from me in any danger simply by me walking along the path.”
Which bit of ‘common sense’ and child protection do you not get? This person isnt just ‘walking on the same road’ as some children who have nothing to do with her, she is deliberately ‘stalking’ what are ‘targeted’ children that belong to another parent who is not involved in her situation.
I did quite a bit of work on childrens welfare including child protection issues and I can assure you that what this woman is doing is not only wrong but is also dangerous.
Have a chat with your local police and see what they have to say. It is VERY worrying and as you work in an organisation that involves ‘child welfare’ issues you should be very concerned.
Alice on February 13th, 2013 6:18 pm
If an NRP is moving and not informing the CSA of his new address in a bid to avoid his responsibility for paying for his children and the PWC becomes aware of where the NRP is living the PWC has every right to pass this information on to the CSA. Also if a person has knowledge that someone is claiming a benefit that they are not entitled to then they should report this to the benefits agency
Your reply might as well have said doesnt matter who you follow just get us the info so we can take the poor fellas cash end of, the safety of these children has and will always be compromised by women like these who have fallen on hard times and are desperate for the money
“Alice on February 13th, 2013 – so let me know which thread we were posting in last night and I will post the relevant link for you”
Will check.
Craig is there any way we can find out where the woman who posts this comes from, maybe local police there need to look at the thread and see that a womans children are putting in very real danger from a woman stalking them to get there mums boyfriends address and work details, yes the csa condone this and its wrong,?????
Again – I do not condone the use of children for obtaining information – I would not suggest to a PWC that they put any child at risk in order to obtain an address or for an NRP who is avoiding their obligation. Similarly I do not condone an NRP or a PWC who uses their own child to influence their case – as a case worker I have had many calls over the years where an NPR or PWC will demand that I speak to their child so that the child can tell me when where or how often they stay with the NRP or PWC etc – aside from the fact that the CSA do not allow case workers to speak to the child I personally would not ever consider it acceptable to speak with a child on a CSA issue.
The CSA do trace work when an NRP is no longer at the address we have for them on file,. We use legitimate desk based tracing tools to do this.
My statement regarding the fact that the PWC has every right to pass on an address for an NRP was in response to Lisa’s statement that the NRPs life has nothing to do with the PWC – the fact remains that it does, he is the father of children for whom he is refusing to take responsibility for. If he is not supplying the csa with his current address – which as a side failure to do so is a criminal offence on the part of the NRP and if found guilty he could be fined up to £1000 – and the PWC is aware of his current address she has the right to pass this information on to the CSA. At no point have I said the PWC was right to follow the children.
@ Alice The message to the CSA contractor should be, “Buck up, serve your customers, earn your keep, or clear your desks and get out.”This is what the minster had to say about staff who dont do there jobs properly and within the law, maybe i should send her a copy of the above and see if he thinks your fab at your job, The CSA website states that the CSA can help to
“ensure parents who live apart from their children contribute financially to their upkeep…work out who should pay and how much…make sure more children receive the maintenance they are entitled to…take quick and firm action to make sure payments get made”.
It has failed to fulfil any of those tasks
Maria Miller is being sent all this, lets hope they manange to locate you, seeing we all use the web its so easy to find somebody these days regardless of whether they are hiding behind a false name,
Alice it is a criminal offense not to pass details onto the CSA we already know that, Why do NRP not do it, because they get so much cash taken from they cant afford to live, it isnt about not contributing to there kids upbringing, its about whats right and wrong, how would you feel if you were a NRPP and you couldt afford to feed your children, please answer that because i have been there and done it, being suicidal isnt a nice feeling knowing that your failing to do your duties as a parent by not being able to do the most basic of task and thats feeding them and keeping them warm because the PWC has all your hard earned cash, flash car and lovely holidays at the expense of me, now what would you do in that situation
“Alice on February 13th, 2013 – The CSA do trace work when an NRP is no longer at the address we have for them on file,. We use legitimate desk based tracing tools to do this.”
Wholly acceptable, distasteful perhaps to some but legitimate. Following people per se is not always a bad thing, a ‘professional’ organisation would have the correct training, legal framework and indemnity insurances, the police for example will back off in a chase if lives are put at risk. This is a distraught parent at her wits end following someone else’s children in an emotive situation. That should ring alarm bells or anyone!
“…in response to Lisa’s statement that the NRPs life has nothing to do with the PWC – the fact remains that it does, he is the father of children for whom he is refusing to take responsibility for.”
I have no argument with that point. My only concern is for the children, who don’t belong to the NRP or the PWC but in fact to a third party. We should not be arguing or get distracted.
Jayne needs help with her claim, fair enough but her statements and actions suggest she is getting ‘desparate’ and may need ‘additional’ help. Again all I would say is following other peoples kids is pretty spooky whichever way you look at it.
The point i was trying t make was that Jane is the EX for a reason and what her ex partner does in his life doesnt have anything to do with her, Just like my ex,s life doesnt have anything to do with me, he is a single man can do as he pleases, i dont know what he earns i dont want to know, its NONE of my business, but the poster does need help, there is a real danger here that this woman will do something stupid because the CSA dont do there jobs properly,
Questions on this particular posting, 1) how far has Ms Amanda travelled to follow these children? 2) What (other than no maintenance) has made Ms Amanda to go to these lengths, 3) Has the CSA failed Ms Amanda, 4) A very bizarre image of Ms Amanda has flown through my mind, was she disguised as Miss Marple, was she wearing a long coat, hat, specs and a beard. 5) has following the children actually achieved anything. 6) Does Ms Amanda need help or arresting.
Personally i feel for the poor woman because obviously she is troubled, either financially, emotionally or just plain ill.
Anyway, said my bit, now you can all carry on bickering and overlook the fact, that someone is actually crying out for help here, just a thought.
J – agreement in part – following children in a manner whereby the children are unaware or unaffected by the action does not automatically put the child in danger, obviously if the ‘follower’ was a trained professional this makes the safety risk less as they would be more cautious and risk factors would be paramount in their minds when doing so.
An assumption that Jane ‘is a distraught parent at her wits end following someone else’s children in an emotive situation’. I understand the basis of the assumption – and yes if Jane is at her wits end etc then yes this would set alarm bells ringing – but there is also a chance that Jane happened to be in the area of the school for valid reasons, she may have been in a calm state of mind and saw an opportunity to obtain information which could benefit her CSA case which did not involve endangering the children in question.
Lisa – Jane’s ex is her ex, and obviously there will be a reason, lets not assume that the reason is down to Jane, equally we should not assume that the reason is down to him.
The point is he is Jane’s ex -partner – he is not (unless Jane’s children have subsequently been adopted) an ex-father. A person may be absolved of their obligation to a partner but they are not absolved of their obligation to their child or children
@ Topper – the answers to your questions are not known, as such the worst case scenario is reached based on assumptions.
@ Alice, Assumptions are never a good thing, assume, makes an ass of u & me. I never intended to answer the dilemma, just though that I might just throw in some questions.
ALICE. You are a SICKO! cant really say much more !
@ Topper – I fully agree with you – assumptions are indeed never a good – or accurate – course of action. As you say you did not seek to answer the dilemma, your thoughts may lead to others re-thinking their assumption
Like you, I feel for Jane – she has posted a statement and others have read between the lines and made assumptions and immediately condemned the poor woman as being a person who has put children in danger and concluded that these children are quite possibly frightened- there is as much chance that the children involved are totally unaware that a person happened to see which house they went into one day after school and the only thing that is bothering them is whether their packed lunch box will contain a biscuit instead of an apple tomorrow
Its all about the money and CSA statistic your interested in Alice
Craig – like Lisa you assume, and your assumption is incorrect. you do not know me. As with Lisa your opinion of me is of little concern to me, if you get personal satisfaction from thinking whatever you think of me then so be it, it does not put me up nor down. I will not however communicate with you as I see no reason to do so
Regardless of what state of.mind this.woman is in, she had.followed another womans children that have bugger all to do with.the case where CSA are.concerned,when people split up it.then becomes.a seperate.life and even if the man.is her childrens.father still has nothing to do with her where he lives like I said before and will say again CSA fail.many families this.obviously being one of.them, its a poor do thw csa cant be arsed to search for the man in the first place maybe.then this.woman.wouldt have had to commit an.offense to begin with
@ Alice…. We all appreciate that people’s ‘opinion’ of you means nothing to you but for me, that speaks volumes…. The people who post on this (and other) websites do so out of need and we form an opinion based on experience of that person. You, like ‘chall’ are starting to become unprofessional …. If you cannot accept the devastating effect the dysfunctional CSA is having on our society then I hope to god that you are childless (so that your children cannot inherit your attitude) or that you are advising from behind bars because from what I have read from your posts tonight does not give me faith in humanity…
Alice no wonder CSA staff come under threat with stinking attitudes like yours you should be named and shamed along with a lot more of you vile disgusting parasite co workers. One day Alice you and your beloved Nazi agency will be held accountable for your murders and treason and enforcing children into poverty not forgetting making them homeless to.
“Alice on February 13th, 2013 9:51 pm – An assumption that Jane ‘is a distraught parent at her wits end following someone else’s children in an emotive situation’. I understand the basis of the assumption – and yes if Jane is at her wits end etc then yes this would set alarm bells ringing – but there is also a chance that Jane happened to be in the area of the school for valid reasons, she may have been in a calm state of mind and saw an opportunity to obtain information which could benefit her CSA case which did not involve endangering the children in question.”
Are we reading the same post ‘alice’?
“I followed the children of my ex’s new partner to find where he lives – February 13, 2013
I am at a loss. …
…The real killer in this story? I am the one who has found his address each time and passed it onto the CSA as I know where his new partners kids go to school and where his partner works, so it’s just been a matter of following them back home each time.
I feel like a complete mug.
Written by Jane Amanda ”
Lots of ‘clues’ in the statement made by jayne dont you think? Have you read the post properly? Obviously it is an emotive situation, ‘I’m at a loss’ sounds like someone who has run out of rational ideas, followed by not so rational behaviour, ‘so it’s just been a matter of following them back home each time.’ isnt a case of someone who ‘happened to be in the area’ for valid reasons, on more than one occasion. Its stalking!
I’m not ‘bickering’ Topper, if you look at my posts of 8:05 pm , 8:54pm and 9:26pm
you may see that my concern throughout has been for the welfare and safety of the children that were being followed and the possibility that ‘jayne’ may need ‘additional support’, from other providers, as well as a financial result from the csa.
I’ve been a PWC and NRP. I dont know jayne or her ex. I’m not interested in their relationship breakdown. I have worked in this ‘environment’ in the past and have had some experience of childrens situations. I am simpy concerned at the (repeated) (look again alice it isnt a one off accidental sighting in the street) and deliberate actions involved in following somebody elses children.
However ‘alice’ tries to square it, my training and experience make the whole thing a bit worrying for me and I would rather err on the side of caution in terms of child protection. It may well be that ‘jayne’ is totally in control and means no harm to the kids, I’m not ‘assuming’ anything of that nature, BUT its a ‘regular event, if the children see her…, what if the new partner sees her…, what if her ex sees her…?
Follow your ex if thats what gets you going but DO NOT follow other peoples children, that is wrong on every level.
@Alice, pathetic parasite springs to mind, dont give up your day job will.you,
“Craig on February 13th, 2013 11:28 pm – Alice no wonder CSA staff come under threat with stinking attitudes like yours you should be named and shamed along with a lot more of you vile disgusting parasite co workers.”
I dont condone anything that puts others at risk, even if I dont like what they do particularly. We all have kids, thats what this site is for. What if those kids go to school with a csa worker, what if a distraught parent finds out and follows the csa workers kids home to find out where they live. What if the csa worker comes home to find a protest from one of the more ‘radical’ groups of ‘Superheroes’ camped on their doorstep in a protest???
I would NEVER condone that! Why? Because you DONT follow other peoples children! It is a sign of a disturbed mind.
“What if those kids go to school with a csa worker,” – meant to say a csa workers kids, you know what I mean. Point is it would be wrong.
J I.totally agree, if csa staff can tell PWC to.folow there ex to.find out where he.works I.wouldt put it past them to.have told the woman to.do.this because CSA dont work.quick.enough, still wrong whichever way,.the place is a disgrace, shut.it.down.n n.start a fresh, this.time with properly trained staff
j – not having a pop at you, however consider this these CSA parasites have put many families and their children into poverty and have made them homeless not forgetting the children who now have no fathers because the CSA have pushed them to suicide? They do not care about that as long as they reach their targets to collect their bonus. No I most certainly do not condone following kids home that is wrong and as you have seen the CSA staff seem to think that it is ok. Maybe if people did go and camp outside of a CSA staff members home I am not against that at all they invade peoples privacy and make their lives hell so its about time these scum got a taste of their own medicine and learn that one day their evil doings will come back to bite them on their arse. Thousands upon thousands of people have had enough of this and the agencies lies and fraud, I was made homeless because of these pieces of shit all because they thought they could abuse their power and get away with it. They are wrong and they are brainwashed.
These CSA brainwashed morons are only going to learn what they do is wrong when people who they have abused do to them what they have done in return
“Craig on February 13th, 2013 11:59 pm
j – not having a pop at you, however consider this these CSA parasites have put many families and their children into poverty and have made them homeless not forgetting the children who now have no fathers because the CSA have pushed them to suicide? ”
No offence taken.
I am not trying to ‘defend’ alice, but I’m not ‘having a go at him/her either. I’m trying not to be personal and hope I dont cause offence. (I know I do sometimes so sorry folks)
I understand ‘alice’ is trying to say to the original post that the csa will act on information received. I’m just concerned at the behaviour of the person who made the post – ‘so it’s just been a matter of following them back home each time.’ – EACH time???!!! Following someone else’s children, each time?
I don’t condone anything ‘drastic’ but really (really) do have some idea of your strength of feeling Craig, and sorry to hear your situation. I’m still fighting the csa now, its been over five years and I am quite ill but I do it because if I give up my children lose their inheritence to the secretary of state, to pay a ‘debt’ that should never have arisen as I wasn’t working and only arose because of csa ‘incompetence’.
Maybe if the secretary of state took a long walk off a short pier, or the warped senior civil servant who dreamed up the csa, then things might change, maybe. I don’t think camping on ‘alice’s’ lawn would change much though.
Once again I would suggest to the person who made the orginal post that they consider their actions. I do empathise with them but following someone else’s kids? What if there was an accident as I said earlier, no amount of money the csa could get is worth a childs life. Would they want that on their conscience for the sake of money?
I’m not ‘having a go’ at alice or the original post, just voicing my concerns and stating my opinion.
J no offence taken at all, and I totally agree with your concerns about this post.
Especially the Each time that is very disturbing that is bordering stalking which I believe that there are anti laws in place.
The secretary of state needs a good beating as do all of those idiots who are in parliament they are a disgrace, they know how badly the CSA treat people yet they still allow them to abuse people, all in their crusade of lifting children out of poverty.
Yes they do make people ill they have made me ill that is for sure and had it not been for sites like this so i could vent I would not be here now. As long as Alice was not involved with my case then I would see no point in camping on her lawn, however the morons that have been involved with my case and abused their power and raised an unlawful DEO which made me homeless the likes of Gary Chick and Sue waldron of Plymouth, those are the people whos garden I would camp in. Because of those inbred tossers I now have no fixed abode and I sleep on an old army friends sofa in an army sleeping bag so you bet I am pissed off, I loved my job but those incompetent wankers have trashed my career so I will happily make their lives hell. I served 16 years in the army to be treated like shit off these CSA nobody’s who have done nothing at all of any use for this country apart from make people lives a misery, homeless and enforce them into poverty. They are disgusting and should be ashamed of what they do, just so they can reach their targets to get a bonus. I hope the rats have a long slow painful death.
There are a few things that bother me in this case.
if the nrp discovers that the children are being followed that could lead to a complaint of harasssment, irrespective of what the CSA state about changing address, without notifying them. it does not give a pwc the right to harass the nrp or the children.Once again we see that the CSA thnk that they are a law unto themselves.
if it would have remained a private matter without the pwc involving the CSA, contact would have remained with the nrp, and may be they would have provided finances in due course. So, we see yet again, as with so many other cases, that the pwc encouraged by the CSA to ensnare the pwc into the CSA system is counter productive, as the children lose contact with a parent, because the state and staff at the CSA want to impose their incompetence on the the pwc, impoverise them, demonise them and attempt to criminalise them.
I’m looking forward to the demise of the shambolic CSA, when at some stage in the future someone will have the financial clout to use the high courts and supreme courrts to rule this system as illegal.
Im an nrpp, if I thought for one second my husbands ex was following me or my children to get info I would be alarmed and angry, my life and what goes on in my home is fluff all to do with her, like her life is fluff all to do with me.
@alice
You say a pwc has that right because the father is responsible in his obligations, well shouldn’t that work both ways or is it only an ibligation when money is involved?
Why in some cases an nrp who pays for their children have no right to know where their children reside, if they have left full time education the list goes on, yet the pwc has the right to pass on info supplied under alarming circumstances? Surely a pwc has the same obligations too, it works both ways.
Also, it seems pretty obvious to me that the OP hasn’t stumbled on her ex’s situation by chance. How does she know he actually lives there by following somebody elses children….yes following, how creepy is that? Or that his ‘new’ partner gets maintenance from their dads? What lengths has this woman gone to to get csa their information?
Think I’l stay out of this one…..
I followed my ex partner and the children.
Make of that what you will.
I also followed my ex’s partner from where she worked to their home,
make of that what you will also.
At no point where unaccompanied children followed.
This after my 9 year old has had zero contribution financially over the years from her dad. How can I be money grabbing when I have had nothing to contribute the upbringing of my child, yet my ex moves from job to job, from house to house hiding from his debts.
Those who say I am the one in the wrong will never change their mind, such is the way of this country.
Also to add, I have NEVER told my ex he cannot see his daughter.
He threw away his mobile that was my only contact to him. He knows where I live, I have never moved and I still have all the same contact details.
So, would none of you try to help the CSA to find your ex, given these circumstances or am I just an evil person who has no right to financial help with her child and should be forced to go it alone, as I have had to do anyway.
@ Jo – well said…. “You say a pwc has that right because the father is responsible in his obligations, well shouldn’t that work both ways or is it only an ibligation when money is involved?”
The PWC will report something to the CSA and they act on it WITHOUT any evidence or proof and yet they CSA tell the NRP’s they cannot act on information provided due to data protection… i.e. benefit fraud… child in employment, child not living with PWC… if it wasn’t so disgusting it would be laughable…
Just goes to show you the twisted minds at the CSA, and proves that they could not give a monkeys chuff about the children it is all about the money, their targets and statistic .
Well said John………. (if it would have remained a private matter without the pwc involving the CSA, contact would have remained with the nrp, and may be they would have provided finances in due course. So, we see yet again, as with so many other cases, that the pwc encouraged by the CSA to ensnare the NRP into the CSA system is counter productive, as the children lose contact with a parent, because the state and staff at the CSA want to impose their incompetence on the the NRP, impoverise them, demonise them and attempt to criminalise them.)……,,,,,. So it would seem that the CSA now encourage not only the PWC to open a case against the NRP with the promise of financial gain, which incidentally is a breach of policy, but they also encourage the PWC to stalk the NRP and his new family and children. This obviously gives the CSA staff more time and saves them the effort so they can continue to abuse and come down hard on the NRP who is already paying. This abhorrent abusive agency needs a public inquiry. Alice has just shown the true colours of how brainwashed that the organisation is. The PWC has the right to do such acts as follow children home so she can report back to the CSA. I am sure she would love that if it was done to her children ……. NOT! I cant think of a word bad enough to describe this out of control organization and the inbred morons that work for it. Alice you must be so proud of working for an organization that so many thousands of people hate and want to tear apart. Well its all in the name of lifting children out of poverty isn’t it…..? Wake up Alice.
Jane, I was also a single mum who had no choice and had to it go alone….would I follow my ex and his partner and her children who are nothing to do with me….answer no I wouldn’t as its not right.
If your ex doesn’t want anything to do with his child then frankly shame on him but you can’t follow another woman’s children to and from school, they are innocent in this as is his new partner.
You need to let the authorities do their job, regardless how slow it maybe as they are acting within the law.
You say you haven’t moved, well thats your choice and no one is causing you any concern to move…how would you feel if his new partner followed you or your child, would you feel comfortable with it?
@ jane amanda, Would i not help the CSA to get details certainly not by following innocent children that had absolutly nothing to do with your case, They are your Ex,s partners children, If had done that to somebody i would expect a knock at the door from the police, its wrong
Your ex owes you nothing in his lfe really, yes you might want his money but what goes on in his home and him and his partners life really isnt any of your business, its stalking by most means and i think you need to think more about being a mum to your own kids instead of chasing other peoples,
Maybe you didt stop your ex from seeing his daughter, have you ever thought the reason he doesnt is because of the way you are????? From what you have said on a public forum its clear you have quite a few issues, maybe you forgetting your ex and moving on is a start, money isnt everything your kids need a mum, isnt that more important than ringing the parasites at the CSA just to line your pockets with a few quid,
j – the booklet you need is CSL313
http://www.dsdni.gov.uk/csl313.pdf
What is my role in helping my employees pay child maintenance?
Jane, ok it sounds like your ex partner is not a great dad (if what you say is true about the mobile and not wanting contact)
But following another woman and her children home from school, covertly…IS disturbing. It is a safe guarding issue, a serious one at that, and I am horrified that Alice thinks its ok just so long as they get the details they want in order to cash in the MONEY. CSA claim to be there for the children…well what about these children being stalked? Dont they also have the right to any kind of welfare?
Jane, I have had mountainous debts, and a child to look after and I managed on benefits etc until I got part time work, and so this whole “at a loss” seems to me (forgive me if I am wrong) but it seems the root cause of this is you are not completely over your ex, the abandonment, or his new life with a new woman. Been there and I know its a kick in the guts, but you and your daughter will be fine if you try and let go of who he is, and what hes not, and just stop going to these desperate measures.
Ok I dont know the whole story, but I can only say from what you wrire and the tone of your post. As a mother, if my partners ex followed me and my children, I would report her to the police and I would be angry and freaked out. Its morally wrong, Jane. No wonder the csa have no qualms…..
Hope you and daughter can just move of from all of this and your ex.
To be fair carol i hope she has been reported to the police to stop her doing this again, those kids that she is following should be priority, I agree with the safeguarding issue and the Followed childrens welfare is papramount, The CSA do not take other peoples children into account just lure them into danger and turn mums into bloody nutcases by never doing there job right
Indeed, maybe it will stop her, but she will only find other ways to stalk. I bet she goes online looking for him and trying to suss out his life via social networking sites, 192.com and all the rest of it. Cant be working, who would have all the energy and time to be stalking your ex and his partner after a long day at work, collecting kids, coming in, doing tea, dishes, catching up with friends, bath, sorting letters out etc etc….. Only someone with too much time on their hands and too much emotionally invested (unhealthily it seems) would go to those extreme lengths of following a woman and her children. I cannot support dysfunction like this, under any circumstances.
Well said Carol, the thing I also find incredibly disturbing is the fact a CSA employee thinks that it is ok for the PWC to do this to get the information back to the agency. It is quite obvious that the CSA do not care about children. It is only the money that they are interested in. Well done Alice for showing the truth behind the agency.
Yes Craig, this all comes down to money. So like the SS, they get rewarded with bonuses for meeting targets….tbh wasnt surprised to read your list of how much they got (good find btw)
Profiting in such a way is beyond moral. Condoning stalking children is beyond moral. I ask Karma to step in here…..and to be swift about it.
Hi all,
“Alice on February 14th, 2013 6:21 pm
j – the booklet you need is CSL313″
Thank you alice, will look it up. Will come back and post results if I get any further.
Hello to the original poster on this thread,
“Jane Amanda on February 14th, 2013 11:49 am
I followed my ex partner and the children”
Your original post was not specific, the way it is written – “… I know where his new partners kids go to school and where his partner works, …” doesn’t read like you followed your ex. I don’t know how you found the school but it seems that you followed the kids. Are you saying that your ex picks them up, are they primary kids? What do you think some of the parents would say if a ‘strange’ woman was seen hanging around the school and following kids? You are a parent, what would you do?
I do have sympathy with your situation, we all have some pretty bad stories to share thats why this site is here. Go and read a few posts, your situation is not unique. I’m still fighting after five years, for a ‘debt’ I don’t owe and have been told the money doesn’t even go to my other child. (now grown up and back in touch)
I appreciate and accept you feel ‘let down’, by your ex and perhaps the csa, you feel it is ‘only fair’ that your ex should contribute financially and as you have agreed to access its not your fault he won’t play ball.
Most people on here would support you in that. Where we ALL (I think) have a problem is the fact that you are following someone else’s kids! You are involving the new partner (to some extent) and its not her fault. Maybe she claims benefits because your ex is too selfish to help her financially, have you thought of that? Are you just jealous because her ex is paying for his kids?
Stop ‘beating yourself up’ by following the other woman or the kids or even your ex like some kind of weird stalker. You have done what you can now let people like ‘alice’ get on with it. Move on with your life. From what you have said he will only give up work again, find someone else, move towns etc. Are you just jealous?
Let it go now and concentrate on you and your own child.
Some of the people on here are a joke.
Lisa, J etc
Oh my god – the real reason why people have CSA hell in the first place are lack of morals, and you two take the biscuit.
Good grief
You really need help dont you.
“Jane Amanda on February 15th, 2013 10:18 am – Some of the people on here are a joke. Lisa, J etc Oh my god – the real reason why people have CSA hell in the first place are lack of morals, and you two take the biscuit.”
If you look at all the posts on here you will find that 12 out of 13 contributors all share a similar concern – your behaviour! ‘Alice’ is excused as she (or he) works for the csa and therefore has a vested interest.
Some of us have been PWC’s, some have been NRP’s, some like myself have been both so please keep your rude, arrogantg comments to yourself until you have some idea of what its all about. You are not the only person with problems, you are not the only person who has not had any help, you are not the most important person on the planet and the sooner you realise that the better.
You are following your ex, his new partner, her children! I’ve tried so hard to be ‘nice’ and ‘positive’ and understanding but you really do come across as a sick psycho bxtch and I only hope you get some urgent help and possibly medication to control your erratic behaviour.
When I was a PWC I got NO help from my ex OR the csa but like most decent, rational, mentally stable people on here I didn’t follow my ex around like some kind of psychotic stalker!
People have ‘csahell’ for three main reasons – NRP’s that refuse to pay anything no matter what, PWC’s who are greedy and csa incompetence.
If the whole situation was put back into the Courts where it belongs then half of these problems would stop fairly quickly but get this, if you went into Court and made the statement you have made in your original post you would probably be arrested, and rightly so.
Get some professional help you weird psycho you are pretty scary and I don’t blame your ex one bit. I hope he gets away with it and from you and perhaps social services should pay you a quick visit to check on your situation.
If your ex ever reads this I hope he puts in for a residence order for your child.
Omg are you for real? The joke my love is you, where is your child when your out stalking your ex and his new family? You sound very miserable and lonely. You talk about morals, take a good look in the mirror. You expect sympathy and didn’t get it, apart from alice who has a much greater interest, but doesn’t condone what you did but who cares as long as you and the csa get what they want. When I used to ring csa on my case, first thing they say, do you know where he lives or any information for us and always get the same response….in my opinion it was their job to track to him and not mine. I was 7 years in and gave up, no point and to be honest as a single mum didn’t struggle, yes I worked and paid child care, kids still had nice clothes and I
kept a roof above our heads and lived within my means.
@ j
Well said….she isn’t the only one who’s had it hard….ive been on both sides of the fence and its shit no matter which end you’re on. But I would not dream in a million years of wasting my time and effort following my ex or my husbands ex….thats the authorities job and what they’re paid to do!
Why can’t people just get on with it? It’s pretty obvious that no amount of chasing is going to get people to pay up or take responsibility, thinking that it will just makes you bitter and twisted.
You call me a joke, take a long hard look around you love, we have all been there and done it, without being sad enough to follow innocent children to and from school to home, you might not realise this but your ex owes you nothing, as a woman it goes like this, what happens with your body is upto you, your decision, you decided to have that baby without input from your ex, cos he wouldt be your ex otherwise, you are that childs mum you bring it up, part and parcel of being a mum get over it, I have been the PWC and the NRPP, regardless of which i didt like a sad cow go snooping and following people, give your friggin head a wobble get a grip and if your that desperate go find yourself a millionaire to keep you in the lifestyle you obviously crave, dumb bint
I strongly advise the Non resident parent in this matter ,or anyone in
the same situation to get themselves abroad,Any REMO put into
effect between states only applies to monies owed before before
the NRP left the united kingdom also a claim can not be started or
continued once an NRP is resident in another state.Any legal action
against an NRP in another country would have to be heard before
a judge and proper evidence would have to be shown that the NRP
owed any money.To add to that A judge in another European state
would most likely have to take in to account your basic living expenses
if A Judgement went against you.
Sally on February 13th, 2013 11:12 pm
@ Alice…. We all appreciate that people’s ‘opinion’ of you means nothing to you but for me, that speaks volumes…. The people who post on this (and other) websites do so out of need and we form an opinion based on experience of that person. You, like ‘chall’ are starting to become unprofessional ….
Sally, the sooner you realise that neither Alice, myself or anybody else for that matter, has any obligation to squeeze into your own personal requirements of what you expect from others, the more beneficial it would be for the other people who post on here and sites like this, who actually need factual information and not assumptions.
Just my two penneth and like topper, I will leave you to continue bickering…
chall
@ chall – are you going to start causing trouble again chall??? you may not have noticed, but no-one has really missed your comments or childish outbursts so please refrain from getting personal…
And the sooner you and Alice realise that the people you are giving ‘advice’ to are human beings the quicker you will understand why emotions are involved… what I expect from people like you and Alice is to provide a service that is impartial without getting nasty when people don’t agree with you…
You hide behind the guise of ‘chall- afairersystemforall’ and yet you are bias in your response and bully people when they disagree with you… so lets not go there… YOU and Alice do NOT always provide factual information… this has been proven by J. Lisa, Bonnie and a few other so don’t get on your high horse…. you and Alice know more than most people on here but you get it wrong and other people are left confused…. so maybe you sure make sure your ‘facts’ are 100% correct before you give ‘advice’…
Now now Sally no ‘bickering’ please, you read the post by chall who added their ‘two pennath’ to the debate, chall has stated quite correctly that – “… the more beneficial it would be for the other people who post on here and sites like this, who actually need factual information and not assumptions. …” So there you are.
Mind you I have had another look at the original post and can’t quite see what ‘factual information’ the person wanted? They have not asked for any specific information, nor have they ended their post with ‘does anybody have any advice’?!
Perhaps chall reads something into the post that we cannot see? It seems to me that the person who did the original comment was making a statement rather than seeking ‘advice’. I mean it did come across as a bit of a rant, seemed like bickering for the sake of it to me.
If it is of any help I think most of us ‘advised’ that stalking (isn’t that a criminal offence) wasn’t the best way forward and when children are involved it is particularly worrying.
There will always be those who think that ‘stalking’ is acceptable behaviour, some may even think that following other peoples children is also ok. I find that repulsive myself but thats just my view.
I think the closest the original post came to seeking information was in how to make a complaint against the incompetence of the csa? Maybe chall (or even alice) could help in this regard?
@ j. lol lol lol my goodness, he/she is back on site 2 minutes and already she’s dictating what ‘I must realise’…
compared to the idiots at the CSA, chall is actually quite entertaining… i’d rather deal with her any time… split personality or not, she certainly knows how to get attention… 
If the system was simple,fair and flexible, that would be a start.
If it was not discriminatory against the nrp and there was a degree of empathy, that would cut the nrp some slack, you wouldn’t mind.
If they didn’t attempt to criminalise and demonise the nrp. as if they were pariahs.
But Oh no, it’s their way or the highway, we must comply with this flawed legislation and the oafs who attempt to implement it.
Important matters involving children belong in the courts with professional qualified people, and not with untrained idiots at the CSA.
They dress it up as they like, every nrp and most pwc’s knows it a shambles!
@ Sally, ignore tham hun, we know the CSA are a bunch of thieving self centred gits only after one thing, lining there own pockets, money money money is the only thing they care about, all one sided and very biased, Alice and Chall should be ashamed
As I said before and keep saying the reason why the system is unfair is due to some who play the system whether PWC or NRP but there are many bitter twisted people on here who have nothing better to do with their time by try to belittle and undermine others. Shame on them, as what do they teach their children? Join the facebook groups Child Support Agencies Failings for advise and support.